What Made You Laugh Today ?

[Dominatrix ♥]

This

[Shantel]

This

Ouch, that was a nasty face plant! 

[Dominatrix ♥]

Ouch, that was a nasty face plant! 

Who told her to race on heels? *Not that I wouldn't* 

[of a sort]

Looked like it was one of those high heel runs if I'm not mistaken. The others looked to be wearing heels as well.

[Dominatrix ♥]

Looked like it was one of those high heel runs if I'm not mistaken. The others looked to be wearing heels as well.

Only time I run with heels is when I feel like I'm about to get brutally murder.. 
chances are that I will kill myself before the attacker gets to me..

[Shantel]

Only time I run with heels is when I feel like I'm about to get brutally murder.. 
chances are that I will kill myself before the attacker gets to me..

Heels can be a dangerous weapon. I recently read about a woman that hit her boyfriend on the head with one of her spike heels and killed him. They are known to poke holes in floors especially on linoleum even when worn by little women, there's a lot of PSI pressure under these heels.

[Lauren5]

The French students in the classroom that is used for my math class on Thursdays have terrible accents. Funny to listen to, but not as agonizing as dad's.

[YBtheOutlaw]

the toddler next door is starting to form little sentences on his own now, though he sometimes twists the words saying the syllables in wrong order, sometimes creating hilarious phrases. so he's learnt a new sentence today, that is we cut paper with scissors. you ask him what do you do with scissors, he'd reply 'we cut paper' BUT, he can't say cut properly so twists it everytime he says it, and the outcome is the equivalent for f***! you could laugh for hours seeing how he says it with utmost confidence! then he laughs with us too! i just adore that kid, i wish i could get rid of my jealousy for his you-know-what organs.
just in case it confuses you, please note that the kid was not speaking english, but our native language.

[Gina Taylor]

My new female friend was getting her hair done and the hairstylist asked her if I was her husband, and she told her no, but I soon will be.

[King Malachite]

My mom made  me sign a life insurance paper.  I attributed it to the fact that I told her I'm stll going to buy a moped against her wishes lol.

[LordKAT]

My mom made  me sign a life insurance paper.

That's funny?

[King Malachite]

That's funny?

Yes.  I added the reason above.

[Devlyn]

The sad fact is, life insurance for most people means just enough money to bury you so your family isn't burdened with it.

"The average cost of a funeral in 2012 was more than $8,500 for a burial service and $3,700 for a cremation service"

[of a sort]

The sad fact is, life insurance for most people means just enough money to bury you so your family isn't burdened with it.

"The average cost of a funeral in 2012 was more than $8,500 for a burial service and $3,700 for a cremation service"

I have no qualms about sticking my family with the cost of cremation. They'll be getting a really nice house out of it...

[LordKAT]

Yes.  I added the reason above.

Now it is funny.

[King Malachite]

The sad fact is, life insurance for most people means just enough money to bury you so your family isn't burdened with it.

"The average cost of a funeral in 2012 was more than $8,500 for a burial service and $3,700 for a cremation service"

That's pretty much what my mother said.   If she can avoid those costs by donating my body to science then I don't mind.  They probably wouldnt' take my body but it's worth a shot. 

Now it is funny.

Yeah when my mom gave me the paper I said "It's because I'm going to drive a moped and because I'll be a beginner driver, isn't it?"

She shifted her eyes and started to laugh.

[Tanya W]

The opening scene in an episode of 'Gilmore Girls'. I heard it playing in another room as I was just waking up. I cannot now even recall what happened in these three minutes - though I believe it involved Lorelia, Rory, and the parents/grandparents. I do recall a bit of belly laughter rippling through my body as I lay there wrapped in a warm quilt. Nice way to start another day... 

[FTMDiaries]

Slightly NSFW-ish

This is the front-page story in my local newspaper today: Fight for your ->-bleeped-<-gots!

I know the word is used as a homophobic slur in the US, but here in England it is the somewhat ridiculous name of a delicious dish of oversized meatballs, which are usually served with mash or chips, peas and gravy.

Here's the image from the article, in case you've never seen a ->-bleeped-<-got before and don't fancy risking a Google Image Search:

There's even a helpful related article on that page with tips on 'How to make ->-bleeped-<-gots'. Oh, and it is a source of delight for me to know that for many years, my mother-in-law worked in a ->-bleeped-<-got-making factory. 

The reason for the article is that a couple of people have had their Facebooks locked because they talked about, or posted pictures of, plates of ->-bleeped-<-gots. A simple misunderstanding of a very innocent English word that has negative American connotations.

->-bleeped-<-gots are widely available in pubs here in the West Country, and part of the fun of ordering them is the innuendo you can come up with while you wait for them to arrive.

So, in case you're curious: yes, I have eaten several ->-bleeped-<-gots in my time. They're hot and delicious, and there's nothing quite as satisfying as stuffing your face with a nice, big chunk of meat... and ->-bleeped-<-gots certainly provide you with that. And they're at their best when they come with loads of gravy... 

[KabitTarah]

Here's another for you!!



and yeah... I searched on "bundle of sticks"

[FTMDiaries]

Here's another for you!!

Those look a bit dry... perhaps you need more gravy.