@CosmicJoke, when you posted a similar question last year (
here), I was in a different place on this path. I'd only recognized being transgender a few months earlier and I wasn't even clear about whether I wanted to transition fully. My answer then would have been something like: Yes, I'd like to have the magic-wand treatment as a 30-day trial to see whether it put me in a place where I felt more "myself." I suppose I'd have wanted the option to continue or cancel my subscription at the 30-day mark.
Today I'm in a very different place. I've been on HRT for 4 months and I'm loving the effects so far. I still don't know whether I want to transition fully. Much of my ambivalence is about the practicality of surgeries and the everything else in my 60's. It's a considerable investment of time, energy, money, and more, and not without risk. So I'm very much a "feel my way through" and "what's the next right step" person. It's been less than a year, and I've already come a long way. It will all unfold exactly as it should.
BUT/AND...
I really feel very strongly that this entire process - being born in a male body and treated for 60+ years as a boy/man, trying to find a way to "fit in" in the world, then seeing clearly that it was time for me to change directions - it's all essential to my discovering, learning, growing as a human in this lifetime. *This is* what I came here to do, and "figuring it out" is a critical part of the experience.
Another enormous part of the experience is, as
@AlisonM so beautifully described above, finding the extraordinary community of people here who are on similar (but different!) paths. I would have missed out on so much if I had arrived on this planet already in my final form (and who does, really?).
So my answer is emphatically no. The magic wand, for me, would be skipping all of the growth for a shortcut to a perceived reward. I think the experience is the actual reward. I am profoundly grateful for every moment of it.
