I hate being asked if I am a top!

[JennX]

The kinds of guys who are after me are basically guys who should know. But apparently not... Kinda weird not being chased by ->-bleeped-<-s, but by clueless straights. LOL

But I suppose thats better

... and let's not forget my favorite group... "bi-curious guys". 

[Mahsa Tezani]

... and let's not forget my favorite group... "bi-curious guys". 

What are those?

[Torn1990]

Ughh.... most of the men I have met online invariably ask me if I am a top or would consider topping them as it has been their "curiosity" to be penetrated anally or "fantasy" that they have always wanted to try...

I retort tartly that I am a lady and would do no such thing, and furthermore that I am a woman in all ways including in the sack - I have always preferred the bottom role even in my gay relationships previously.

They slyly suggest that even some women wear strap-on dildos and top - but they want the sensation of a "real cock" in their asses.

Hmph! 

Well it appears someone enjoys their gender roles. To be a women in all ways you need to be penetrated by the cock! That's so wrong on so many levels but i'll keep it at that.
(As a feminist i can't bloody help myself.)
Anyway, there are definitely clusters of self identified straight men who fetishize pre-op trans women, but then again isn't every one in some way fetishized during sex? I honestly am quite glad to hear their are men that don't identify as gay or bi and are open to being penetrated. Well, cheers to You finding a man that suits your needs : ) I wish the best for you in that.
As for me, i love my gender queer boyfriend. So many possibilities! Even though i generally take a sub role as well, having the option to dominate in some form is still there. And i'm pro-choice. (shlawl.)
also, i worked at a sex shop. I sat for an hr listening to some old man describe his lust for pre op trans women. It was bitter sweet: kind of torturous but still wonderful to be in front of.

[MsDazzler]

Okay.... this behooves another question - if a transwoman enjoy topping, is she any less woman for being like that since she is taking the "traditional male" role? I know anal sex has nothing to do with sexual orientation; so I wonder if it has any relation to gender.

[Mahsa Tezani]

Okay.... this behooves another question - if a transwoman enjoy topping, is she any less woman for being like that since she is taking the "traditional male" role? I know anal sex has nothing to do with sexual orientation; so I wonder if it has any relation to gender.

Not this again.

Her transition is as valid as one who bottoms.

[eli77]

Okay.... this behooves another question - if a transwoman enjoy topping, is she any less woman for being like that since she is taking the "traditional male" role? I know anal sex has nothing to do with sexual orientation; so I wonder if it has any relation to gender.

Seriously? You HAVE heard of lesbians before right? How exactly do you think we ->-bleeped-<- if nobody tops?

And for the record "topping" does not necessarily mean penetrating the other person with a cock, whether homegrown or store-bought.


Sorry if that was rude, but the obsessive gender-role conformity on these forums is getting to me again. That's totally awesome if that's what you want. But it has nothing to do with me.

[Mahsa Tezani]

And for the record "topping" does not necessarily mean penetrating the other person with a cock, whether homegrown or store-bought.

Topping makes me think of my past...so many barebacks I saw.

[Lynn]

Topping makes me think of cupcakes.

And now I'm hungry.

[Bishounen]

There's an unmentionable word on this board She-male those women are often off HRT and thus able to top. Which has to be quite dangerous, having no hormones in ones body.

->-bleeped-<-s are not automatically able to top only because they are ->-bleeped-<-s. Many are total limps aswell, something which can be repeatedly seen in classic ->-bleeped-<--porn.
However, perhaps you refer to ->-bleeped-<--tops. If so, then it is my understanding that they are generally not off hormones. Some probably do it that way, yes, but otherwise the actors either takes Viagra, or, are hired because of their already "functional" abilities.

I remember when I for fun scanned through sex-adds in a Hollywood newspaper once and all these adds with Pre-ops having the added info of "Functional TS", meaning that they had the ability to get a hardon and top someone.

However, in the eighties this was much more rare in porn, and not seldomly you could see how the chich struggled with trying to top the guy with a total limpy.

