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Charlotte's scratch post

Started by Charlotte Kitty, January 02, 2026, 12:57:20 PM

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Lori Dee

Because your body was responding to something new.

I had the same experience. Started with a little growth at about three months. After that, the growth continued, but I couldn't see it or even measure it. That was because the glands deep in the fatty tissue were developing. At two years, I was very frustrated. The only real evidence I could point to was that my hormone levels were still not within the proper range.

I argued with my Endocrinologist constantly. I read studies, did my own research, and came back to her with a stack of papers for her to read. My GP (with 40 years' experience in Family Medicine) suggested that I might be a fast metabolizer. For some medications, my body processes and eliminates them very quickly. They can't do their job if they are not in the bloodstream.

We had already switched from pills to patches because the pills were not raising my levels enough. They kept increasing my dose and I was wearing three patches at a time and changing the weekly patches twice a week to compensate.

We changed the T-blockers from Spiro and Finasteride to leuprolide and bicalutamide. It seemed the higher T levels were competing and keeping my E from getting where it needed to be. It wasn't enough.

That was when we switched to injectables. After six months on Leuprolide and bical, plus injectable E, the tables turned. T was suppressed, and my E levels moved up where they needed to be. After a year of T-levels <12 on my labs, it appeared the E was suppressing the T, so I stopped the leuprolide and bicalutamide.

I have been on injectables for a little over two years with my T fully suppressed and E levels where they need to be. In the past six months, my breasts have again started to grow. Not quickly, barely measurable. But the growth is there.

Hormones are very complex substances, so adding one affects all the others. The body responds to changes. Over time, the body learns that this is the new "normal," so changes slow down a little. They are still happening, just not dramatically so. Teenage girls seem to grow breasts very quickly and within a few years suddenly have hips and soft skin too. After that, their changes tend to slow down, but they don't stop. Eventually, they reach the point their genetics say they should, and it becomes maintenance after that.

I hope this helps you understand a little better why things happen at the rate they do. Every body is different, from genetics to metabolism, and even sensitivity to various substances (not just hormones). I kept logs of my measurements, weight, lab results, and dosages. That helped me track what worked and what didn't. I know you don't have access to the medical care as I do, so it is even more important to pay attention to what is really happening.

Don't get frustrated (although I know that is very hard), but try to figure out what is going on. Are your T-levels too high? E levels should be ok now. Once everything is set, maintain it for three months, then check again. Adjust as needed, then wait another three months to see what changed. If you make changes too quickly, your body can't figure out what it is supposed to be doing. Just relax and let it happen.

My Life is Based on a True Story <-- The Story of Lori
The Story of Lori, Chapter 2
Veteran U.S. Army - SSG (Staff Sergeant) - M60A3 Tank Master Gunner
2017 - GD Diagnosis / 2019- 2nd Diagnosis / 2020 - HRT / 2022 - FFS & Legal Name Change
/ 2024 - Voice Training / 2025 - Passport & IDs complete - Started Electrolysis!

An ancient prayer:
"King Zeus, grant us the good things, whether we pray for them or not, and keep from us the bad things, even if we pray for them."

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Devlyn

Could the phytoestrogens in all those peanuts have been competing with the estradiol?

Charlotte Kitty

Thanks Lori and Devlyn. I only used peanut butter for about 4 weeks and thats when i got slight growth after months of nothing. Maybe my body needs fat but struggles to get it?

I doubt T is the issues as all my tests from the very first have T below 1 nmol/l. I'm typically 0.4-0.7 nmol/l T which is lower female range. E was in range most of the time around 350-400pmol/l. I'm thinking my body may need higher than others do. I'm now trough at about 580pmol/l so over 1000 most of the week in reality. Maybe cyproterone acetate is the problem? Do i go mono in a few months and see?

