Susan's Place Logo
Main Menu

Careful what you ask for

Started by Jillian-TG, December 15, 2025, 03:42:08 PM

Previous topic - Next topic

0 Members and 4 Guests are viewing this topic.

Print
Go Down Pages 1 2
User actions

ChrissyRyan

#20
Today at 11:43:04 AM
It is probably correct to say that most heterosexual CIS women would not prefer a partner who is MTF or a cross dresser.  I have no data to support that but it seems to be correct.

It is a different matter completely to say this should not be the case.  It would be nice if acceptance is the case, or specifically, in any one specific case that involves a MTF or cross dresser and the partner.

If you can achieve a lasting breakthrough, a truly accepting relationship with crossdressing or as a MTF, that would be great for you.

This sounds as if mutual counseling may be helpful.  However she may not wish it. 

I wish you the best result of all of this.  Maybe there can be an effective solution.






Always stay cheerful, be polite, kind, and understanding. Accepting yourself as the woman you are is very liberating.  Never underestimate the appreciation and respect of authenticity.  Help connect a person to someone that may be able to help that person.  Be brave, be strong.  A TRUE friend is a treasure.  Relationships are very important, people are important, and the sooner we all realize that the better off the world will be.  Try a little kindness.  Be generous with your time, energy, wisdom, and resources.   Inconvenience yourself to help someone.   I am a brown eyed, brown haired woman. 
  •  
    The following users thanked this post: Lori Dee

Pema

#21
Today at 01:23:00 PM
I'm so sorry, Jillian. I guess I'd appreciate the clarity about where she really is with it all, but that that wouldn't make it any easier to adjust to it.

I find this part:

Quote from: Jillian-TG on Today at 10:52:05 AMI value that side of my personality as more important than her or her feelings.

a bit disturbing. I don't see it at all as "a side of your personality." It is fundamentally who you are. And "her feelings" are hers; you don't control them, only she can. So this statement from her feels like a very false equivalence that reads to me in essence as "I value my emotional comfort above your right to be authentic."

But that's me. I know you'll find your footing and figure out what is best for you. We will be here to support you along the way.

Love,
Pema
"Though we travel the world over to find the beautiful, we must carry it with us or we find it not." - Ralph Waldo Emerson
  •  
    The following users thanked this post: Lori Dee

Jillian-TG

#22
Today at 04:30:48 PM
Quote from: Pema on Today at 01:23:00 PMI'm so sorry, Jillian. I guess I'd appreciate the clarity about where she really is with it all, but that that wouldn't make it any easier to adjust to it.

I find this part:

a bit disturbing. I don't see it at all as "a side of your personality." It is fundamentally who you are. And "her feelings" are hers; you don't control them, only she can. So this statement from her feels like a very false equivalence that reads to me in essence as "I value my emotional comfort above your right to be authentic."

But that's me. I know you'll find your footing and figure out what is best for you. We will be here to support you along the way.

Love,
Pema
The part that you highlighted is the part that bothers me a lot. This isn't a preference for me because if I could choose then I sure as heck wouldn't choose the path of drama and trouble. Ironically we have discussed that aspect before and I really thought she understood that aspect. We discussed it on our most recent vacation and she literally had tears in her eyes as I explained myself and how I wished I was not this way. I thought I saw the penny drop and she actually understood...

But maybe it's simply information overload for her as she digests things, so what resonates one day and is understood, becomes forgotten the next day.
Print
Go Up Pages 1 2
User actions