[jsorter]

This doesnt go with your topic but then again it does. I'm tired of guys just wanting to experiment or have an occasional hook up! Don't get me wrong i love to have sex too but I also would like something more than just sex, you know?

[MsDazzler]

Seriously? You HAVE heard of lesbians before right? How exactly do you think we <not allowed> if nobody tops?

And for the record "topping" does not necessarily mean penetrating the other person with a cock, whether homegrown or store-bought.


Sorry if that was rude, but the obsessive gender-role conformity on these forums is getting to me again. That's totally awesome if that's what you want. But it has nothing to do with me.

Well, you have two camps of people, I guess - one is all about defying gender role conformity, and the other one is all about adhering to gender role conformity in all possible ways.

Guess which camp I fall in -  I am totally, totally,, hopelessly a romantic who wants to be swept away in a Cinderella dress by her tall, dark, and handsome Prince Charming, be sheltered & protected by him, and make him great meals! Drawing bubble baths with petals, us kissing by candelight and steam all over us... I better stop now!!! 

[MsDazzler]

->-bleeped-<-s are not automatically able to top only because they are ->-bleeped-<-s. Many are total limps aswell, something which can be repeatedly seen in classic ->-bleeped-<--porn.
However, perhaps you refer to ->-bleeped-<--tops. If so, then it is my understanding that they are generally not off hormones. Some probably do it that way, yes, but otherwise the actors either takes Viagra, or, are hired because of their already "functional" abilities.

I remember when I for fun scanned through sex-adds in a Hollywood newspaper once and all these adds with Pre-ops having the added info of "Functional TS", meaning that they had the ability to get a hardon and top someone.

However, in the eighties this was much more rare in porn, and not seldomly you could see how the chich struggled with trying to top the guy with a total limpy.

I know this is a controversial topic - my two cents on this is that most of them are broke and desperate, and after being on hormones for years and they need jobs, so they go into porn, and when the director calls for them to top, they go off hormones for a while so they can get erections. When I watch "->-bleeped-<-" porn, I can tell who are "reluctant tops" by the way they listlessly penetrate or are not even looking at the male bottom at all.

And of course, there are some who just turned into "->-bleeped-<-s" for porn as a fetish and sexual thrill - you can tell by the way they vicariously go at it during the scenes.

[Rabbit]

And of course, there are some who just turned into "->-bleeped-<-s" for porn as a fetish and sexual thrill - you can tell by the way they vicariously go at it during the scenes.

Hehe who can tell who is a "->-bleeped-<- for thrills" by how much they like sex?

I guess a "real girl" just lays there and cries till it is over

[JenJen2011]

I don't like being asked if I'm a top NOR if I'm a bottom. Top and bottom are words used by gay men.

[JennX]

Topping makes me think of my past...so many barebacks I saw.

Topping makes me think of... hot fudge and whipped cream on an ice cream sundae. 

I don't like being asked if I'm a top NOR if I'm a bottom. Top and bottom are words used by gay men.

And this is why any guy using this sort of verbiage, sets off big red-flag to me. If a guy starts with this sort of request, especially after I've really made it abundantly clear, that it isn't something I'm into, I move on.

[MiaSakura]

I'm with you Jenn! XD

[Mahsa Tezani]

Top and bottom are words used by gay men.

Yep. I learned many of my gay friends are tops...Kinda weird.

But a straight guy using that term? HELL NAW!!!

[MsDazzler]

I don't like being asked if I'm a top NOR if I'm a bottom. Top and bottom are words used by gay men.

Would you prefer the terms "penetrator" and "penetatree"? 

[JenJen2011]

Would you prefer the terms "penetrator" and "penetatree"? 

None of the above. As far as I know, women are not asked these types of questions.

[Rabbit]

None of the above. As far as I know, women are not asked these types of questions.

Because it is assumed they are the "bottom"...

And girls who are into more kinky stuff? Who like to top their partners? They at least hint to what they are after.

I don't mind being asked, I don't expect people to be able to read my mind