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Favorite lines by people who "just don't get it"

Started by Beth Andrea, July 28, 2012, 02:50:01 AM

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King Malachite

Quote from: Beth Andrea on December 14, 2012, 04:05:02 PM
There is a negative connotation...basically they're saying, "I don't approve of what you're doing, but I don't want to appear as insensitive or intolerant, so ill just let G-d judge you."

I think the term would be "passive-aggressive."

That's exactly how I feel when people tell me that!  I just didn't know the right words to put it in.
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http://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,135882.0.html


"Sometimes you have to go through outer hell to get to inner heaven."

"Anomalies can make the best revolutionaries."
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Liminal Stranger

Hang on, let me get the book  ::)

"You're not a boy, so just get over yourself and learn to accept the way you are."
"No, this is not you."
"I gave birth to a girl! I know what you are!"
"What, do you think I'm going to allow you to cut your breasts off?!"
"You're so scientific. You know that injecting male hormones into a female body is harmful. You have so many other issues- why cause more?"
"Why can't you just stop this? You're killing me. I'm going to die of a heart attack because you're stressing me."
"No matter how many times you say it, this will never be true."
"I know you're not meant to be this. I just know it, don't ask me how."
"I raised you for all these years! I think I know you by now!"
"You've just put this in your head. You manipulated yourself into believing this."
"People don't go around changing their bodies like that. ...They do? Well, anyone who does that is sick!"
"Why can't you just be normal? Why do you have to be a psychotic freak?!"
"I don't believe in those kinds of people. I think they're all crazy."
"You can't just go against biology."
"You want to do this when you're 18? Go ahead. Leave, and I'll just wash my hands of you for good."
"So I'm just supposed to believe that this has been going on?"
"You haven't always been like this."
"You didn't find this out during (insert approximate time here)."

*Trigger warning?*
"Maybe your father caused this. He did cause a lot of damage when he hit you." (Nope, not going into this one.)
</trigger>

"You were just happy being a girl."
"You know, that brain tumor could be causing all of this."
"You're just putting this in your head."
"That ***hole of a boyfriend you have put this in your head. This is just to fulfill one of his sick fantasies."
"I know you haven't had the best childhood, and I think that may have caused this."
"Why are you doing this to me?!"

On parenting:
"You'll make a great mother someday!" NO.
"You have to have children! How else am I going to have grandkids?"
"How could you possibly know you don't want kids yet? Just wait and see."
"I can see it now! You'll fall in love with a professor, and the two of you will work side by side in lab coats, with the children playing in the adjacent room behind a glass safety door, and chimpanzees will take care of them and feed them with the bottle like this *makes feeding motion*. They'll have bonnets on and everything because they're trained to be nannies, since you don't like the idea of pawning children off onto other people."

So..., I want my body to be male so I can actually live my life in peace, and she wants my children to be raised by bonnet-wearing chimpanzees. And I'm the crazy one here.

But wait, there's more!

"Name one thing about you that makes you a boy."
"You know, when I was a kid, I thought about it too. But then I fell in love with a nice boy, grew out of that phase and moved on with my life."
"Why can't you just admit that you're a lesbian?"
"How do you think this could possibly make you happier?"
"I hate to tell you, but sexual orientation and gender identity are the same thing."
"Sex and gender are interchangeable."
"You're throwing your life away!"

"Do you think people are actually going to be accepting of you?"
Well, anyone else I've told has given me this general response:
"Huh, that's actually really cool."
Followed by some questions on what they should do pronoun and namewise and if and when I plan to transition by surgical means- you know, the whole nine yards, discussed as casually as the weather.

Then I have to go back to hearing this kind of thing:

"You have all these opportunities and you're giving them up for this nonsense!"
"You're never going to have a normal relationship."
"What do you think, people won't know you were born a girl?"

Now, this person claims to "love me no matter what", yet is on the opposite end of the spectrum from the accepting friends whom she says don't exist. Then she accused me of selling my ADD medication to kids in school.
Fun.








"And if you feel that you can't go on, in the light you will find the road"
- In the Light, Led Zeppelin
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Kevin Peña

I was listening to some music at school, when someone who "didn't get it" started insulting me. Then I played a certain song pretty loud and got a laugh from everyone present, minus him, of course.

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Sephirah

The weirdest thing I've ever heard from someone was as follows:

Person in question: "Wait, so you think you're like Optimus Prime?"

Me: "What? No, I'm Transgendered, not a Transformer. Jeez."

I kid you not. I think this person may have been inebriated at the time though. Hard to tell really, it was an online conversation. Not a long one, granted.
Natura nihil frustra facit.

