Coming out to parents

[anthony_2019]

Hi,

I am ftm (mid-twenties, non-anglophone country) and came out to my sister today where everything went well!

Also, I sent a letter to my parents on Friday, so it should be arriving tmrw (Monday) or on Tuesday. However, regarding my parents I am very worried (!) about them not accepting how I feel; telling me to  ``be crazy" and that they have been supporting me throughout my studies etc. and "then that".

There have been hours in these past few days where I have been thinking - "what have I done" - "how did I dare doing that"/"have I taken leave of my senses" (sending of the letter and opening up). In a way I think it was the right thing to do, though it feels so unreal and I am scared of their (possible) negative reaction. I just feel like I have lost control. I know that I did the right thing but I "lost control" I cannot retrieve the letter (back). Has anyone of you ever experienced this feeling? It is just very uncomfortable.

[Northern Star Girl]

Hi,

I am ftm (mid-twenties, non-anglophone country) and came out to my sister today where everything went well!

Also, I sent a letter to my parents on Friday, so it should be arriving tmrw (Monday) or on Tuesday. However, regarding my parents I am very worried (!) about them not accepting how I feel; telling me to  ``be crazy" and that they have been supporting me throughout my studies etc. and "then that".

There have been hours in these past few days where I have been thinking - "what have I done" - "how did I dare doing that"/"have I taken leave of my senses" (sending of the letter and opening up). In a way I think it was the right thing to do, though it feels so unreal and I am scared of their (possible) negative reaction. I just feel like I have lost control. I know that I did the right thing but I "lost control" I cannot retrieve the letter (back). Has anyone of you ever experienced this feeling? It is just very uncomfortable.

@anthony_2019   
Dear Anthony:
    Thank you for becoming a member of Susan's Place and the Forums and for your very first posting in the Forums.

    As you post here on the forums you will be able to exchange thoughts and comments with others that are experiencing many of the same things that you are.

    This is the right place for you to be to find out what others may have to say that may have been in your circumstances and with your questions and concerns.
    There are a lot of members here that will be able to identify with your situation as you continue to feel free to share it.

    I also want to warmly WELCOME you to Susan's Place. 
You will find this a safe and friendly place to share with others and to read about others similar trials, tribulations, and successes.

    As you are certainly aware you can share with others and involve yourself with some give and take with other like-minded members.  When frustrated or if you have successes you can share it here if you wish and receive support from others and offer support to others. ....
     ***There is a very good chance that you might find that you will make some new like-minded friends here. 

    Please come in and continue to be involved at your own pace.
   
    I have attached important and informative LINKS that will help you to navigate around the Forums and will allow you to enjoy the features here.     
Please look closely at the LINKS in RED, answers are there to many questions that new members ask.

Again, Welcome to Susan's Place.
Danielle

Here are some links to the site rules and stuff that all new members should be familiar with:
 

Things that you should read

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[Northern Star Girl]

@anthony_2019 
Oh, and another thing Anthony...
Please plan to find your way to the Introductions Forum to tell us about yourself so that more members will be aware of your arrival.
     
Thank you again for coming to Susan's Place and being involved in the Forums here.
Best wishes to you,
Danielle

NOTE:  Now that all of this greeting stuff is done, I will let you have the thread back so you can continue to pursue the conversation that you were trying to have.

[930310]

A letter is in my opinion not the best option to come out. It won't answer any eventual questions that your parents might have after reading it. If you feel insecure, bring your sibling to support you when you talk with your parents.

[anthony_2019]

A reason for writing the letter is that I am studying at a place which is further away from home.

In addition, my mums reaction might be over-impulsive if I told her directly and I want her to have some time thinking about it/processing it after she read it. That is why I could not do it in person. Questions will come whether I write or don't write a letter.

[930310]

You will however not be able to answer those questions in person immediately after they read your letter. It's also pretty unpersonal to just send a letter.
I'm speaking from my own experience from coming out in person. My mother was thankful that I spoke to her about it rather than doing it unnecessarily complex. She wasn't overwhelmingly supportive about it and my dad was even less so but at least I got it out in the open.