how do you know if your passing or if people just dont care?

[Jen61]

I had a cis-male roomate in college. When i first met him i notice that he had female pelvis. He is a pretty generic red-blooded hero American male. My point is that it rather common to find traits corresponding to the opposite gender in people. The cause is genetics. Most women are consciously and unconsciously aware of it, and they use tricks to disguise them. Guys on theother hand are pretty oblivious to it, in denial or both. Males do not tell other guys about their perceived female traits least you are picking a fight.

This therad reminds me of a beach competition held several years ago in Florida. The prankster put a dozen guy with nice legs (shaved of course) in high heels and standing behind a curtain so only the legs could be seen. Then asked the audience to pick the most beautifully womanly leg. Everybody thought the "ladies" had nice legs, but when revealed their true gender, then people start noticing the male characteristics. So,like said previously, the test is a failure if you have a pre-notion.

Jen61

PS. I fund the pictures of most ladies in this forum very female-like and pretty. I found most women I encounter in my life pretty too.

[Sailor_Saturn]

Short of developing telepathic powers, you will never know what people are really thinking. And it's really a big waste of time to worry about strangers' opinions of you anyway, considering you'll probably see them only once in your entire life.

[MsDazzler]

I've also noticed that if you meet a person's glance then you glance back twice, it sends off the vibe that you are worried about something and they pick up on it. Best to just glance once then only glance twice if you are trying to flirt with that person. 

[lonely girl]

tell friends, ask them wether they could have tell that you were trans

[Eve of chaos]

tell friends, ask them wether they could have tell that you were trans

anyone I've ever asked said I look good and they wouldn't give me a second look if they didn't know me.
but the thing is they do know me so I cant take it as I pass or not.

I'm not beating myself up over this but its something I'm really curious about. I still go out and still don't care what people think. but id really like to know if I pass. I just don't know how to tell really.

[lonely girl]

anyone I've ever asked said I look good and they wouldn't give me a second look if they didn't know me.
but the thing is they do know me so I cant take it as I pass or not.

I'm not beating myself up over this but its something I'm really curious about. I still go out and still don't care what people think. but id really like to know if I pass. I just don't know how to tell really.

I went to the same phase as you did... I was constantly insecure about my passibility, and I would tell friends that I knew after living as a girl, and whom I can trust that I'm trans, and I would ask them to tell me honestly wether they had a clue about it... It took quite some of that to convince me

[apple pie]

I haven't got to the stage where I started telling people I got to know after I started living fully as a girl about it yet. Perhaps I don't feel close enough to any of them yet to tell them (I've only been full-time for less than 11 months). I am scared of it, to be honest... I can still see the boy part when I look in the mirror. I still don't feel fully convinced that people who didn't know me before cannot see it at all. I don't have to worry about not passing when I go out, but wouldn't someone at least have a slight doubt when they see me? That's what I always wonder still.

[El]

I haven't got to the stage where I started telling people I got to know after I started living fully as a girl about it yet. Perhaps I don't feel close enough to any of them yet to tell them (I've only been full-time for less than 11 months). I am scared of it, to be honest... I can still see the boy part when I look in the mirror. I still don't feel fully convinced that people who didn't know me before cannot see it at all. I don't have to worry about not passing when I go out, but wouldn't someone at least have a slight doubt when they see me? That's what I always wonder still.

Sorry, im totally resurrecting this thread. you siad yourself you don't have to worry about not passing when you are out so i imagine you look pretty good and thats often enough, i dont think people are out looking for transgendered people!! If i took photos of the natal women in my local town i recon that the majority of them would get "clocked" in the do i pass thread. And for FTMs i think its even more of a slim chance of doubt as there are a huge amount of people that dont even know FTMs exist!

I think in most peoples minds theres a big area of not passing and a big area of passing and a very slim grey area inbetween purely because its not something people are really looking for.

[Felix]

I agree with El. I've been stunned by how much of the general public doesn't even have the concept of trans on their radar, much less know how to clock us.

[Lily]

And for FTMs i think its even more of a slim chance of doubt as there are a huge amount of people that dont even know FTMs exist!

I didn't know until I started researching my own transition.

