A Baby?!

[GypsySoul]

So, when my wife was my husband and before I ever knew her name I had to convince him that I wanted to have a baby. Granted this didnt take as much work as I had thought it would but still. So we tried for a few months and as soon as we realized the timing wasnt right ('He' had just lost his job like a week before the stick turned blue) it happened! 9 months later there was the 3rd in a line of C.M.S.'s. Our son. Now after we had him we agreed that we didnt want anymore kids. I had brought a daughter into our relationship from a previously failed one and we were happy with one of each. Yes there were sometimes those pangs of AWWW Baby! when I would pass a cute outfit or hear a newborn crying but it never really went further than wanting to hold one or smell that baby smell (not the yucky green smell but the sweet 'even though its been 3 days since you had a bath you still smell like Johnsons and Johnsons' smell).

NOW, this was all before my Wife came out to me and started hormones... and NOW, she is having horrible Awww Baby pangs. Like all the time! While I do find the thought of another little one pitter pattering around worth a nice long awww I dunno if I could deal with having another child like my son (Who just turned 2 and is a holy terror, I love him to death but there are days I honestly think he is trying to drive me to the loony bin). So I guess my question to you all is....

When your SO's started the change, and the hormones kicked in, did they go through the 'I want a BABY' phase? If so did it ever stop? Is it an I want a BABY like I want to be pregnant or is it more of a 'Lets have another baby' kind of thing? This bit is a bit confusing for me as I wasnt completely convinced that my 'husband' wanted to have a child the first time around and now there is heavy talk about another one!   

[blueconstancy]

My wife definitely got to what you're describing as the "awww, baby" stage (what you say *you* feel) after starting HRT, but nothing approaching that kind of baby craving. Which is good, because we don't have kids, I'm likely within sight of the end of my fertile lifespan and she's post-GRS with nothing banked, and I'm pretty solidly not interested myself at this point even if we could manage to convince someone to let us adopt. She does occasionally say it's making her sad to know she'd never be able to get pregnant, but she doesn't actually want to *have* a  baby, if that makes sense.

This also lessened with time - she's been on HRT about five years now - but then again, I dunno how much comparison there is to your situation. You have my sympathy... assuming that you're kind of wishing this phase would pass, that is.

[Catherine Sarah]

Hi GyspySoul,

If you want to hear it from the "horses mouth  " in answer to your question

So I guess my question to you all is....

When your SO's started the change, and the hormones kicked in, did they go through the 'I want a BABY' phase? If so did it ever stop? Is it an I want a BABY like I want to be pregnant or is it more of a 'Lets have another baby' kind of thing? This bit is a bit confusing for me as I wasn't completely convinced that my 'husband' wanted to have a child the first time around and now there is heavy talk about another one! 

Yes, my hormones have kicked in and absolutely unequivocally YES, "I want a baby, like  I want to be pregnant."  To date it hasn't stopped, and I can't see it stopping any time soon. It is my driving force in looking at every aspect of adoption. Whether surrogacy enters the equation is yet to be seen. And I'm serious about this.

May I suggest, if your SO is so adamant about the issue she would no doubt be the one to take full responsibility of the child's daily care and up bringing.   

The next 12 months should be an interesting time for you both as you navigate your way through the "terrible two" syndrome. That "nasty" neurological development time when the brain starts its transition from infant into child. I wish you both well. Could also be an interesting time for your SO in understanding what really happens. It'll certainly be a good litmus test for her "motherly" desires.

Hope this has helped in some way of trying to understand us. But yes these feelings ARE real. I absolutely love your following comment. It is so true.

but the sweet 'even though its been 3 days since you had a bath you still smell like Johnsons and Johnsons' smell

Hope everything keeps working for you both

Huggs
Catherine

[Ms. OBrien CVT]

Oh I definitely know about the "Awwww Baby".  My Daughter-in-law and son recently presented a beautiful little girl, My 12th grandchild.

And My grandson and granddaughter-in-law presented my first great grandson.  And I love all my children, grandchildren and great grandson.

And every time I walk past the baby stuff I am think that would look cute on Oliver or on Aryanna.

And the "terrible twos" shall pass.  But then comes the "terrifying threes".  But that to shall pass.  Eventually you will face the most terrifying of all, Teenager
Dum dum dummmmm

[Constance]

I had been envious of my wife when she was nursing our children. They would look so happy together.

So, yeah, I definitely am bothered by the fact that I'll never be pregnant or be able to nurse a child.