What is it like to de-transition?

[Alainaluvsu]

Back to the original topic:

I have actually never heard of people detransition actively and permanently due to financial concern. The only cases I have heard are of temporary setting aside of transition because they cannot afford procedures to make them pass and therefore go full time in the short term. I myself would rather starve and die than detransition, and I believe many other MTFs are the same.

I will never go back. Not while I'm breathing.

[kelly_aus]

I could never go back. To do so would be a form of death.

[Kelly J. P.]

 Sometimes, I think about temporarily de-transitioning to make life easier. Usually because I feel like I look ugly that day, or whatever. Sometimes, I think about de-transitioning to make life cheaper - transition is expensive, after all, and I would certainly be more successful if I didn't do it. Sometimes I think about de-transitioning to appease people, because I am an abomination to some eyes. Sometimes I think about de-transitioning to reproduce, and live a normal, if illusionary, life.

But... I cannot follow through. Like it or not, the idea of my being male is a farce - I don't act it, or sound it. There is no way I could ever be male, and enjoy it, except by enjoying how ridiculous it is that people actually see me as such. I couldn't be anything but a woman doing something to make her life easier... at the cost of my happiness. And that is unacceptable to me.   

[Dahlia]

I never had anything in common with transgender folk back in the 90s when I was transitioning, except for the obvious. They all seemed a bit weird and quirky to me.

Wellwellwell, but ofcourse very strong opiniated on the internet.....

[Nicolette]

Wellwellwell, but ofcourse very strong opiniated on the internet.....

With hindsight, I was probably the weird and quirky one.

[lilacwoman]

I'm under the strong impression there IS a set trans person

the set transperson appears older/white/father is because that group never had the opportunity of learning about transitioning - this especially applies in countries with anational health service.

By comparison:  only 3% of the biological women's population is lesbian...

alter the 3% to a minimum of 10% and add another 10% for the bisexual ie lesbians and you'd be close to the real total.

[Dahlia]

the set transperson appears older/white/father is because that group never had the opportunity of learning about transitioning - this especially applies in countries with anational health service.

Sounds like 'that group' is living in the 1950's...but don't we all live in 2012 heh? lol!

Welcome to the age of the internet!

[lilacwoman]

well I know for a fact that until the late 70s the standard treatmnet for anyone claiming to be transsexual was electroshock treatment and testo shots to make em stand up like a man though they no doubt kept on sitting to pee.

I also know very fem intersexes who were shipped off to boys schools to make them act like men.

it would be interesting and enlightening to have a tally of the number of TS who have been killed by transphobes in the various countries over the last 50 years.

[Dahlia]

well I know for a fact that until the late 70s the standard treatmnet for anyone claiming to be transsexual was electroshock treatment and testo shots to make em stand up like a man though they no doubt kept on sitting to pee.

I also know very fem intersexes who were shipped off to boys schools to make them act like men.

it would be interesting and enlightening to have a tally of the number of TS who have been killed by transphobes in the various countries over the last 50 years.

The late 1970's is 33+ years ago. We live in 2012 nowadays.

MTF killings are of the last +/- 10 years. Fifty years ago almost no one knew what a MTF was, including most MTF's themselves.

[lilacwoman]

precisely...now you are tripping yourself up over your superfemininity.

from what I hear about fifty years ago anyone who could read the Sunday newspapers was well aware of what a MtF was as April Ashley had been plastered all over them.

[Dahlia]

precisely...now you are tripping yourself up over your superfemininity.

from what I hear about fifty years ago anyone who could read the Sunday newspapers was well aware of what a MtF was as April Ashley had been plastered all over them.

I'm natural feminine and always was, from day 1 on. No way of either denying nor hiding it.

And 'the April Ashley case' was years after Christine Jorgensen's case...

What are you trying to prove?

[Jamie D]

STOP

[Naturally Blonde]

well I know for a fact that until the late 70s the standard treatment for anyone claiming to be transsexual was electroshock treatment and testo shots to make em stand up like a man though they no doubt kept on sitting to pee.

