**We are still using male pronouns**
Where do I start? My husband of 4 months (yes, we are young and very, very newly wed) came out to me about a month ago. Before we married he had admitted to me, in the way people do when they are drunk, that he had feelings of wanting to be a woman when he was younger, but made it sound like that wasn't the way he felt currently. I was okay with that. I had knowledge of the trans issue because I myself was, for the longest time, a lesbian and had just newly came into my bisexuality. Any group with a gender/sexuality "difference" (than that of cis-het people) I knew about. This. This fleeting feeling of wanting to be the other gender was not new or an issue for me. Piece of cake.
Then we married. Things were wonderful (and still are) but I noticed something. He would just look sad. There was an instance where we were at a restaurant and we were discussing Valentine's Day , I told him that we don't need to do anything and it was okay t not exchange presents but something inside of him welled up and he burst into tears. This was the first time I realized there was something more that I did not know.
Fast forward a month and a half, my husband (we will call him K from now on) told me that he felt that he was, indeed, a woman. I first met it with a combative attitude. Yes I support trans women as women but so help me my husband wasn't going to be one! I reached out to family and they suggested marriage counseling. It was through this (and it has only been two sessions so far) that I learned that so what if my husband is going to be my wife? I love women, it was just my fear of the unknown that made me feel so abrasive at first.
I am scared, but excited to teach my soon-to-be wife to put on makeup, wear flattering clothes, and be the beautiful woman I know he can be. But there are issues beyond that of finances. We are both military. So I know he will have to continue being 'he' for the rest of his enlistment, and if he wants to reenlist? Even longer.
This is a scary and lengthy process, but I am along for the ride. Any words of support or any resources I can read will be greatly appreciated. I'll use this thread as a journal of sorts so I can tell my story and hopefully get advice and support back. Maybe I'll even get to help someone else's partner out. Who knows?