[Mahsa Tezani]

I agree with El. I've been stunned by how much of the general public doesn't even have the concept of trans on their radar, much less know how to clock us.

I'm around straight men often...they definitely are aware of MtFs. I rememeber I saw them before as a boy and thought, "Hey look at that man! why the hell is he dressed like that" or "that girl isn't very easy on the eyes. There's something wrong with her face".

[Darrin Scott]

I agree with El. I've been stunned by how much of the general public doesn't even have the concept of trans on their radar, much less know how to clock us.

This is true to some extent. People either read you as male or female in my experience. I think very few people know about trans anything. Especially FTM's.

[pretty]

Small test

Trans or cis, why, pass? (age 31)

Cis, though is she seriously 31?

Obviously there are some women on here that have masculine features (you don't seem to to me)  but many  ciswomen I've seen have masculine features including myself. 

I'm sorry lol but you can't compare a few masculine features on a cis woman to the passing problems a trans woman has. They are totally different things. It's the difference between mostly feminine and mostly masculine features.

[Jen61]

I'm sorry lol but you can't compare a few masculine features on a cis woman to the passing problems a trans woman has. They are totally different things. It's the difference between mostly feminine and mostly masculine features.

There are many women who are more masculine than many guys.

True story:

Female teen (speking to my youngest daughter); You Dad looks like woman
My daugther: your Mom looks like an ugly man

Me: LMAO


I seen women with norrow hips, deep voices, broad shoulders, big hands, unibrows, and even bossing. FFS is not only performed in XY-females but also in XX-females

[Forever21Chic]

There are many women who are more masculine than many guys.

  There are but they're few in numbers. I guess it depends on where you live though because around here only once in a blue moon do i ever see a woman who looks more masculine then a man. 


 

Just live your life and stop worrying. You'll pass more that way.

  Best advice ever.

[Mahsa Tezani]

  There are but they're few in numbers. I guess it depends on where you live though because around here only once in a blue moon do i ever see a woman who looks more masculine then a man. 

We got samoans, filipinos, middle eastern, indians, and a large Mexican populous here. Most of the people assume I am Mexican, so I get away with having a wider jaw...Most of the women are also short here.

Then again, in lily white Pleasenton...people think the same thing. So I don't know.

[MsDazzler]

We got samoans, filipinos, middle eastern, indians, and a large Mexican populous here. Most of the people assume I am Mexican, so I get away with having a wider jaw...Most of the women are also short here.

Then again, in lily white Pleasenton...people think the same thing. So I don't know.

Gawk, I have mistaken many Mex chicks for being trans sometimes.... because they have so masculine faces for the most part and they tend to wear heavy make up... I suppose to help flatter and feminize their faces

[Mahsa Tezani]

Gawk, I have mistaken many Mex chicks for being trans sometimes.... because they have so masculine faces for the most part and they tend to wear heavy make up... I suppose to help flatter and feminize their faces

I actually saw a Latin transgirl today. I had no idea she was trans until she talked. Very beautiful.. She had very short hair and a lot of very feminine energy. She was a cosmetic artist like me.

My first experience with people I knew transsexuals were with the filipina girls at Macys and other union square department stores.

[Eve of chaos]

I went in to a liquor store the other day to buy alcohol for friends.

I was in heavy makeup and a really small dress...that is quite flattering to my body actually.

when I showed the guy my ID he didnt react at all, kept smiling kept talking about how I barely made it. no reaction whatsoever.

either he knew from the start and didnt care so I didnt pass or he clearly didnt see the picture on my ID where I have a  giant beard.

I dont get it.

[Mahsa Tezani]

I went in to a liquor store the other day to buy alcohol for friends.

I was in heavy makeup and a really small dress...that is quite flattering to my body actually.

when I showed the guy my ID he didnt react at all, kept smiling kept talking about how I barely made it. no reaction whatsoever.

either he knew from the start and didnt care so I didnt pass or he clearly didnt see the picture on my ID where I have a  giant beard.

I dont get it.

Maybe he knew, maybe he was watching the game... or maybe, just maybe...

He didn't know/care that you were trans or assumed it was your brother's ID.