"You yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe, deserve your love and affection." ~ Buddha.

If you're dealing with self esteem issues, maybe click here. There may be something you find useful. :)
Above all... remember: you are beautiful, you are valuable, and you have a shining spark of magnificence within you. Don't let anyone take that from you. Embrace who you are. <3
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big kim

Why can't you just be gay
You'll never get a decent job
You'll never get a boyfriend/girlfriend
Why can't you just dress up at home so no one would know

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Padma

Incidentally, rumour has it that Optimus Prime is due to become Optima Prime. Hey, it's not just guys who are into being cars.
Womandrogyne™
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Edge

Quote from: Liminal Stranger on December 31, 2012, 01:25:43 PMNow, this person claims to "love me no matter what", yet is on the opposite end of the spectrum from the accepting friends whom she says don't exist. Then she accused me of selling my ADD medication to kids in school.
Fun.
Reminds me of my parents. ::) I'm glad you can recognize that she's nuts and won't let her stop you.
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Emily Aster

I can't even add to this list, but so many of them are things I've heard and I've only told two people! It's like they think this is some spur of the moment thing that will pass. They try to set your mind right with all these reasons why you're not. Do they not get that everything that they could possibly think of to make me see the light is something I've tried to use on myself over the course of my life? If it was as easy as just a few one-liners I wouldn't be sitting here at my desk as a woman dying to start a transition.
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Beth Andrea

Quote from: Emily52736 on January 01, 2013, 11:50:19 AM
I can't even add to this list, but so many of them are things I've heard and I've only told two people! It's like they think this is some spur of the moment thing that will pass. They try to set your mind right with all these reasons why you're not. Do they not get that everything that they could possibly think of to make me see the light is something I've tried to use on myself over the course of my life? If it was as easy as just a few one-liners I wouldn't be sitting here at my desk as a woman dying to start a transition.

I wonder if it's the basic nature of most humans..."I'm the only one who knows better!...If someone tells me something that I've never in my life thought of, it must be because that person is wrong.

I can't be wrong...that'd be scary! That would mean I'd have to think about things, and oh damn that stuff hurts!"

People who like to think usually ask questions first--open ended questions, designed to get information rather than confirm a suspicion.

But hey, that's just me...and I'm the only one who knows better!  ;) LOL
...I think for most of us it is a futile effort to try and put this genie back in the bottle once she has tasted freedom...

--read in a Tessa James post 1/16/2017
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Liminal Stranger

Quote from: Edge on January 01, 2013, 09:35:48 AM
Reminds me of my parents. ::) I'm glad you can recognize that she's nuts and won't let her stop you.

Yeah, you know you're in loony land when your mother feels compelled to read all of your text messages when there's some personal stuff in them, yet hides hers because she's been bad-mouthing you to your father.

More stuff from the gender police:  :police:

"Who do you think you're kidding with this?"
"When are you going to stop lying to yourself?"
"You'll never look like a boy. I don't care what you do, it won't make a difference because you are a GIRL."
"Why do you want to look like an ugly girl?"
"Yeah, well I don't want you to be a boy. I raised you to be a girl."
"Can't you just think what you want in your head without changing your body?"
"I'm not discussing this with you. You want to f*** up your life, go right ahead when you're 18, but I don't want to hear another word about it."
"Why aren't you normal?"
"What are you doing, looking for psychos like you online?"
"Are you looking for some lesbian cult or something?"
"Why would I take you to *that* kind of therapist? So you can manipulate them into giving you testosterone?"
"I don't give a s*** about your feelings. You aren't going to do this to me."

I'll admit something: Usually I stop listening and stare at the wall while receiving a barrage of insults  :P
"




"And if you feel that you can't go on, in the light you will find the road"
- In the Light, Led Zeppelin
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Violet Bloom

I give my mom huge credit for not freaking out when I came out to her, but she did say this:

"I never saw you as anything but male."

I think she's been a bit in denial of the signs that appeared here and there throughout my life.  This comes from the same person who agreed to buy me a doll when I asked at the age of 4.  I was such a great mother to that doll...  ~sigh~

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Kevin Peña

Quote from: Liminal Stranger on January 01, 2013, 12:35:28 PM
I'll admit something: Usually I stop listening and stare at the wall while receiving a barrage of insults  :P

I usually just blank out and think about cartoons.  :P
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Emily Aster

Quote from: Violet Bloom on January 01, 2013, 12:40:46 PM
I give my mom huge credit for not freaking out when I came out to her, but she did say this:

"I never saw you as anything but male."

