What are you thinking right now? 4.0

[Tossu-sama]

Why did they change SnK's opening, whyyy... D:
It's utterly... boring. I shall love the first one forever.
Also I was right about Levi possibly becoming my fave character, he's fricking awesome.
Now I'm just wondering how I'm gonna survive yet another week while waiting for the next episode. @_@ Well, I gotta draw Titan Eren at some point...

You have no idea what kinda pain in the rear end it was to watch that episode... For some reason, this pc doesn't have working Flash on Firefox so I gotta use IE for videos etc. I almost threw the keyboard out the window. >__>

[Darkie]

My face is all greasy. DX EEeewwww. But too lazy to go wash itttt.

[Jamie D]

Thoughts, go away, there is no Sara, please, haunt somebody else, but not me.

If you deny the girl inside, she is going to get pissed, and make life miserable for you.

[Anna++]

Ooh!  There is finally an Orthanc LEGO set!  *purchases*

[Edge]

Pride is about a month away and whenever I think about it, I get very apprehensive. I don't feel welcome in that community. I still have flashbacks from the guy who attacked the trans group here since he used the same attacks as my dad which led to really bad flashbacks which made him a trigger. And he is sure to be there. He is everywhere in the LGB (I won't add T since I don't feel we're particularly welcome) community here and everyone seems to like him (which is also a trigger). Which is probably why he can get away with attacking the trans group and not even apologize or feel he has done anything wrong (also a trigger). If I had my way, anyone who attacked me or any groups I belong to would have to suffer with the consequences of their actions and not me. (And no, one cannot just "let it go" when one has flashbacks.)

[King Malachite]

I don't get my father.  He calls and gives me tips on how to be safe when meeting people online and I'm supposed to meet a guy today so I ask my dad to come along with me since there's power in numbers and he makes every excuse in the book not to...including how "I'm going into law enforcement so I need  to be more agressive."  I wish he'd stop saying that considering I'm not doing that.  I want to be a dishwasher.

[zombieinc]

I've always wanted to write a book and now...I am. At long last! The perfect blend of sci fi, drama and eroticism. 

[Keaira]

I got to thinking about this last night. I chatted with Azmaria about it for a little bit, but...

How is it, that, even when I was presenting as male, long before HRT, guys would find my attractive somehow? But damned if I could ever get the girl. I've had more guys say I love you than women, Lol. Worst. Lesbian. Ever.
Azmaria said, " Its because youre beautiful and strong."   
This doesnt cover why straight men were interested in me before I ever transitioned.
Ah well, its funny how life goes. After all, I didnt expect to be attracted to guys too in the end.
Wow, I'm pretty F***ed up. Lol.

[King Malachite]

I just got back from a couple of yardsales with my dad.  Since he knows I've been selling a few things here and there online from my room he wants me to upgrade my thinking by buying things to resale.  He brought two sample items for me to sale....a bed sheet set or something and a power painter.  I'm going to start with the bed sheet set first even though he told me I have 7 days to sell the power painter.  Hmmm

So I started out with the power painter and made just made $25 selling it today.  I pray that the man does not email me saying it doesn't work.  I plugged it in and gave it a dry fire and it seems to work.  It's really loud.  If the man doesn't email me back or complain to the moderator about me, then my father might be on to something.  I might have to start hitting up more yardsales and buying things to resale.  It could be a neat little way to save for top surgery.  If I'm not careful though, I could lose money but my father says I need to take a chance sometimes.  Hmmm, I need to sell that bed skirt next. 

I'm still hesitant putting that $25 in my top surgery fund in case the man wants a refund.  I made it very clear to him that I don't know anything about power painters so I can't guarantee anything 100 percent.  He seemed pretty happy and had a smile on his face, but we will see.

[CalmRage]

Rainbow Rising = Best Blackmore album

[Edge]

I'm watching this show called Grimm and there are these little details that are so heartwarming.

[Adam (birkin)]

I got to thinking about this last night. I chatted with Azmaria about it for a little bit, but...

How is it, that, even when I was presenting as male, long before HRT, guys would find my attractive somehow? But damned if I could ever get the girl. I've had more guys say I love you than women, Lol. Worst. Lesbian. Ever.
Azmaria said, " Its because youre beautiful and strong."   
This doesnt cover why straight men were interested in me before I ever transitioned.
Ah well, its funny how life goes. After all, I didnt expect to be attracted to guys too in the end.
Wow, I'm pretty F***ed up. Lol.

