To hell with Transphobia!!!

[K Style Addiction]

I am so sick and tired of seeing transphobic material whether it's on the internet or on the TV, i do everything i can not to see any transphobia to the best i can without stopping waching tv and surfing the net.

On comcast, they keep showing ad's for a show i find very transphobic "Portlandia". I also read rosseane barr tweeting about how "women don't want p*nises shuffed in their face in the bathroom". Like that's what he ->-bleeped-<-ing do, as WOMAN go to a WOMAN's bathroom to shuff our unfortunate apendage in ciswoman's faces....i mean girls, don't we just love that the fact we have penises so we can show it off?

I am so angry, i just hate the world that is so transphobic and i feel so hopeless about how my survival and life will be in a world like this, i just want to kill myself. Just take a gun put it to my hand and welcome nirvana, peace.

When will this really end? People have told me i could never be clocked but i feel (especially when i read or see this transphobic crap) like the whole world knows and has it's judgemental eyes on me.

->-bleeped-<- this world!!!! For once please leave comments i need to get this sadness off my mind 

[spacial]

The world has changed, so much, in my life time.

It will change more.

But only if the likes of you ans I stick around to do it.

[suzifrommd]

Makes me angry too.

It helps me to remind myself that I see the world in ways that no cis person ever will. With experience on both sides of the gender divide, I have perspectives that Ms. Barr and the other transphobes could never dream of.

[~RoadToTrista~]

Society is against us. Just learn not to dwell on it, it'll keep you sane.

[hazel]

The world has changed, so much, in my life time.

It will change more.

But only if the likes of you ans I stick around to do it.

This, I saw a photo on ->-bleeped-<- the other day (I've since lost it, if I can dig it up i'll post) from 1946 of two transgender woman sitting in prison, their crime? existing. Historically it's always been a terrible world for so many people who fit the bill of minority in one way or another, but it is getting better, there are setbacks to be sure progress doesn't move in an easy and straight line, but it does move, and it will move a lot faster if people like you stick around, we need you.

edit: found the pic and have to admit I couldn't find much context on it other than the date and the fact that they we're arrested, well I think my general point still stands but if anyone could clue me in on the legality of cross-dressing and such during earlier times I'd be interested to know.

[LilDevilOfPrada]

I honestly cant give a S*** what transphobic people say.

In my opinion anyone who has time to waste on hate speech obviously has a pretty pathetic life.So hey let them say what they want, after all everyone has to find a way make their life has some value.

And the fact that their lives value is hate for for something they cant understand isnt my problem.

[Shawn Sunshine]

This, I saw a photo on ->-bleeped-<- the other day (I've since lost it, if I can dig it up i'll post) from 1946 of two transgender woman sitting in prison, their crime? existing. Historically it's always been a terrible world for so many people who fit the bill of minority in one way or another, but it is getting better, there are setbacks to be sure progress doesn't move in an easy and straight line, but it does move, and it will move a lot faster if people like you stick around, we need you.

edit: found the pic and have to admit I couldn't find much context on it other than the date and the fact that they we're arrested, well I think my general point still stands but if anyone could clue me in on the legality of cross-dressing and such during earlier times I'd be interested to know.

There is a movie I watched about this subject:

Compton's Cafeteria was one of a chain of cafeterias, owned by Gene Compton, in San Francisco from the 1940s to the 1970s. The Tenderloin location of Compton's at 101 Taylor Street (at Turk)—open from 1954 to 1972—was one of the few places where transgender people could congregate publicly in the city, because they were unwelcome in gay bars. In addition, the cafeteria was open all hours until the riots occurred. Back then, transgender people were commonly referred to as Hair Fairies. Because cross-dressing was illegal at the time, police could use the presence of transgender people in a bar as a pretext for making a raid and closing the bar.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Compton's_Cafeteria_riot

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0464189/

[Incarnadine]

People are afraid of what they don't understand.  And many definitely don't understand us...

Heck, I don't even understand myself - maybe that's why I scream like a girl every time I see myself in the mirror!   

[Henna]

This, I saw a photo on ->-bleeped-<- the other day (I've since lost it, if I can dig it up i'll post) from 1946 of two transgender woman sitting in prison, their crime? existing. Historically it's always been a terrible world for so many people who fit the bill of minority in one way or another

When I told to my eighty year old grandmother about myself, she told a story about her home village in the 1930's, where there was a transgender woman (described by my grandmother as a man) who lived her whole life as a woman. She was accepted as part of the village and actually most of the other ladies were jelous of her, as she was much better at handicrafts than any other woman. She was most likely born around the turn of the century. My grandmother didn't know what happened to her, but unfortunately her end most likely was not that good due to the Second World War which started later.

I've since heard similar stories, that ->-bleeped-<- has been at least somewhat accepted, perhaps even more than nowadays.

[Elspeth]

edit: found the pic and have to admit I couldn't find much context on it other than the date and the fact that they we're arrested, well I think my general point still stands but if anyone could clue me in on the legality of cross-dressing and such during earlier times I'd be interested to know.

There were laws, mostly municipal statutes, that criminalized crossdressing in many parts of the US, at least, during that period and many were enforced as late (I think) as the Stonewall Riots (late 1960s) and harassment continues to this day in some areas, though it's less and less common now. Details can be found in many sources, transgender histories, as well as gay history books, and accounts that came out in the 1980s and onward about butch-femme dynamics. Marjorie Garber's Vested Interests covers a much longer period and covers multiple cultures on the subject of cross dressing and how it has been interpreted and treated in various cultures and cultural contexts.  Big overview, not so specific if your interest is the pre-Stonewall era and US culture in particular.

