When did you start presenting your desired gender?

[IamJoannaAndJohn]

2nd month into HRT is when i began wearing tight sexy unisex outfits and i timed this with my slow and steady weight loss. now 3 months and counting into HRT and still slimming down (goal is 140lbs/63.5kg) and already im full time wearing make ups and undergarments and really edging it outfits.

my workplace did warn me not to crossdress....out of respect for how people might treat me there. it's not like they'll fire me if i do......but they don't want any mess

i did experience the 'RUSH'  and i must say, reflecting upon it now, it's stupid. it was just the ego nagging ......i'm guilty of it .......and still am

[Eryn T]

If hiding behind my mask still counts as 'presenting' (cause I'm wearing girl clothes and bras and stuff in public) then I'd say about a few weeks after I thought I might be transgender.

I definitely rushed into things, but I think the pacing worked best for me; I've gotta take Makeup a bit slower while I work on my technique, but once I am comfortable with how I do that, the mask is coming off, baby!

[Amaki]

I cant say I didnt cross dress or even think about it because I did (mostly when I was younger (the thoughts still cross my mind)) my current home life is not a very supporting environment (I still live at home and even though they dont know my folks well my dad is against everything Im trying to be so Im working on trying to get out so I can open up and be comfortable). I have done a few things to make me feel better, like getting my ears pierced (the only piercings I ever wanted) and I'm doing everything in my power to stop biting my nails (I even started wearing gloves (in my room) to help when I get the urge lol)

It depends on how comfortable you feel, if youre in a supporting environment then open up, if your not small things that make you feel better is the way to go.

[RobynD]

For many years I stubbornly held on to the belief that I was simply a feminine leaning male, or as I learned more non-binary etc. I finally accepted that I am indeed a woman with the help of years of therapy and stopped resisting it. I wore women's underwear for most of my adult life, I had lots of fairly unisex clothes and male clothes that looked more on the feminine spectrum.

This epiphany occurred about October 2014, I immediately started presenting more feminine but still within my sort of urban tomboy style and started growing my hair out. By Dec 14 most of my male clothes were gone and I came out to my spouse and others. I started t-blockers in Feb 2015 and hormones a few months later. Socially I had already transitioned to my friends and began using my name.

Why the moving fast? I felt like I had my actual life to lead and felt like pulling off the band-aid quick was the best strategy for me. I think we all have different timelines and reasoning and I think we sometimes slow things down or speed them up from the original intention.

[DustKitten]

I'm not planning to present full-time for at least a year, but I've been out to my closest friends for two years, and these days all but one of my friends knows (and the only reason that one doesn't is because I just met him. I'll probably tell him soon-ish). I'm worried about losing my job if I'm outed at work, and my body's obviously masculine, so in public or at work I present as androgynous-male, which has been my style for 4+ years now. I wear makeup in public sometimes, but while still presenting as male; I'll wear girl jeans or shirts, jewelry, etc., but because it all has a vaguely gothic-punk look to it and it's still only an androgynous look, people tend to think it's cool rather than looking me as a cross-dresser or trans person. So, that's my compromise between being myself and feeling safe in public. I don't wear skirts outside but I do dress in girl-mode at home or at friend's houses if I'm in the mood for it or just feeling extra-dysphoric that day.

[Donna]

March 1 2018 and after thinking in December I would never pass I just said he'll with it.
I'm fine with my look and why worry about what other think. I'm just me everyday all day long

[HappyMoni]

The sooner one starts a journey, the sooner one gets where you want to be. I thought the awkward "just starting phase" was hard. I wanted it over as quickly as possible because I am highly binary. I would hope that the "no reason to hurry" approach is not the fear speaking. It is legitimate to be afraid. If I were to suggest an approach it would probably be to take things a bit at a time. Challenge yourself at times, but when you need to give yourself a break, do so. Let's face it, there will not be a time later in your life when transition will be without fear or risk. Let me say that, as someone looking from the 'post' side of transition, life is pretty awesome living in the right gender. I think you are gonna like it. Oh, try not to compare yourself to others and their journeys. They earn theirs and you will earn yours.

[Kendra]

I don't have a single date for this because my definition of desired gender changed over time.  Not because I was undecided (although I was previously), but because I decided to break transition into more manageable pieces and slide along a gender spectrum.  I switched to women's' jeans and had my eyebrows shaped during facial electrolysis two years before making more comprehensive changes.  For other clothing choices and hair style I went for colors and shapes that are more gender neutral.  I put up with a few odd looks but didn't care as I was working on things far more important than the opinion of a few that were clueless.  Several times for about a year, people I had just met asked if I was in a band.  And I said yes, how did you know?

My personal definition of desired gender continues to change.  I had GCS before carrying a purse on a regular basis.  Never tried female perfume, haven't had painted fingernails yet.

[Liv_J]

For many years I stubbornly held on to the belief that I was simply a feminine leaning male, or as I learned more non-binary etc.

That sounds familiar to me... I've spent years trying alternatives to just accepting I'm a woman; I think it just seemed too rare and difficult to be trans when I started out in this journey of thinking about my gender, a long time ago, and various things set me back or discouraged me. For a long time I also decided I was non-binary, but at the moment I just want to transition to female and just stop repressing my femininity (and my female sexuality) and see how I settle.

I do know I've compromised and repressed a lot, and would like to finally not do that. Maybe I will be a slightly non-binary or tomboyish woman, or maybe not. I was surprised and pleased when I spent a weekend with LGBT friends in a female mode last year and I asked a lesbian friend how I came across that weekend and she said very feminine, and classy and you pass well. It was a bit of a shock, but a nice one. Maybe she was being nice, but I think maybe especially once I start on the hormones I might turn out to be a pretty average woman really. I don't think, if I had just been assigned female, I would have spent years pondering about gender.

[kaitylynn]

When I came out to my boss, I started to shift things into a more androgynous state.  I started HRT a month later and chose to start being addressed by my correct name at that point.  By Oct 2016, my legal information was officially corrected and I shifted EVERYTHING.  The year on HRT had changed enough to get me to 50/50 when being gendered and it was apparent that I was closer to correct than where I started from.

My therapist started the RLE counter for me at the point she knew my information had been officially affirmed correct (Dec 2016) because that is when I felt in agreement that the time actually had arrived.

[RaiJaxO]

I knew I was a boy as soon as I knew the distinction between genders and my life was like a game of musical closets after that. I found out that trans peple exist when I was maybe 8, I had already been presenting myself as male but didn't think much of it since it was just the way it was for me, but around 11 I was so worn down from the bullying that I rejected my identity and went back in the closet. I didn't come out again til 20 at which time I presented as male shortly but that same year due to living circumstances I had to go in again and didn't emerge til I was 23. I'll tell ya, it messed me up for a while finally freeing myself at age 20 only to lock myself away again and I was scared to come back out again after that in case the same cycle repeated itself. Luckily it hasn't this time . but yeah, there's no rush. Do it when you feel ready and if you're in a place in life where you know that you can safely

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