thank you everyone for reading the post but im basically ending the thread here, i realize that it seems a bit childish to end the conversation and topic at this point but the advice and opinions i was looking for arent there for me.
Some responses are very useful and insightful, but most offer a point of view that simply is impossible for me to follow or do. If i had another choice i would have taken it but alas, i dont. Im extremely limited in options at the moment and i rather try something despite its potential risks than do nothing because thats what i have been doing my entire life.
I know it can be scary to think of risks and consequences but thats what ive been dealing with my entire life. I take risks every single day literally when i drive to work on my motorcycle. Ive had two people i know die in accidents; simple health risks dont scare me at all or bother me at all. Yes i know that messing with the endocrine system is dangerous, yes i know that its not a good idea. But my choices are continue to do nothing or doing something in general. For some people the pros simply outweigh the cons.
The idea of using online doctors was a good one, going to local ones, which there are none, is a terrible idea because where i live, again, has a terribly high discrimination rate vs trans, and most doctors are extremely catholic. I have tried this before.
Its been a pleasure and this is probably the last post i'll ever make on this site because im going to go try and find people in a similar situation as mine to see how they dealt with it. It was a mistake of mine to try to find advice from people with way different circumstances that i have. I apologize if anyone is ofended, as thats not my intention, its just a difference of culture and location. I also apologize if you feel i have wasted your time.
Once again thank you all for your opinions and valuable advice, i hope to come back with a good story someday for everyone on how i got past this.
Bye bye
MarceZ