[Adam (birkin)]

The world has changed, so much, in my life time.

It will change more.

But only if the likes of you ans I stick around to do it.

This, very much this. My grandparents say this all the time - how they can't believe what a different world they live in. I'm only 23, but even in my lifetime I have seen changes. When I was a kid, there was a lot less GLBT visibility. I remember how sheltered my world was and how utterly terrifying life seemed, but I've noticed over the past 5 years, things have really looked up. Kids are more openly supportive of their peers' "difference." It's not perfect, but the strides seem huge from when I was in school.

Another thing to remember is that the media is not really an accurate representation of our society. Does it promote negative stereotypes and images? oh yeah. And it does have a big influence. But at the same time...people respond differently when they see a caricature on TV than they do when they see a real live person. The character in tv is impersonal. it doesn't have feelings. But when it comes to actually being faced with a trans person, there are people who would almost certainly mellow down any preconceptions they had because they see a flesh and blood person before them. There will always be idiots and bigots, but I truly believe most people aren't all that bad.

[K Style Addiction]

This, very much this. My grandparents say this all the time - how they can't believe what a different world they live in. I'm only 23, but even in my lifetime I have seen changes. When I was a kid, there was a lot less GLBT visibility. I remember how sheltered my world was and how utterly terrifying life seemed, but I've noticed over the past 5 years, things have really looked up. Kids are more openly supportive of their peers' "difference." It's not perfect, but the strides seem huge from when I was in school.

Another thing to remember is that the media is not really an accurate representation of our society. Does it promote negative stereotypes and images? oh yeah. And it does have a big influence. But at the same time...people respond differently when they see a caricature on TV than they do when they see a real live person. The character in tv is impersonal. it doesn't have feelings. But when it comes to actually being faced with a trans person, there are people who would almost certainly mellow down any preconceptions they had because they see a flesh and blood person before them. There will always be idiots and bigots, but I truly believe most people aren't all that bad.

It's nearly 4 AM in the morning and i am still up because while "watching" a movie and using my iPad i stumbled on this more or less gay website that talked about the sucsess and lack of (homophobia) in the LGBT movement or whatever.

I am so mad, i feel like the whole world is against me and i have almost hate for every living thing. I feel like i am losing it right now it's like why should i care about people when 99% they probably hate me;

a) before they get the chance to know me
b) if they knew who i really was

[Elspeth]

I am so mad, i feel like the whole world is against me and i have almost hate for every living thing. I feel like i am losing it right now it's like why should i care about people when 99% they probably hate me;

a) before they get the chance to know me
b) if they knew who i really was

It's toxic to think about "people in general" -- most of us (cis- or transgendered) tend to know only a few people really well. We might not like all of them, and some might not like us, but that's most often (the dislike) saying something about how well they like themselves. It's almost never actually about you or even about what labels people might try to stick on you.

Find individuals who are at ease with and confident about themselves, and allow them to get to know the real you. It's smart to be careful, but if you think nearly "everyone" is going to hate you, it can turn into a self-fulfilling prophesy. I'm divorced. My ex doesn't hate me. She just did not sign on to be married to a woman. We actually are pretty good friends at this point, even though the divorce did strain that friendship a lot.

[Felix]

I wasn't aware that Portlandia or Roseanne were transphobic but I'm pretty out of the loop and wouldn't be surprised. I've been repeatedly hurt by seemingly comfortable or innocuous sources revealing that they simply don't want us to exist. Often that's out of ignorance rather than malevolence but it damages either way and makes it hard to keep going. Try to hang in there and remember that a lot of the world does not have a problem with who you are.

[kelly_aus]

Can't say I've come across much in the way of transphobia in day to day life. I know it exists, but it doesn't seem to cause my life any issues..

[Brooke777]

Can't say I've come across much in the way of transphobia in day to day life. I know it exists, but it doesn't seem to cause my life any issues..

I have only come across it once, and it wasn't too bad. I sat next to a guy on the bus, he gave me a dirty look then got up and stood instead of sitting next to me. He didn't say anything, and just left it at that.

[Felix]

You two found some magic pixie dust or something. Maybe the culture is more accepting in the places you hang out and the sources of info you consume. That's not the standard experience for trans (or even gay) people so grats and I hope it continues.

[Brooke777]

You two found some magic pixie dust or something. Maybe the culture is more accepting in the places you hang out and the sources of info you consume. That's not the standard experience for trans (or even gay) people so grats and I hope it continues.

The Seattle area is a very accepting place over all. I thought Portland was the same?

[K Style Addiction]

San Francisco is supposed to be very accepting....it hasn't been unaccepting but thing is i don't know maybe the problem is me, i don't kow anyone here heh...stupid girl.

[Elspeth]

San Francisco is supposed to be very accepting....it hasn't been unaccepting but thing is i don't know maybe the problem is me, i don't kow anyone here heh...stupid girl.

I'm a homebody myself, in part because when we moved here I was taking care of small children, and all my energy and time that wasn't going into that was going into my writing. The part of NJ I live in is fairly accepting, especially of the gay and lesbian parts of LGBT.

But I do have to put myself out there and at risk if I'm going to meet and get to know others. A lot also depends on who you are looking to meet? Who do you want to have as friends, and perhaps lovers? And where are they most likely to be hanging out, where you could begin to spark a friendship?

Find some places, and not necessarily bars or such... something where the noise levels are low enough that you can have a real conversation with someone is often better than a bar. My therapist recommended support groups and groups focused on human rights or other issues as some of the main "meet markets" (yes, that's my intended spelling) -- especially for those of us somewhere in the LGBTQI spectrum.