My regimes in terms of doses were never low or unusual. But then I take most meds and have few side effects. I feel like my body resists outside influences and changes strongly to survive. Maybe this resilience also counters effects that I want.
Pansexual, fully feminine presenting.  Engaged in open relationship.17 months HRT.
🔗 [Link: tickerfactory.com]

Lori Dee

Quote from: Charlotte Kitty on September 17, 2026, 12:57:23 PMMaybe cyproterone acetate is the problem? Do i go mono in a few months and see?

I am not convinced of that, and I am no doctor. CPA works similarly to what the leuprolide/bicalutamide combo did for me. It reduces T production, blocks the androgen receptors, and has the bonus of working as a progestin. In my case, I had to add progesterone because leuprolide/bical do not have that bonus.

From what you are saying, your T is sufficiently suppressed, and your E is sufficiently elevated. I wouldn't change anything without a doctor reviewing your labs first. It looks to me as though you are at the place you need to be, so keep it there for six months and see if anything changes. Maybe within that period, you can get in to see a doctor who can look at labs and make suggested changes or no change at all.

Try not to get impatient. You are doing the work, and it will pay off. It just takes time to get there.

My Life is Based on a True Story <-- The Story of Lori
The Story of Lori, Chapter 2
Veteran U.S. Army - SSG (Staff Sergeant) - M60A3 Tank Master Gunner
2017 - GD Diagnosis / 2019- 2nd Diagnosis / 2020 - HRT / 2022 - FFS & Legal Name Change
/ 2024 - Voice Training / 2025 - Passport & IDs complete - Started Electrolysis!

An ancient prayer:
"King Zeus, grant us the good things, whether we pray for them or not, and keep from us the bad things, even if we pray for them."

HELP US HELP YOU!
Please consider becoming a Subscriber.
Donations accepted at: https://www.paypal.com/paypalme/SusanElizabethLarson 🔗
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Stottie Girl

Charlotte, I think the main problem is you keep chopping and changing your regime. You never give it time to deliver results before you are changeing from pills, to gel, to patches, to injections from normal doses to extreme doses. You really do need professional guidance because it seems that no matter what we say you just won't give it the time it needs to take effect. The human body simply will not grow breasts on the timescales you are demanding, it takes time.

I do have large breasts but it has taken me years and years to get here. I struggle to rememember exactly when I started getting large but I do remember I was stuck at C cup for a couple of years at least. Your body will develop or it won't, not every woman is meant to have big boobs. They are not any less of a woman if they don't.

I took Cyproterone early on and it did not have a negative impact on my breast growth. It's time that is the missing ingredient here. I know you don't want to hear that but it's the truth. As Lori says you can't expect a teenage girl to go from flat chested to huge mature boobs in 1 or 2 years.
A wise man once said don't judge a man until you've walked a mile in his shoes, that way when you judge him you're a mile away and you have his shoes!

Never trust a man who, when left alone in a room with a tea cozy, doesn't try it on - Billy Connolley

Charlotte Kitty

I'm going to just try and forget about my transition for a while. It'll be tough but think its my best option. My plan is to persue a feminine body and presentation, but mentally I'm detransitioning. By not identifying as a woman the pressure is already feeling far less. I'll try to align my mind with my body rather than the other way. Hopefully then everything will eventually be in cohesion.
Pansexual, fully feminine presenting.  Engaged in open relationship.17 months HRT.
🔗 [Link: tickerfactory.com]

Charlotte Kitty

So looking forwatd to getting today out of the way. Tomorrow is Birmingham trans pride and I'm volunteering, though it'll simply be helping make sure the demonstration goes ok.

Unfortunately because of last weeks fur meet and trans pride I've missed 2 weeks legs, bums and tums where I met that lovely group if ladies. I decided to move a tattoo appointment I had next Saturday, as didn't want to miss another. This is the first time I've ever been invited to join such a group in my life, don't want it to go sour. Also missed last weeks and this weeks midweek sessions because of my bf locking himself out and then Wednesday having to work and not get home until 11pm. I just want to be back on track really.

