HUGE UPDATE!
Soooo.... I HAPPENED!!! IT'S DONE!!!
I came out to my boss! We sat at a café in the Grote Markt of a small city nearby and I told him that I had written a letter for him to read and that I'd like him to read it "here and now" and after he's done with the reading we would discuss... He began reading... He kept reading... He finished reading. And then, smiling:
"Sarah, I'm really happy that you came out to me! I think you should have done it sooner. What were you afraid of? People should live the way they feel happy and if in your case that means transitioning from man to woman, so be it! I'm really happy with you doing this!"
I couldn't believe my ears. Was this just a very vivid dream? I pinched myself under the table, just to be sure and... Ouch! Nope... Definitely not a dream!
And then, he kept on saying that some people had noticed changes about me. They didn't talk much in my back. Apparently, some of them think that I'm coming out as gay (well... technically they're not entirely wrong because... well... I'm a lesbian)... A few have mentioned the possibility that I could be transgender. But he also said that nobody had expressed a negative view about it!
He said that his best friend is gay, he has many homossexual friends and he also happens to have a friend who is transgender. He said that my transition won't change absolutely zilch about the entirely positive opinion that he has about me.
He gave me an example of which I wasn't aware. A colleague of us, one of the top emergency doctors in the country, Winne Haenen, who transitioned at the age of 55. She was the top responsible emergency physician (catastrophe manager) during the 2016 Brussels terrorist attacks and that fatidic March 22 was actually her first day as Winne (she was formerly known as Wim).
He proceeded advising me not only to come out as soon as possible to our team (doctors and nurses), so they get comfortable with the idea, but also to do it face to face, because there was absolutely no reason to expect negative reactions and an e-mail would "sound" too impersonal. After talking with him, I do share his view and no later than tomorrow I'll be coming out to four of my fellow doctors!
He also told me that there would be absolutely no problems with asking for a 4 week leave for my FFS (and probably a part of my BCS, perhaps BA); it would just be a matter of planning ahead.
Then, my boss's girlfriend joined us and a few seconds before she actually sat down, my boss asked me if I was okay with him telling her and I thought... whatever: "Sure!" And OMG, she reacted so naturally and friendly! She asked me if I intended to fully transition and told me she liked my chosen name.
And there we spent almost 2 hours, although it felt more like 30 minutes.
You know, girls... Today, I have the feeling that not only I came out to my boss and prepared the terrain for the rest of my coming out at work, but I also gained two good friends. I am sooooo happy!
Thank you all a million times for your support! You can't remotely fathom how crucial were your words along the last few weeks, since beginning this thread. You helped me exorcise the fear and shame which were preventing me from blossoming into the woman I am, the Sarah I've always been. Thank you...
This is just one more (huge) step along this rocky road, but it feels soooo good and just makes me crave getting quickly to the next challenge! Promise I'll keep you posted about my adventures!
Your sister and friend in heart,
Sarah
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