Do I Look, or Could I Pass, as Female?

[Danielle Emmalee]

Well they specifically know I am NOT transitioning.  I don't want to give anyone the impression I am when I am not.

I still don't quite get it but that's okay, I don't want to sidetrack this thread too much more. 

[Mortified_Penguin]

Hello. My name is Mortified_Penguin and I am new to this forum
I actually had two questions, and I was hoping the community might be able to answer

My first question is, could I hope to pass as a girl?
I am 18 years old. I am 5 foot 9 inches tall, and weigh roughly 130 lbs. I wear mens small of medium, US size 28 jeans, and US mens size 9 or 10 shoes
Here is a picture to help

(Pardon the acne: I have been having problem getting rid of it. I also have only been growing out my hair for a month now and I have yet to start any kind of HRT)

My second question is, Am I really a transsexual?
I first knew what a sex change was when I was between 11 and 12 years old, before i even knew what girls looked like under their clothes. Since then, I had this feeling that it would be really good to be a girl, but I never felt the unstoppable need to be a girl, partially due to being treated well by my family, not making a lot of my own decisions, and having never dated.
One thing that concerns me is my sexual fantasies, which I have had for many years. Most often, my sexual fantasies have consisted of sexual acts between two women, with myself being one of those women. This leaves me feeling guilty, for I fear my desire to be a girl is nothing more than sexual repression or something like that.
Only this July did the feelings get much much more powerful: I had to be a girl, it seemed. I have come out to a number of my friends about my feelings, and all so far have been quite supportive of my decision, whatever it might be. However, my parents continue to believe that I am simply confused, and that the idea of me being a girl is completely ridiculous and ludicrous. this leaves me scared that I am only confused, but what kind of man would want to be a woman anyway?

please reply and thank you very much
-Mortified_Penguin

[Alice Rogers]

The answer to your first question is a reserved yes
You have big expressive eyes, nicely shaped brows (assuming you havent already shaped them!)
Great sensuous lips for a male
Your facial shape works well I think too, my jaw is a little too strong which bothers me lots.

Your second question is a little harder but I think the obvious reply is that you should think about seeing a therapist, someone experienced in these matters and capable of helping you form and reach your OWN conclusions rather than those that others (including well meaning parents) might try to steer us towards.

The simple fact that you have these needs and thoughts in your head suggest to me that you should seek out help.

Confusion is VERY normal in this situation.

[sam79]

Ahhh, so young .

From your photo, there's little that could stop you from passing, although a tracheal shave might be desired. But this is the least of your concerns...

Are you really transgender? Nobody here can tell you that... The answer has to come from within. I highly recommend finding a gender therapist or therapist with gender related experience. A good therapist is easily worth their weight in gold.

Best of luck with everything!

[Marina mtf]

yes, you can easily pass. but this is not a good news. Most of men can pass,
unless they are very, very masculine, but they are a minority.

You could pass as a natal female, yes, your face is already a bit feminine, you
read androgynous now

The bad news is that this adds confusion to yourself, because your body is
clearly indicating to you that it has not decided where to go. But is this a confusion
because of the body of because of your inner self? This is hard to find.

Have you come out to anyone? Brothers? Sisters? Do you have someone whom you can
entirely trust?

[Danielle Emmalee]

your body is clearly indicating to you that it has not decided where to go.

Might be best to state that this is your own opinion and doesn't really have medical precedence.

[Marina mtf]

oh, yes. totally imho.

[Mortified_Penguin]

Have you come out to anyone? Brothers? Sisters? Do you have someone whom you can
entirely trust?

To Marina mtf,
As of now, I have come out to
my parents (but no one else in the family),
my counselor (she works for a business called Rainbow's End Counseling, so I can't say for sure if she is a licensed therapist or not),
and 2 of my closest friends (both girls, ages 18 and 16: my only real friends have been girls)
my town of 12,000 does not have a licensed gender therapist, so I am still working on finding a psychiatrist/psychologist that understand gender issues

[Lexi Belle]

To Marina mtf,
As of now, I have come out to
my parents (but no one else in the family),
my counselor (she works for a business called Rainbow's End Counseling, so I can't say for sure if she is a licensed therapist or not),
and 2 of my closest friends (both girls, ages 18 and 16: my only real friends have been girls)
my town of 12,000 does not have a licensed gender therapist, so I am still working on finding a psychiatrist/psychologist that understand gender issues

This is entirely opinion based, but I'm going to give this a shot.  You might be transgendered, but transsexual might NOT be where you'd want to go in your situation.  See a therapist when you can.

You might be someone who is attracted to themselves in the idea of being female, again, opinion not fact.  A lot of people seem to turn out to be this way, but again, opinions.