Pansexual, fully feminine presenting.  Engaged in open relationship.17 months HRT.
🔗 [Link: tickerfactory.com]

Petunia

Charlotte, I think getting back into a regular pattern with women's exercise is the best thing you can do for yourself.

Your body is probably working along in the background (providing you stick to one course of action) but in the meantime you need to feed your mind.

The more time you can spend in women's groups doing things to make your women's body stronger the better you'll feel and the better long term health.

My hope is one day I'm accepted in groups like that where I am actually just one of the girls.

PS that dress looks so good on you
And then one day you stop to find,
10 years have got behind you,
no one told you when to run,
you missed the starting gun
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Courtney G

Quote from: Stottie Girl on September 17, 2026, 04:33:29 PMCharlotte, I think the main problem is you keep chopping and changing your regime. You never give it time to deliver results before you are changeing from pills, to gel, to patches, to injections from normal doses to extreme doses. You really do need professional guidance because it seems that no matter what we say you just won't give it the time it needs to take effect. The human body simply will not grow breasts on the timescales you are demanding, it takes time.

I agree with Sarah. Charlotte, you wrote something like "I ate a lot of peanut butter for a month and nothing changed."  Reading that helped me to understand you a little better. If you'd said "I changed my diet and exercise routine and I don't see any changes after a year," that would be different.


Look, we wait decades to do something about our gender incongruence then get frustrated if we don't have a female-shaped body in 3 years. As Lori pointed out, it simply doesn't work that way. Breasts are 4-7 years, body shape 5-10. Very frustrating, I know, but we can't will it to be otherwise. Of course, there are surgeries for the impatient and well-funded...

🔗 [Link: tickerfactory.com]

Facial feminization surgery: March 4th, 2026

Charlotte Kitty

Hi Petunia,
I really want to get back to classes but life got in the way a bit with stuff booked long ago and my bf. But next Saturday I'm back.

I don't do it for fitness anymore. It's purely for social and mental health reasons tbh. Its the only thing that really makes me feel good these days! I just have to run with what works now and accept Charlotte has a totally different idea of passtimes to the old me!

Hi Courtney,
Unless i grow 2 sizes by February I'm getting 400cc augmentation at same time as GRS. I'm currently wearing a 3x booster bra and this is the first time im happy with the size. That takes me to about DD to DDD in size.

I'm so confident that I'd never have achieved that naturally, that if I naturally grow just 2 more sizes by my 4 year HRT anniversary, I'll donate £200 to a local LGBTQ charity. Obviously I'll have to monitor up to BA and then after. But I'll put on my blog. Caveat: I'm still enployed and not in financial hardship! It'll be less then, but I would still honour something.

Charlotte

@Petunia @Courtney G
Pansexual, fully feminine presenting.  Engaged in open relationship.17 months HRT.
🔗 [Link: tickerfactory.com]

Stottie Girl

BUT again, you still aren't giving it enough time. What actually happens if you get the boob job and then you also get your natural development on top? Does it cause a weird shape? Does it mean you have to have the implants removed? Genuinely curious.

I've never met anyone quite like you Charlotte, your extreme lack of patience and single minded strong will drives you on at a phenomenal rate! I don't mean that in a bad way. When you really want something there is no stopping you is there.
A wise man once said don't judge a man until you've walked a mile in his shoes, that way when you judge him you're a mile away and you have his shoes!

Never trust a man who, when left alone in a room with a tea cozy, doesn't try it on - Billy Connolley

Charlotte Kitty

Quote from: Stottie Girl on Yesterday at 11:40:19 AMBUT again, you still aren't giving it enough time. What actually happens if you get the boob job and then you also get your natural development on top? Does it cause a weird shape? Does it mean you have to have the implants removed? Genuinely curious.