Lol, well, from what I gathered a lot of the guys  who were attracted to you pre-transition were guys who hadn't seen you, right? That sounds horrible lol, but I mean, you presented as female online. And there are more straight men than lesbian women. I think it was probably your personality. Like on the forum where you do graphics design, the posts you showed me, you come off as real no-BS. I think a lot of guys find that a turn on - the good ones respect it, and the questionable ones see it as a "challenge."

As for in real life, there might have been a few reasons why women didn't approach you. Post-transition, again, lesbians are few and far between. Pre-transition, I can see a lot of women finding you cute, but not really knowing how to approach you. Some girls may have found your being more of an effeminate guy to be a bit off-putting, but I don't think that's the case with most women. I think most straight women don't know how to approach guys who keep to themselves. After all, the socialization is that the man will take action (ask the girl out first, go for the first kiss, etc). That's changing but still very much a part of the general population's psyche, I think. So if they thought you were cute, they might have been afraid to say it.

Btw, it sounds like a lot of guys have said "I love you" to you. That's it. I'm hitting the gym and hunting these beaches down. -_-

[CalmRage]

Go away, leave me alone, don't bother me, i don't belong here, i just want to live my life,

[Tossu-sama]

I wonder how many can admit to their mom they're drawing smutty stuff with a straight face... Not to mention the weirdest dialogues me and my mom have.
I was watching that Seven Days of Sex (or whatever its original title is) from the tv when she jokingly said "eww" and I just replied to her "you've been made with sex, too!" She just proceeded to ask my stepdad "did you hear what that kid just said???" while laughing.

[spacerace]

Perception is not a very good TV show.

I will still watch every episode this season.

Why am I drawn to bad TV?

[Renee]

I feel completely useless.

[spacerace]

I feel completely useless.

You're not useless, no matter what.

You're useful to yourself.  Go take a walk, read a book, learn something by reading a random wikipedia page, whatever.  Then, even if in a small way - you are helping yourself and being useful.

[Keaira]

Lol, well, from what I gathered a lot of the guys  who were attracted to you pre-transition were guys who hadn't seen you, right? That sounds horrible lol, but I mean, you presented as female online. And there are more straight men than lesbian women. I think it was probably your personality. Like on the forum where you do graphics design, the posts you showed me, you come off as real no-BS. I think a lot of guys find that a turn on - the good ones respect it, and the questionable ones see it as a "challenge."

As for in real life, there might have been a few reasons why women didn't approach you. Post-transition, again, lesbians are few and far between. Pre-transition, I can see a lot of women finding you cute, but not really knowing how to approach you. Some girls may have found your being more of an effeminate guy to be a bit off-putting, but I don't think that's the case with most women. I think most straight women don't know how to approach guys who keep to themselves. After all, the socialization is that the man will take action (ask the girl out first, go for the first kiss, etc). That's changing but still very much a part of the general population's psyche, I think. So if they thought you were cute, they might have been afraid to say it.

Btw, it sounds like a lot of guys have said "I love you" to you. That's it. I'm hitting the gym and hunting these beaches down. -_-

LOL. You dont have to worry about Competition, because there isn't any ^_^

[DriftingCrow]

So I started out with the power painter and made just made $25 selling it today.  I pray that the man does not email me saying it doesn't work.  I plugged it in and gave it a dry fire and it seems to work.  It's really loud.  If the man doesn't email me back or complain to the moderator about me, then my father might be on to something.  I might have to start hitting up more yardsales and buying things to resale.  It could be a neat little way to save for top surgery.  If I'm not careful though, I could lose money but my father says I need to take a chance sometimes.  Hmmm, I need to sell that bed skirt next. 

One of my coworkers read up a lot about Coach purses so she can tell the difference between real ones and fakes, now she yardsales and looks specifically for coach purses. She can often buy them at the yardsale for around $10-25 and she sells them on ebay for $75+. I think you'll do good, especially if you can find some kind of specialty.

[CalmRage]

Things CalmRage should do more often #1:

Staying up all night quietly watching a concert movie

Things CalmRage should do more often #2:

Forget my anti-depressants

I can think, i can feel, Sara is shimmering through again. Funny, heh.

So tired, but watching that movie was sooooooo worth it.