So what you REALLY need to do is find someone who can be able to tell you the completely blatant truth about your situation because going in on this based off of a sexual appeal is VERY dangerous and can potentially ruin your life. Literally.

[Jamie D]

Hello. My name is Mortified_Penguin and I am new to this forum
I actually had two questions, and I was hoping the community might be able to answer

My first question is, could I hope to pass as a girl?
I am 18 years old. I am 5 foot 9 inches tall, and weigh roughly 130 lbs. I wear mens small of medium, US size 28 jeans, and US mens size 9 or 10 shoes
Here is a picture to help

(Pardon the acne: I have been having problem getting rid of it. I also have only been growing out my hair for a month now and I have yet to start any kind of HRT)

My second question is, Am I really a transsexual?
I first knew what a sex change was when I was between 11 and 12 years old, before i even knew what girls looked like under their clothes. Since then, I had this feeling that it would be really good to be a girl, but I never felt the unstoppable need to be a girl, partially due to being treated well by my family, not making a lot of my own decisions, and having never dated.
One thing that concerns me is my sexual fantasies, which I have had for many years. Most often, my sexual fantasies have consisted of sexual acts between two women, with myself being one of those women. This leaves me feeling guilty, for I fear my desire to be a girl is nothing more than sexual repression or something like that.
Only this July did the feelings get much much more powerful: I had to be a girl, it seemed. I have come out to a number of my friends about my feelings, and all so far have been quite supportive of my decision, whatever it might be. However, my parents continue to believe that I am simply confused, and that the idea of me being a girl is completely ridiculous and ludicrous. this leaves me scared that I am only confused, but what kind of man would want to be a woman anyway?

please reply and thank you very much
-Mortified_Penguin

Penguin,

If you fall on the transgender spectrum, and where you fall on it, are questions only you can decide.

In my experience, people who do not sense gender dysphoria rarely ask themslves questions like you are asking.  Your self-awareness is a clue.

You are right to seek out some guidance and counseling.

As for "passing," take a look at the "Before & After" picture topic.  The transformations are sort of amazing.

[Violet Bloom]

This is entirely opinion based, but I'm going to give this a shot.  You might be transgendered, but transsexual might NOT be where you'd want to go in your situation.  See a therapist when you can.

You might be someone experiencing  ->-bleeped-<-, again, opinion not fact.   ->-bleeped-<- is when a man would be attracted to seeing themselves as women, usually due to a very potent attraction to the female body.  A LOT of people seem to turn out to be this, but again, opinions.

So what you REALLY need to do is find someone who can be able to tell you the completely blatant truth about your situation because going in on this based off of a sexual appeal is VERY dangerous and can potentially ruin your life. Literally.

  I will note my experience with my sexuality in case it helps.  For me seeing myself in my ideal body and being treated as such by a woman actually changed my physical sexual body response to stimulation.  Part of this requires near-elimination of erection to get past the male-type response.  I went from avoiding even thinking about sex because stimulation was so boring and unnatural to a true awakening of my sexual response.  Finding out what my body and mind were capable of BEFORE hormones was actually the LAST piece of the puzzle that set me on my current path.

  I also feel that the emotional part of a female-female bond is often unique.

[Lexi Belle]

  I will note my experience with my sexuality in case it helps.  For me seeing myself in my ideal body and being treated as such by a woman actually changed my physical sexual body response to stimulation.  Part of this requires near-elimination of erection to get past the male-type response.  I went from avoiding even thinking about sex because stimulation was so boring and unnatural to a true awakening of my sexual response.  Finding out what my body and mind were capable of BEFORE hormones was actually the LAST piece of the puzzle that set me on my current path.

  I also feel that the emotional part of a female-female bond is often unique.

Yes, I know of this. owo;
I've always felt detached from my bits I've never done anything with them really.
But what's this for? xD

[Violet Bloom]

Yes, I know of this. owo;
I've always felt detached from my bits I've never done anything with them really.
But what's this for? xD

  I always assumed it was a hand-crank for when you're having trouble getting the engine started:



  Much like a vintage car it's tempermental and requires everything to be setup just right.  That guy in the video seemed to 'get off' on it, but as for the car, I think the ol' girl is just along for the ride.

[sam79]

You might be someone who is attracted to themselves in the idea of being female, again, opinion not fact.  A lot of people seem to turn out to be this way, but again, opinions.

So what you REALLY need to do is find someone who can be able to tell you the completely blatant truth about your situation because going in on this based off of a sexual appeal is VERY dangerous and can potentially ruin your life. Literally.

This is so important to understand and get to the root of and was of real concern for me too...