I first knew about three male to female transsexuals in a documentary I saw from 1973 and they certainly didn't receive electric shock treatment and their treatment was pretty much the same as it now.  As a young kid in 1973 I was sent to bed but sneaked downstairs to watch it.

Also Caroline 'Tula' Cossey's was receiving hormone therapy back in 1975. So I'm not sure where you got your incorrect information from?

[UCBerkeleyPostop]

STOP

yes, I decided to opt out of this "discussion" maybe we all just have to agree to disagree. 

[UCBerkeleyPostop]

Stop what?

Maybe, if we kept the generalizations to a minimum, we might actually hear from someone who detransitioned?

That topic died pages ago.  BTW there is nothing wrong with a little healthy debate IMO but at some point it just becomes like a cat chasing her tail.

[Jamie D]

Stop what?

Maybe, if we kept the generalizations to a minimum, we might actually hear from someone who detransitioned?

That topic died pages ago.  BTW there is nothing wrong with a little healthy debate IMO but at some point it just becomes like a cat chasing her tail.

There were posts removed.

[wendy]

Take it from someone who sort of kind of detransitioned: for most of us, it's not that big of a deal. We just find who we are and discover that, with time, we're much happier with a "middle ground" existence.

**I'm not talking about those who are really  ftms/mtfs and can't transition out of life circumstance. I'm talking about people who believe they could be either of those, but later on, realize they're not.

Makes sense to me.
....................

If you ever panned for gold most of time you get a pan of sand.  However you don't know which pan will produce a nugget of gold.  I learn when I listen and there are always nuggets of gold tucked in lessons of life.

I would love to have my best friend of 30 years and be able to express myself.  I miss hugging her.

Having gender issues my entire life has been a lonely journey.  Some surgeons are so glad to take your money and we are so vulnerable.  Some are unethical.  It would be nice for me to accept myself and find some peace.

Yes writing and reading others thoughts are therapy for me.

.................
I know which mode makes me happier and many in community know that answer too.

I applaud those that transition to make their life better.

I applaud those that de-transition to make their life better.

I applaud those that sit on fence if neither side looks greener.

I see no difference between a cross dresser that feels they are a woman and does nothing more and a person that gets GCS and feels they are a woman.  That is their experience of life.  It is not correct or incorrect.  It is not better or worse.  It is not more woman or less woman.  It is their choice.

Is a genetic woman that is masculine a woman?  Of course.

Is a genetic woman that enjoys company of other woman a woman?  Of course.

Now big question:

Is a trans woman that is attracted to other women, is masculine and does not get GCS less of a trans woman, than a trans woman that is attracted to men, is very feminine in features voice and body, and has GCS?

[Ms. OBrien CVT]

Now big question:

Is a trans woman that is attracted to other women, is masculine and does not get GCS less of a trans woman, than a trans woman that is attracted to men, is very feminine in features voice and body, and has GCS?

Absolutely not.  There is no such thing as "less of a trans woman", just as there is no such thing as "less of a woman".

[AbraCadabra]

[clipped]

I see no difference between a cross dresser that feels they are a woman and does nothing more and a person that gets GCS and feels they are a woman.  That is their experience of life.  It is not correct or incorrect.  It is not better or worse.  It is not more woman or less woman.  It is their choice.

[clipped]

Hum, ... it is on opinion and quite blend of propositions to boot, yes? An opinion and proposition shared by many? I dare say NO.

Why? I think we all would know that as well.

Creating our own personalized reality like this is not always very helpful either, we soon find out when the 'rubber meets the road'.

Since the sun is green rather than yellow, and I'm naturally Napoleon's Josephine reborn..., let me try to fly this opinion by you.

Will you be able to imagine the general reaction to this, yes?

I'm sure you will want to support me in this opinion (you nice and supportive) it does not hurt anyone either, no?

I'm not too sure at all about most anyone else though

Maybe a case of... what we can't feel, we don't understand...

Axélle

[AbraCadabra]

I just wanted to say you look unbelievably pretty axelle!

Woopsy - how nice to say so! No more comments about de-transition then 

Just got me the nicest disqualification... 

Mwah,
Axélle