Ask Matt: Cremating Breasts After Chest Surgery

[Shana A]

Ask Matt: Cremating Breasts After Chest Surgery

February 27, 2012 by Matt Kailey

http://tranifesto.com/2012/02/27/ask-matt-cremating-breasts-after-chest-surgery/

A reader writes: "I'm a 48-year-old transguy, and I will finally be able to have chest reconstruction surgery in May. This is a big deal for me for all the usual reasons. It also holds special meaning as a transition point as a parent. While I am a straight, somewhat stereotypical binary-type of guy in a lot of ways, I am also a mom.

[...]

"For me, top surgery represents an honoring and a letting go of a part of my body that was very uncomfortable almost all of the time, and that does not fit me at all anymore, but also a part of my body that allowed me to nurse and nurture my daughters. I feel a need to both honor and let go of that part in a meaningful way.

"For me, having the parts that are removed incinerated as medical waste doesn't seem right. I would like to have it cremated and be able to scatter the ashes. I have heard that people who have to have an amputation will do this, so it should be possible for a transperson to do so. Unfortunately, I have not been able to find anyone who can help me with this.

[Felix]

I, uh. I have to admit this headline cracked me up. Being trans is strange. We have interesting problems. His view is legit - I nursed my daughter and I understand how sacred it feels. I'm very traditional (in the sense of we have a lot of family traditions) and I respect the idea of recognizing important turning points.

But I'd be honored to have any of my partial or complete remains incinerated as medical waste. Maybe that way I could go out with some of my used needles.

I also feel like I got my goodbyes to my breasts over with when I weaned the kid. It would be redundant for me to cremate them. And I wouldn't identify myself as a mom unless my daughter needed me to.

I like seeing how differently we all approach these things.

[spacial]

Don't have breasts of course, but if I were to lose the ugly bit I don't think I'd be that worried about what happens to it.

We had a discussion on here a couple of years ago, about anthropomorphising parts of our bodies.  (I confess, I was my typical single minded self on that one. Apologies to any affected). This seems to me to be an aspect of that.