Quote from: Chris29 on February 20, 2013, 11:15:06 AM
Definitely, your results are very good Miranda!
As for myself, started at 19/ hrt shortly few days after 20th b-day --> still think why didn't have the courage to do this at 14/15 or so. It s a normal thing to wonder what could have been.
Thank you for your kind compliment Chris, and I agree, it is natural to look back. I need to stop though, because I'm looking back too much lately. I've made so many terrible decisions in my life between nearly transitioning in 1978 and finally doing it in 2011, that today in the mall with my mom I had these pangs of sadness that were so bad I thought I was going to break down and cry right there. I didn't even know what set me off to make me feel that way, but it undoubtedly had to do with transitioning late and issues with age and wasted decades. I didn't just have dysphoria come from the mist in my twenties or later. My earliest memory is of me in my mom's makeup and jewelry thinking I was my mom and dad's daughter at 2, a memory that has never changed, along with the feeling I'm in the wrong body. There were no girls in my family, but somehow my mom had frilly dresses and other things to dress me, and for me to dress and play in from 2 to 4 1/2, another clear and painful memory. My mom, who just turned 85, desperately wanted a daughter when she had me told me a few months ago that she wishes I would have been clearer during my adolescence about how badly I needed to live as a woman because they would have let me transition then. I told them so clearly at 16 I hated my body and wanted to live as a girl that they sent me to a psychiatrist. It's a nice thought but never would have happened. I'm a baby boomer and we were taught before anything to conform and keep our voices down, because "What will the neighbors think?" I can honestly admit that I can't remember what that male impersonator called Randy used to look like, but after all the terrible decisions I've made and the dire consequences that accompanied them I spend too much hard earned happiness I've acquired during this last 17+ months thinking 'what if?'. But after writing this, I feel somewhat purged of that feeling! By the way, thank you Jamie, for your ticker factory instructions. God bless you all, Mira