The face of anti-trans violence

[Shana A]

The face of anti-trans violence
As North Texans commemorate Trans Day of Remembrance, one trans woman remembers the attack she survived as a child

Posted on 18 Nov 2010 at 7:16pm
DAVID TAFFET

To many people, statistics on anti-transgender violence are just numbers. Astounding, perhaps frightening, but still just numbers.

Warning, rape, violence triggers

http://www.dallasvoice.com/face-antitrans-violence-1053014.html

Winter Mullenix is the face of one of those numbers. One of many.

Mullenix was attacked when she was 9 years old by someone who had apparently been stalking her for a while.

"He was disgusted by my behavior. I was living as a boy, but it was obvious to everyone," she said, describing herself. "I would dance and prance and I hung out with the girls."

[Dawn D.]

Wow! What a delightful outcome to such a horrific story. Winter is both lucky to be alive and she's a real life hero.

This is also a very good lesson to all of us to watch our own backs, and the backs of our brothers and sisters alike.


Dawn

[regan]

I've been thinking this over in my head, and as much as I hate to admit it, I seriously question the validity of her sexual assault at age 9.  Read the rest of this post before you flame me, please....

The rape, as described in the article, would have likely left her unable to sit comfortably for a long time.  Did it not seem strange to her parents that she would have resisted sitting down and probably been in obvious discomfort when she did sit down until the damage healed?  As for the stabbing, the wound would have required stitches to heal properly, that part of her body would have stretched repeatedly as she moved pulling the edges of the wound apart.  Keep in mind that on the night of the attack her clothing would probably have been ripped and would definitely be bloody.  Did none of this seem strange, especially bloody underwear, to her parents?  As for the unstitched wound, not only would it be at high risk for infection but every time the unstitched wound seperated it would likely have bled into her underwear.  Again, how did all of this go unnoticed by her parents?  What about a concerned teacher?  What about any adult in her life or even a well meaning friend?

I just find it impossible to believe she was able to keep a violent sexual assault as secret as she claims she did.

[rite_of_inversion]

I think "left for dead" is a bit of hyperbole. The attacker wasn't trying to kill her.

Note that the attacker cut the skin around her tailbone, not her rectum. Which would have healed a lot easier and bled less than a ring cut around the rectum.
And all she would have had to do to not sit on the cut was sit up straight.

I suspect she probably took steps to hide the bleeding: toilet-papering herself, washing out her own underpants in the sink? it's typical for children to blame themselves and not tell anyone when they are victimized( I certainly did) and in this case, I suspect Winter did blame herself. So she would have been mortally ashamed and hid what happened.

Children actually physically (note I didn't say mentally) recover from "normal" penile or digital rape so well that it's almost impossible to tell it's happened within a day or two-even bruising is unusual, and the vaginal or anal differences caused by a history of penetration can be measured in micrometers.  This is how family members can have sex with children in their household for years with no one outside suspecting. 

Unless large objects/hands/fists were used or multiple rapists and lack of lubrication causes sphincter tearing or fistula-in which case the child becomes incontinent until repaired.

[spacial]

I also find aspects of this story a bit difficult to accept.

A knife injury will heal, but it is unlikely to heal naturally. The stress and movement in that part of a human body makes this almost impossible. Knife injuries tend to be deep which increases the opportinities for infection.

Infection is an almost certainty. From the knife. From the environment and from faecal matter.

Even if the knife injury was not to her rectum, anal rape of a child is likely to cause serious injury. The anus has a maximum dilation. It is also designed to open from the inside, so achieveing maximun dilation requires some conscious effort. This was an issue a few years ago, whan a bored hospital paeditrician decided to accuse a number of working class families of anally raping over 120 of their children.

[justmeinoz]

Maybe the journalist was no more accurate in writing up what was said of something that happened years before, than a lot of other reporters in the mainstream press. 

Rite_of_Inversion  correctly points out that kids will cover up things, especially if they blame themselves. Winter knew she shouldn't have been out after dark so would have tried to hide the consequences.

[spacial]

We can all fully understand the victim might try to hide this. But from the description of the injuries, it seems a little unlikely.

Though, as you said, journalists are known for embellishing. Sad though. Because with such obvious flaws, it does kinda deminish the authority of the piece.

[Dawn D.]

Until proven otherwise, I'll accept her and her account at face value.