I've never met anyone quite like you Charlotte, your extreme lack of patience and single minded strong will drives you on at a phenomenal rate! I don't mean that in a bad way. When you really want something there is no stopping you is there.

I've already considered that as thought the same myself. I'm expecting maybe 1 cup increase naturally. The implant will go beneath the muscle in my case. Gives slightly less boost, but allows future growth without any ill effects. At 400cc under muscle I'll be just under 2 cups boost. I'm expecting between D and at most DDD if indeed I did grow naturally 2 cup sizes. Those are all very workable. I very much doubt I'd naturally grow 3 cup sizes in these latter phases, so most likely wont be hitting E+

All of the sources I've read suggest that more than 2 cup size growth is unlikely after the initial growth phase. This being the first 12-18 months. I agree I may gain some growth up to year 5, but i don't see 2 full cups as likely. Most likely some filling out up to D at most is my prediction.

I don't stop as right now I have money. I'm highly overpaid. This situation won't last so I'll move fast. I'll worry about later life if / when it comes.

Charlotte ❤️
Pansexual, fully feminine presenting.  Engaged in open relationship.17 months HRT.
🔗 [Link: tickerfactory.com]
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Stottie Girl

But you aren't really in the latter phases Charlotte. I'm 3-5 years down the line and they are still growing. You cannot know for sure where your development will end up at this early a stage.

I just got a Sculptresse Estel bra in a 40GG and it fits like a glove, but when I started out I figured a B cup or C cup similar to my mum was where I would end up. There are no other women in my family with large breasts apart from one Aunt but I am way past her in terms of pure volume now. I'm not saying that to boast I'm saying my expectations turned out to be totally wrong. I have a large collection of bras (I haven't forgotten that I promised you them by the way!) that I built up in C and D cups that show just how long I was stuck in smaller sizes. I certainly did not get rapid growth and suddenly became large, they have just steadily grown bigger over time (there's that word again 😉).

It's a tricky one to be sure, for me, I have never been in a position where I could afford to get a boob job so I had no decision to make, had I had the money, I might have been tempted when I was smaller. I can totally understand why you want to do it. If that will give you the body image you crave then I would say it's money well spent.
A wise man once said don't judge a man until you've walked a mile in his shoes, that way when you judge him you're a mile away and you have his shoes!

Never trust a man who, when left alone in a room with a tea cozy, doesn't try it on - Billy Connolley

Charlotte Kitty

As i cant post those kind of pictures I don't really think anyone can appreciate how small mine actually are. I put on tight stretchy top today with no bra and I could literally pass as a male body. All of my pictures have 2-3 cup boost inserts and bras with thick padding. I try a bra with no padding i'm literally flat. When i lay down my boobs protrude less than an inch from my chest. And ive not had slow and steady growth. I had 5 months of growth then nothing. Some days they are shrunken and not round.  They are cone shaped. Even B bras have a gap around the top. Of course nothing is certain. But I see my body and on other sites I've seen many people between 6 and 12 months with much more than what I see daily in the mirror. I've yet to see anyone with anything remotely like my chest. 

I'm pretty sure I'm not imagining this, but again i cant share those kinda pics so its only my word and viewpoint to go by. Its incredibly stressful as I was literally living as a woman but neglecting every outfit that is designed to show cleavage. If ive messed up then i can deal with that. I'm a make a decision person, but if proven wrong later I'll take it on the chin - i can deal with that! I can't deal with missed opportunities as there is never a way back.

Its a really difficult thing I appreciate. But i could be dead in 5 years time.

Hugs
Charlotte ❤️
Pansexual, fully feminine presenting.  Engaged in open relationship.17 months HRT.
🔗 [Link: tickerfactory.com]
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Stottie Girl

Well they do sound like they have not progressed from stage 2 really. Odd. It has to be down to your regime instability surely?

Still, whatever the reason I think it sounds like the boob job is the right path for you. I hope that when you get them it will bring you the happiness and mental peace you deserve.
A wise man once said don't judge a man until you've walked a mile in his shoes, that way when you judge him you're a mile away and you have his shoes!

