MTF and Heavy weights / Bodybuilding / Crossfit

[Alexa Ares]

Since coming to terms with myself recently, I have mixed feelings about muscle and lifting weights. I have a bodybuilder background. While I am not as big and lean as I used to be when trying really hard to feel Male, I still enjoy the feeling of heavy weights and like to have wide shoulders and a very round butt and strong legs. Arms I don't train directly now.

I see lots of genetic and trans women like to lift light weights and tone, however this is not me. I have tried to train like this but find hard and heavy much more ME.

I am feeling that like some genetic women like to be strong and muscly, so do some trans women. There's a case for not throwing out the baby with the bathwater. I have alot of background in fitness and Already am schooling some female friends on how to train glutes for results.

Part of self acceptance I feel Is still acknowledging I like weights, the outdoors and football. As well as being into a beauty regime and gossip magazines (I don't want to be stereotypical ie women are like this, men are like that ad this isny real)

What Im asking is who else is into serious weight training and how do you feel about the impact of transition on your body in terms of its strength?  For me  I like strength. Nothing extreme but the idea of not being able to do at least 10 pull ups and squat 200 pounds for reps scares me as I fear not being able to pick up my kids or manhandle somebody in a fight.

For me, appearing feminine is more broad than it may be for some other people. For example to name someone I think Dana Lynn Bailey is very feminine and has a great look. For some she may be too muscly.

[Deborah]

We are rare around here but not totally alone.

Right now I'm powerlifting three times a week after two years of HRT and no strength training.  My primary goal is to get strong for running so I'm focusing on strength over size to avoid a lot of weight gain.  I'm also seeing if I can get some hip size out of this.

I started out again pretty weak, LOL, but it is coming back fairly quickly.  I only did legs in June and July and then started adding some upper body for balance.

So right now my legs are as strong as ever before and I'm squatting 255 and deadlifting 320 for reps at 170 lbs body weight (a few of those lbs are creatine).

Upper body is lagging maybe because of HRT and also because I started later.  So there I'm only at 135 for bench, 135 for rows, and 95 for overhead press for reps.

I'm happy with the way it makes me look and especially the way it makes me feel too.  Mostly so far it has increased muscle tone a whole lot with not too much added size.  It also knocked off about five pounds of fat with ten pounds of lean gain since March. 

I'm also running about 20 miles a week to keep up aerobic conditioning.  That's about all I can manage right now and still recover sufficiently in between strength sessions.

My big surprise in all this is that low to non existent testosterone is much less a factor in strength improvement than I thought it would be.


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[Charlie Nicki]

Hi Alexa,

I met a transwoman in Australia who was very early in her transition and was a proud football player. She said she wasn't going to stop lifting cuz she liked being a strong player. So you are definitely not alone. The beauty of transitioning is having the freedom to build our identity the way we want to; we don't have to fit in any mold or stereotype of what a woman is.

[Alexa Ares]

Thanks for the replies. Deborah it's interesting to read how much strength you.have been.Able to develop. Is it muscle memory, ie weights you were able to lift before transition?
Double bodyweight on a deadlift Is not bad at all....I notice the upper body numbers as you said are lower and this Is typical of female bodybuilders I've known...ie they can squat 300 at 160 lbs bw but are benching maybe 160....

It does make me think, as there are genetic women out there who aren't on steroids yet do build some decent amount of muscle and strength despite Low testosterone levels.

That you able to do all that lifting and run 20 miles a week Is impressive. I am way more towards the weights and sprints side of training. Am about 165 at 5-7. I plan to liposuction out the waist a bit as don't want to diet too hard and flatten out my butt. We all have our ideas of beauty and myself I like round glutes so want to keep and develop this more.

If you don't mind me asking what hrt are you doing?  From what I'm gathering, a low moderate dose of estrogen may give some nice effects without shutting down the possibility of holding onto muscle and being relativity strong.

Charlie Nikki, yeah I think I read about her. It is good for there to be more transwomen coming out and being open that they are sporty. For me, it took so long to get beyond the fact I have masculine facial features and have significant muscle development to accept I'm Transgendered.

Genetic women who are muscly are not less female. So Girls like Me who like to lift should not feel less trans female.

As my wife points out, I may have moments where I feel I would like to be ultra feminine, however being real and authentic with myself it's important to acknowledge that I do love physical activity and strength.

[Deborah]

Thanks for the replies. Deborah it's interesting to read how much strength you.have been.Able to develop. Is it muscle memory, ie weights you were able to lift before transition?
Double bodyweight on a deadlift Is not bad at all....I notice the upper body numbers as you said are lower and this Is typical of female bodybuilders I've known...ie they can squat 300 at 160 lbs bw but are benching maybe 160....

It does make me think, as there are genetic women out there who aren't on steroids yet do build some decent amount of muscle and strength despite Low testosterone levels.