I think she's been a bit in denial of the signs that appeared here and there throughout my life.  This comes from the same person who agreed to buy me a doll when I asked at the age of 4.  I was such a great mother to that doll...  ~sigh~

My mother only hit me with "are you gay" and "is this my fault", so I got off pretty easy on that one. She didn't flat out say that she only thought of me as a man, but I could see it in her eyes. I think she was in denial too. There were a lot of subtle signs and I ever remember words from her own mouth to my step-father about how feminine I was when he was trying to toughen me up. She didn't know I could hear her.
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Liminal Stranger

Quote from: DianaP on January 01, 2013, 12:44:07 PM
I usually just blank out and think about cartoons.  :P

LOL nice. Best to blank 'em out and think of the good things in life. ("I don't think you're happy enough!")

This one is always nice:

"So you're telling me that you're a man...and you like MEN? YOU'RE A GAY MAN?!" *breaks down crying and mutters something about her psycho child*

I don't even identify as anything. I just was in a relationship with someone who happened to be a guy. Geez.

Did an impression of her in a southern belle accent that ended with me falling over backwards onto the bed as if in a dead faint.

She laughed. She yelled afterwards, but she laughed. For two whole seconds.
Score.  >:-)




"And if you feel that you can't go on, in the light you will find the road"
- In the Light, Led Zeppelin
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Kevin Peña

Quote from: Liminal Stranger on January 01, 2013, 12:52:16 PM
Did an impression of her in a southern belle accent that ended with me falling over backwards onto the bed as if in a dead faint.

She laughed. She yelled afterwards, but she laughed. For two whole seconds.
Score.  >:-)

I do declare that that was ever so hysterical.  :laugh:
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Joe.

After giving my parents a letter explaining everything, my mum came in my room, tapped my head and said 'you've got a lot going round up there don't you' in a patronising tone. Then she said, 'Don't worry, you're still our daughter.'
Joey
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Emily Aster

Quote from: SageFox on November 24, 2012, 05:48:14 AM
"You're just confused and compensating because you're in a very masculine environment.  It'll probably go away when you get home."  This from a very close friend of mine that's normally very open-minded.  Like I'm going to going to get home and be a "real man" again once I take the uniform off.

I wish it was that simple. When I'm around guys like that, which seems to be always lately, I just get kind of depressed and isolated. I end up leaving earlier than I intended because of it and guess what. When I get home, it's straight back to female. It's the only time I feel comfortable with myself. And it's also the only time I can know myself without the influence of the outside world. I think alone time is really the only time that you can really know yourself.


And I finally went through all 11 pages and I guess I can add something to this. I've been told lots of times by the couple people I've told and even several times in anonymous settings like online about all the reasons that it sucks to be a woman and why would I want to do that. Yeah, like I'm really turning my life upside down and making myself a social outcast because I believe it will be an easier life. Right.
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Liminal Stranger

Quote from: Emily52736 on January 01, 2013, 10:11:56 PM
Yeah, like I'm really turning my life upside down and making myself a social outcast because I believe it will be an easier life. Right.
This. So very much this. Being trans isn't a means of escaping anything but having the wrong identity and the wrong life forced on us.
Some people just don't get how much really rides on it and think it's a choice. Let me tell you, if I could choose, I wouldn't be picking a road rife with obstacles that most don't face.

I'm not doing this because I want to be somebody else. I'm doing this because I want to be free.




"And if you feel that you can't go on, in the light you will find the road"
- In the Light, Led Zeppelin
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Jen-Jen

"Why can't you just do this on the weekends to get it out of your system?"
"Why now? You suppressed it for this long why not just suppress it for the rest of your life, so you can live a normal life?"
" How is this going to make you happy? "
" how do you know what it feels like to be a woman? You have never had a menstrual cycle!"
" Is this even accepted at your job? This can't look or be professional"
" you can never be a real woman, you'll always just be a boy with long hair in a dress!"

Just a few I heard this holiday season
Don't judge a book by its cover! My lifes been like a country song! True love, amazing grace, severe heartbreak, buckles, boots n spurs! I 've been thrown off the bull a couple times, I keep getting up and dusting myself off! Can't give up on my happily ever after!
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Beth Andrea

A new one, from yesterday:

him--"Your name is what?!?...I've never heard of a man called 'Beth' before."
me--"That's because I'm a woman."
*long pause*
him--"Well, you sure do look like a man."

::)

So he and talked about me transitioning, and either he was being polite or whatever, but when he left he said, "Well, good luck with that."
...I think for most of us it is a futile effort to try and put this genie back in the bottle once she has tasted freedom...

--read in a Tessa James post 1/16/2017
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