Hi,
Emails are free and their are many places yu can get an email. Gmail, Hotmail, yahoo, etc. Being a transgender female, I know there is a lot of fear until you out yourself about how you will be treated by others. The hardest one to out yourself to is yourself. I guess the hardest responses for me were the ones, I didn't expect. I expected when I went out in public as myself, I would get a lot of looks of disapproval. I didn't expect acceptance. What I found is that, I just got a lot of indifference or avoidance. When I opened up and talked to people for the most part I didn't get negativity, but I was not sure if they thought of me as being either male or female except in a few instances.
From younger gets I get, "is that a" looks at times. But now my young son's friends come around for me to fill up air in their bike tires or footballs, and I am just the person who helps them out. I don't dress male any more, ever.
I guess you are going to find out what kind of a place you go to school in, if word gets around that you are trans. You will find out what your reality really is instead of what you fear it to be. I imagine it will be a mixture of the good, the bad, and the ugly and the just plain puzzling. People may be looking to you to find out how you want to be treated. They may be waiting for you to let them know if you are a male or a female.
But as a young person you will be deciding how you will live out your future and developing your legal status , rather than being an old person like me trying to decide how to integrate my present with my past especially since all of my legal past, 66 years, has the male stamp on it and the locations of these records are dispersed for lots of reasons.
You tube is a loose cannon, and there are lots of assumptions people can make from your favorites list. Your being transgender may well be the best assumption. The others could be down right weird depending upon the mental state and life experiences of the people reading your preferences.
Me coming from small town rural America, my life's experience is to tell people a little more than they really want to know or their imaginations will run wild. In the world I grew up in the rumors and stories spread about you which were based upon ignorance were always worse than what was really going on.
Kids these days are used to having both male and female avatars on the games they play so many of them may not read anything into your you tube favorites.
My view of middle school and high school life these days is, its like you are a bronc rider in the rodeo, trying to stay astride the wildest bronc on earth as long as you can before you bite the dust. Then you just have to get back on.