Never trust a man who, when left alone in a room with a tea cozy, doesn't try it on - Billy Connolley

Charlotte Kitty

Quote from: Stottie Girl on Yesterday at 02:10:54 PMWell they do sound like they have not progressed from stage 2 really. Odd. It has to be down to your regime instability surely?

Still, whatever the reason I think it sounds like the boob job is the right path for you. I hope that when you get them it will bring you the happiness and mental peace you deserve.


To be honest my first 12 months regime was rock solid. Titrated up from 2mg pills to 6mg pills which I held. Only started messing with it so much recently. I just think its my body. I literally don't react much to anything! And as you know my weight doesn't even change despite overeating thousands of calories. I'm  guessing it fights change. In some senses thats positive. Apart from mental illness ive never been seriously unwell. So this body is literally a fortress. But that's the whole problem trying to change it!
Pansexual, fully feminine presenting.  Engaged in open relationship.17 months HRT.
🔗 [Link: tickerfactory.com]
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Charlotte Kitty

I mentioned that I've messed a bit with high voltage and tesla coils. This is the one that zapped my nipple once. In one pic the spark is hitting the wall 2M behind it. In the other you can see the arcs hitting a sofa bed and going straight through it to the floor. That thing is scary! It uses 230V mains rectified to around 350V DC into a huge 47000uf capacitor. Four industrial IGBT transistors  invert this 350V supply as a square wave into a resonant inductor capacitor primary circuit. The resonance raises the primary current to around 900 amps at 350V which is coupled as a loose transformer to the few thousand windings of the secondary coil. This is also resonantly coupled to primary allowing voltages of several hundred thousand volts to form.

I hope someone here at least understands what I'm going on about.  Sorry if i bored you 😆





Pansexual, fully feminine presenting.  Engaged in open relationship.17 months HRT.
🔗 [Link: tickerfactory.com]

Lori Dee

Quote from: Charlotte Kitty on Yesterday at 02:31:50 PMIt uses 230V mains rectified to around 350V DC into a huge 47000uf capacitor. Four industrial IGBT transistors  invert this 350V supply as a square wave into a resonant inductor capacitor primary circuit. The resonance raises the primary current to around 900 amps at 350V which is coupled as a loose transformer to the few thousand windings of the secondary coil. This is also resonantly coupled to primary allowing voltages of several hundred thousand volts to form.

I followed it. Much of the electronic circuit work I did was using discrete components before everything was printed into an integrated circuit chip.

And yes, that thing is SCARY! But I love it.
My Life is Based on a True Story <-- The Story of Lori
The Story of Lori, Chapter 2
Veteran U.S. Army - SSG (Staff Sergeant) - M60A3 Tank Master Gunner
2017 - GD Diagnosis / 2019- 2nd Diagnosis / 2020 - HRT / 2022 - FFS & Legal Name Change
/ 2024 - Voice Training / 2025 - Passport & IDs complete - Started Electrolysis!

An ancient prayer:
"King Zeus, grant us the good things, whether we pray for them or not, and keep from us the bad things, even if we pray for them."

HELP US HELP YOU!
Please consider becoming a Subscriber.
Donations accepted at: https://www.paypal.com/paypalme/SusanElizabethLarson 🔗

Petunia

Charlotte, why did you build it?
Just for kicks or do you want to control lightening?
And then one day you stop to find,
10 years have got behind you,
no one told you when to run,
you missed the starting gun
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Charlotte Kitty

Quote from: Petunia on Today at 12:07:36 AMCharlotte, why did you build it?
Just for kicks or do you want to control lightening?

Just built it for fun really. It taught me a lot about power electronics.
Pansexual, fully feminine presenting.  Engaged in open relationship.17 months HRT.
🔗 [Link: tickerfactory.com]
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