I too sexually fantasised about being a woman after puberty. My intuition told me that this was more to do with the vast quantities of T roaming around than anything else. I was already aware that I wanted to be a girl pre-puberty. So I tried to ignore and break my post-puberty male sexuality for years as I got older, both because I hated performing the act as a male, and to try and find clarity that I thought a lack of sexuality brings. Sadly even after years I never broke it, and that felt somewhat awful too, feeling like a slave to my anatomy. While I could perform the act as male, it hurt emotionally every time making me feel wrong and horrible to my core. That feeling never left me, and was the proof ( to me ) that this wasn't just some sexual thing. Well that and all the copious amounts of non-sexual cues that happened pre and post-puberty .

Still, important stuff.

[Lexi Belle]

This is so important to understand and get to the root of and was of real concern for me too...

I too sexually fantasised about being a woman after puberty. My intuition told me that this was more to do with the vast quantities of T roaming around than anything else. I was already aware that I wanted to be a girl pre-puberty. So I tried to ignore and break my post-puberty male sexuality for years as I got older, both because I hated performing the act as a male, and to try and find clarity that I thought a lack of sexuality brings. Sadly even after years I never broke it, and that felt somewhat awful too, feeling like a slave to my anatomy. While I could perform the act as male, it hurt emotionally every time making me feel wrong and horrible to my core. That feeling never left me, and was the proof ( to me ) that this wasn't just some sexual thing. Well that and all the copious amounts of non-sexual cues that happened pre and post-puberty .

Still, important stuff.

That's no discredit to someone being trans at all, but it alone does not make someone a transsexual candidate as it can potentially bite them in the butt later.  I'm sure it can happen that a transsexual can be dysphoric of their gender AND find it appealing that they would become that gender, it's not really THAT exclusive but you need to be absolutely sure of your intentions in every way.

[sam79]

That's no discredit to someone being trans at all, but it alone does not make someone a transsexual candidate as it can potentially bite them in the butt later.  I'm sure it can happen that a transsexual can be dysphoric of their gender AND find it appealing that they would become that gender, it's not really THAT exclusive but you need to be absolutely sure of your intentions in every way.

Without doubt... Perhaps that is the first real difficult hurdle to overcome, especially for those so young.

Again, gender therapists!! 

[anjaq]

You might be transgendered, but transsexual might NOT be where you'd want to go in your situation. .....
You might be someone who is attracted to themselves in the idea of being female, again, opinion not fact.  A lot of people seem to turn out to be this way, but again, opinions.
....going in on this based off of a sexual appeal is VERY dangerous and can potentially ruin your life. Literally.

I would say that this definitely falls under the transgender umbrella, if TS or not - needs more personal exploration and prob. a gender therapist can help a lot.
I am not sure where you go with that a lot of people turn out "this way" an I suppose you talk about autogyaephilia there as well??? That warning seems to be a bit strong in response to the post - do you have experiences with these dangers, like in people you know?

Without doubt... Perhaps that is the first real difficult hurdle to overcome, especially for those so young.
Again, gender therapists!! 

Well 100% sure , i think that is impossible but to look at some steps to explore what is behind it and what may be the goal is good. Reversible things always are good to start with.

Re the passing question, I think it looks quite good. I love your large eyes, they are a great asset

[Red Leicester]

  I always assumed it was a hand-crank for when you're having trouble getting the engine started:

  Much like a vintage car it's temperamental and requires everything to be setup just right.  That guy in the video seemed to 'get off' on it, but as for the car, I think the ol' girl is just along for the ride.

Very good.  That made me laugh.

[Lexi Belle]

I would say that this definitely falls under the transgender umbrella, if TS or not - needs more personal exploration and prob. a gender therapist can help a lot.
I am not sure where you go with that a lot of people turn out "this way" an I suppose you talk about autogyaephilia there as well??? That warning seems to be a bit strong in response to the post - do you have experiences with these dangers, like in people you know?
Well 100% sure , i think that is impossible but to look at some steps to explore what is behind it and what may be the goal is good. Reversible things always are good to start with.

Re the passing question, I think it looks quite good. I love your large eyes, they are a great asset

When I say turn out this way, it's not like they are suddenly like that, sorry about the wording but I was NOT saying that this particular person was or is ->-bleeped-<-, I was saying there IS a possibility that they COULD be interested in a sexually arousing aspect of it towards them selves. SOLELY stating a possibility and in NO way saying that is what they were.  I was mainly making that statement to stress that there is a large need for people with these issues to see a therapist. This change is NOT a joke and can cause people without the dysphoria to have an EVEN GREATER dysphoria that could have been avoided.

[anjaq]

I was mainly making that statement to stress that there is a large need for people with these issues to see a therapist. This change is NOT a joke and can cause people without the dysphoria to have an EVEN GREATER dysphoria that could have been avoided.

Yes i agree on that - no rushing into it
Always step by step and when in doubt ask someone you trust.
Anyways - this thread is on passing and pictures - "Am i trans" - questions should probably better go in a different thread