That you able to do all that lifting and run 20 miles a week Is impressive. I am way more towards the weights and sprints side of training. Am about 165 at 5-7. I plan to liposuction out the waist a bit as don't want to diet too hard and flatten out my butt. We all have our ideas of beauty and myself I like round glutes so want to keep and develop this more.

If you don't mind me asking what hrt are you doing?  From what I'm gathering, a low moderate dose of estrogen may give some nice effects without shutting down the possibility of holding onto muscle and being relativity strong.

I've been on HRT since Jan 2015 on a pretty high dose of spiro and a normal dose of estrogen although I have recently increased the estrogen up to what is generally the max dose.  My testosterone has been undetectable for 18 months and on my last blood test my estradiol level was 137 pg/ml 16 hours after my last dose so I'm assuming it stays kind of high most of the time.  Before HRT my testosterone was pretty high.

I have lifted weights before, but not that much since I was running marathons instead.  So I've never ever really lifted more than a few months at a time.

My best lifts before were:
Deadlift: 385 lbs but that was 25 years ago.  It was 305 in 2013
Bench: 225 lbs 25 years ago and 165 in 2013
Squat was 225 in 2013.
Row was 160 and overhead press was 110 in 2013.

I'm also smaller now than I was then.  25 years ago and in 2013 I was around 185 lbs, now I'm 170 lbs.  I'm still the same height at 5'11".  I'm old too (58), LOL, which doesn't make this any easier.

I think there is some muscle memory involved and I'm also intermittent fasting every day which is supposed to raise HGH dramatically.  But I also think that testosterone may not be as critical to strength development as is commonly believed.  There are other factors at work, particularly at the neurological level.

Another thing I think that really is the reason most women are dramatically weaker is because their workouts suck and they never really challenge themselves.  Their strength is a self fulfilling prophecy.  They believe they are supposed to be weak and so remain weak. The ones that do train hard inevitably get strong, or fast depending on their sport.

There was a woman I worked with a couple of years ago, much smaller and lighter than me, that competed nationally as an Olympic Lifter.  She deadlifted over 300 too.  Her example motivated me to get back into this.  I was also feeling a deadness and lack of spring in my legs when running that took all the fun out of it.  The spring is coming back.

[Charlie Nicki]

Charlie Nikki, yeah I think I read about her. It is good for there to be more transwomen coming out and being open that they are sporty. For me, it took so long to get beyond the fact I have masculine facial features and have significant muscle development to accept I'm Transgendered.

The one I'm talking about is not famous, nor a professsional player so you probably heard about somebody else. But there's definitely several trans women who enjoy being strong and muscular.

Genetic women who are muscly are not less female. So Girls like Me who like to lift should not feel less trans female.

I agree with this.

[Alexa Ares]

I've been on HRT since Jan 2015 on a pretty high dose of spiro and a normal dose of estrogen although I have recently increased the estrogen up to what is generally the max dose.  My testosterone has been undetectable for 18 months and on my last blood test my estradiol level was 137 pg/ml 16 hours after my last dose so I'm assuming it stays kind of high most of the time.  Before HRT my testosterone was pretty high.

I have lifted weights before, but not that much since I was running marathons instead.  So I've never ever really lifted more than a few months at a time.

My best lifts before were:
Deadlift: 385 lbs but that was 25 years ago.  It was 305 in 2013
Bench: 225 lbs 25 years ago and 165 in 2013
Squat was 225 in 2013.
Row was 160 and overhead press was 110 in 2013.

I'm also smaller now than I was then.  25 years ago and in 2013 I was around 185 lbs, now I'm 170 lbs.  I'm still the same height at 5'11".  I'm old too (58), LOL, which doesn't make this any easier.

I think there is some muscle memory involved and I'm also intermittent fasting every day which is supposed to raise HGH dramatically.  But I also think that testosterone may not be as critical to strength development as is commonly believed.  There are other factors at work, particularly at the neurological level.

Another thing I think that really is the reason most women are dramatically weaker is because their workouts suck and they never really challenge themselves.  Their strength is a self fulfilling prophecy.  They believe they are supposed to be weak and so remain weak. The ones that do train hard inevitably get strong, or fast depending on their sport.

There was a woman I worked with a couple of years ago, much smaller and lighter than me, that competed nationally as an Olympic Lifter.  She deadlifted over 300 too.  Her example motivated me to get back into this.  I was also feeling a deadness and lack of spring in my legs when running that took all the fun out of it.  The spring is coming back.

Thanks for the detailed reply. Totally agree many genetic women train with a lack of intensity to lift heavy. Those that do succeed. Strength yes I feel there is some clear neurological factor. Have seen 180lb men outlift 230lb beats.
You are quite the athlete to do weights with long distance and still make some decent strength gains.

For me, I would hope to hold onto muscle particularly glutes and shoulders. It's not just strength I want to keep buy actual development.

As we as trans women challenge perceived ideas of gender and identity, we should aim to be true to ourselves. I may not be Janae Krockowski but I am still a lifter.