Dawn

[Alexmakenoise]

I have to disagree with the remarks about the wounds not healing or being difficult to conceal.  Wounds don't usually get infected if you have a healthy immune system and keep them relatively clean.  Infections aren't usually lethal.  Most infections just cause pain, scarring, and make the wound take longer to heal.  It's actually fairly uncommon for an infection to spread from a wound and lead to sepsis. 

Also, rectal tissue tears and bleeds pretty easily but still manages to heal fast because of the way the body responds to internal injuries.  Sitting down would have been painful but bearable.

It takes a lot of guts to open up to people about something so personal.  Much less the media.  Sometimes people do make stuff up for attention, material gain, etc., but that's probably a minority of the time.  I think it's important to give people the benefit of the doubt because if they are telling the truth, they should be applauded for their honesty.  Casting disbelief on them only discourages other people from coming forward about similar things.  People should be encouraged to speak openly about sexual violence.  A lot of acts of sexual violence never get reported to anyone, and one of the common reasons is, "No one will believe me".

[spacial]

I accept the points Alexmakenoise.

I'm afraid I'm very cynical about journalism.

[regan]

I googled her name only to learn, by her own admission, she has been the victim of multiple hate crimes.  Like everyone else, I hate to by cynical, but is everytime something bad happens to her a hate crime (in her own mind)?

[Sada]

bye

[winterlaurel]

Hello ladies and gentlemen.

I am Winter, the subject of this article. Please feel free to call me Winwin as that is my nickname. A friend told me about this discussion and asked if I'd like to address it, so here I am! Nice to meet you all.

I have been so hesitant to share my violent experiences with people because of things like skepticism and criticism. In regards to this story, I requested that David leave details out. My family is so very private and I do my best to respect that. They've seen what I've been through and they haven't gotten the kindest reception at times due to supporting my transition. I can't blame them for wanting privacy. That is the biggest reason I have been relatively quiet about the violence I have experienced, my respect for my family.

On the subject of disbelief, I can completely understand skepticism. Hell, I didn't even believe my own nightmares to be memories until a doctor pointed things out to me years later. I didn't want to believe it. To this day, the memories feel like a badly animated first person perspective slideshow in my head, foggy, dark, and somewhat disconnected. I don't know how else to describe it. Sometimes, it is so vivid though. Anyway, I am getting sidetracked.

To address some other details, yes, I've been through multiple violent crimes - not all of which were hate related, but most of which were. I was in a strange place mentally for some time (what can you expect after going through something like that after all) - I allowed myself to fall into some unhealthy patterns. For example, I disregarded my own safety at times and made bad choices. Similarly, I entered several abusive relationships in a classic cycle because in some ways I felt 'normal' when violence came my way. I think I was punishing myself as well. Sometimes, I still find myself trying to punish myself mentally by denying myself a happy moment - something I have to make a conscious effort to control. I largely blame myself for many things that happened to me. All the same, I didn't ask for hate-driven violence to happen to me. I certainly didn't make it difficult for them in some of the situations, sure, but nobody deserves that. I should have been more careful and I should have respected myself more. That lesson is learned the hard way sometimes. I don't think I really learned it until I married my husband. He has been a tremendous source of healing in my life and I couldn't be more grateful. ANYHOW, I'm starting to ramble - my apologies.

Anyway, it comes down to this:

People will think what they will.  I can't blame you if you don't believe me - but I am most certainly telling the truth. More importantly, whether or not you believe me, is that you get the message: we cannot let fear control us. And for those of us who have been through terrible things, take it from me - you CAN recover and things can be good again.

Much love to you all. I hope you're well.

Hearts,
Winter

PS - Again, it is wonderful to meet you all. My email is attached to my account here if anyone ever needs to talk or wishes to discuss other trans matters. Have a wonderful holiday!

[Shana A]

Winter,

Welcome to Susan's, and thanks for sharing your very difficult story with the press! People need to be aware of what discrimination our community faces. I wish you all the best in continued healing from this violence against you!

Zythyra

[spacial]

Hi winwin.

The scepticism is directed toward journalists.

I can say with confidence, that you, personally, have the full support of everyone here. Many of us have experienced violence because of who we are.

There is no justification for violence. No-one brings violence upon themselves. Violence is unacceptable.

We all here are attempting, in many different ways, to create a better society and future for ourselves and our children. But many of us have grown scptable and cynical in reaction to some of the more specious reports we read.

But as I said, you, personally, have our full support. I really hope you will continue to contribute to Susans'. We are all friends here.

[winterlaurel]

Thank you both very much. Pleased to make your acquaintance.