R-rated advice needed...

[gwwtbag]

This is probably the wrong forum, or perhaps crosses into areas that most are not willing to discuss, bu please don't take this to be a prurient post...

I'm a genetic male who, for various reasons, cannot transition into a female.  My female side remains 100% hidden from everyone else - a combination of family circumstances (wife and kids), a job that would absolutely not understand,  with a large dose of shame, but that's another post for another day.  I've come to terms with being the real me only in absolute private, with nobody looking or knowing, when nobody else is around.  It's not perfect, but those few moments, when I'm a she and not a he, are divine, and I hate returning to my exterior male body.

My one consolation is that inside, mentally, I am female, and I have been since elementary school, about thirty years ago now.  Inside, I live a completely different life.  And I'm happy this way - it's not ideal, but it's the best I can do.  Privately, where it matters, deep down, I'm female.

And I want to try to start bringing my femininity out in very private ways.  I want to ask a question that I'm rather ashamed of asking, but where else can I find this information out?

I want to ask about masturbation.  I hate my current equipment.  I despise it.  But I also know that in SRS, part of what I have now would be used to form a clitoris.  (I can't believe I'm asking this - I hope it's not already too disgusting.)

Which part of what I have now forms the clitoris?  And is there any way that I can, in my state of not being able to transition, use and manipulate that particular part alone to simulate a female orgasm?  I can't stand the mechanical, muscular, repetitive chore of sexual release with the male parts.  Is there any way I can use what I have, or parts of what I have, to achieve sexual satisfaction in a manner that approximates what a post-op female might feel?  I've tried (and again, sorry for the detail) using lots of lubricant and rubbing just the head with my fingertips as if it was a clitoris and not a glans, but this didn't do much for me - not even close to orgasm.  I don't know where to go from here.

Again, sorry to have to even ask this, but where else could I get this information?

Thanks!

[Sara Murphy]

Just because I am that person who likes to drop a little science on people whenever I can, here is the biology behind what you are asking.

There are three tissues in embryonic development that develop into the external genitalia.

Genital Tubercle

• Becomes glans of penis
• Becomes the clitoris

Urogenital Folds

• Encloses the urethra of a male
• Forms the labia minora of a female

Labioscrotal Folds

• Forms the scrotum
• Forms the labia majora

As far as what becomes what after SRS, well, I will leave that to someone else with more first hand knowledge.

[suzifrommd]

And is there any way that I can, in my state of not being able to transition, use and manipulate that particular part alone to simulate a female orgasm?

I sent you a PM with some ideas that might help - not sure I want to put the clinical details into a post. Please post in response to let me know you got it, since I don't know if you have enough posts to send a PM back.

[aprilrain]

You are asking to have your cake and eat it too that simply is not possible.  You can't have a female sexual experience with a testosterone dominated endocrine system. Just taking hormones will significantly change the way you think, feel about and experience sex. Surgery will change that even more.