Introduction-Long time coming

[Josie 41]

Hello All,

I have lurked here for years just hoping to learn what it feels like to be a woman.  I have pondered this question for years.  It fills me with much joy to read so many successful transitions.  I have hung on every word while you ladies discussed sore breasts, growing hips (fat redistribution), noticing colors and smells were much more vibrant, the pleasure of taking off your bra but the peace that it brings to you to need one and the joys of the panties fitting correctly.

I hit the jackpot when it came to wives.  She approved and preferred the female me to the male  (she was bi);  often buying me an outfit or a new bra or a new nightgown.  She would have loved for me to transition in order to live out our days as a same-sex couple.  But life got in the way and in August, she passed away from fibrous sarcoma.  She fought the disease hard, but now she's beyond its reach.  She has reached out to me from her side saying that she's happy and can't wait for my arrival.  I hope that she's patient as I may be awhile. 

But Josie's greatest supporter is now gone; it was an honor to be her spouse.  I'd have loved to spend our retirement years as her wife. But my life is not about me, rather it is about the people around me.  It is my intention to make it through my time on earth without NEEDING to transition.  For me, it is a want not a need and I don't want my friends and family to pay the price.  That is my opinion on my situation, definitely not a judgement on anyone else. 

From what I have read, Susan's is a very positive, open, yet honest place.  I wish everyone safety and peace.

Thank you,

Josie

[Lori Dee ✅]

Hello Josie,

I'm Lori Dee. Welcome to Susan's Place!

Thank you for the introduction, and my condolences for your loss.

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@Josie 41 
@Sarah B
@Northern Star Girl

[Pema]

Josie, welcome, and thank you for joining us here. I'm honored that you would choose to become a member of our family.

I'm so very sorry about your wife's illness and passing. I know nothing can fill the void she has left in your life. I hope you'll find peace and joy in the love of your family and friends. And I hope we can bring some comfort to your life, too.

With love,
Pema

[Sarah B ✅]

Hi Josie

My name is Sarah and I would also like to formally, Welcome you to Susan's Place!

I see that other members of Susan's have also welcomed you as well.

Thank you for sharing something so personal.  I am very sorry for the loss of your wife.  Losing someone who loved you so openly leaves an ache that words never quite reach, yet it is clear that the bond you shared was extraordinary.  Her support, her encouragement, the joy she took in seeing you as yourself speak volumes about the kind of love you both created together.  It was an honour for you to be her spouse and it sounds like it was an honour for her to walk beside you too.

You also wrote with such tenderness about the years you spent here quietly learning.  The way you described finding joy in others journeys, the small discoveries, the colours, the sensations, the comfort and peace that clothing can bring show a gentle reflective heart that fits in very naturally here.

Your desire to care for the people around you, your clarity about your own needs, your intention to move forward in a way that protects those you love these are meaningful strengths.  There is room here for many paths including yours.  Wanting something without needing it does not make your feelings any less real.

Susan's is indeed a supportive thoughtful space.  I hope you continue to find warmth here and that you feel safe to speak whenever you choose.  May peace find you in your grief and may the memories of your wife continue to bring light as you move through each day.

You are welcome here Josie.

Once you feel comfortable here, it would be appreciated if you add a little bit more about yourself in the other forums and threads.  I would appreciate it very much as, I'm always interested in learning something new about new members.

In addition members of Susan's will more than likely will discuss problems or issues that are similar to yours as most have experienced these issues as well.

Please keep in mind when posting that this is an ALL AGES PUBLIC Forum and the internet never forgets.  Do not post anything that you do not want to be made public.

Take care and all the best for the future.

Once again, Welcome to Susan's Place!

Best Wishes Always
Sarah B
Global Moderator
@Devlyn  @Jessica_Rose  @Mariah  @Northern Star Girl  @Lori Dee
@Josie 41

[tgirlamg]

Welcome to the fold Josie!

I am so sorry about your wife's passing and wish you blessings and all good things as you navigate your way forward! 🌻

Onward!

Ashley 💕

[Alana Ashleigh]

Hi Josie, glad you're here.

Alana

[Dances With Trees]

Welcome, Josie! And heartfelt condolences for your loss. Your perspective regarding the needs of others resonates with my own experience. I suspended HRT in part because of the effect it was having on my daughter and my sisters. One of whom pleaded with me to wait 'until my next life' to 'become a woman.' And, like you, my variance is more of a want than a need. But I do so miss those days when all the colors were so much brighter and I was often giddy with the awareness of how much more alive I felt.