How do you deal with being too short?

[em444]

Hi everyone. I'm still new around here (I have only posted in the "do I pass" thread). So basically I'm really short, especially for a guy, or even for anyone in general. I measure 5''2' sometimes even 5''1' and it drives me nuts! I feel like a dwarf, everyone around me (female and male!) is so much taller than me and basically I'm gonna look like a teen for the rest of my life (I'm a  bit of a Peter Pan syndrome person so I guess that could be good but it still bothers me). Like how do you even wear man clothing correctly when you are short like that? I'm also kind of fat so I have to wear wide clothes which means bigger clothes which proportionally means longer clothes and it's all really messy. I'd like to wear a proper suit at times but it just seems impossible. I'm planning on losing weight but I can't magically make myself taller. I'm 24 so it's not like I can keep growing xD. I do slouch but I feel like there's not much I can do abou it plus I'm not sure it would make that much of a difference. So what do you guys do? how do you deal with this?

[Jill F]

Lots of rock stars are about that height.  Way more than you think. Stand up straight, wear taller shoes and spike up the top of the hair as tall as you can.  Go to the gym.  Look at Glenn Danzig!  Being athletic and strong can really put you over the edge if you are diminuitive.

Then strap on a guitar and stand on a stage. (Kidding, but it helps you look taller!) 

[LordKAT]

My twins father comes up to mid chest on me. I'm between 5'5" and 5'6". Short is subjective, especially in the minds eye.

[em444]

Thank you both so much for answering! Jill F, I will definitely try all of those advices, although I really have trouble standing tall/straight, I have no idea why. Even sitting without bending my back feels super uncomfortable but I'll try to fix that  somehow and will definitely spike my head and try to exercize. ^_^ Again thank you both a  lot, LordKat I'm glad to hear there are other short guys out there, makes me feel better

[aleon515]

I am 5'1". This is actually close to being a Little Person. But I deal with it with humor mainly. There really is nothing to do about it. A little hair gel will only help with an illusion of height anyway and standing straight will only make you as tall as you actually are. But humor makes me feel happier. You're not tall, you're vertically challenged.

--Jay

[halfsleep]

I'm not happy about it - never have been even before I realized I might be transgender. But I accept it. What else can you do? I have been thinking of investing some of those shoes that make you taller, though - even a 2 or 3 inch boost would make me feel better (I'm 5'3".)

[LordKAT]

I tried lifts. It was like trying to walk in high heels. I dumped them.

[Cindy]

I tried lifts. It was like trying to walk in high heels. I dumped them.

A Kat in heels? I've heard of a puss in boots, but really!

Height is one of the things we can't change so we find ways around it, but remember, you are as big as your personality. And that is what people notice!

And as Jill said go to the gym!  I as told the other day that I was so fortunate that I was genetically thin, I told her my genes were comprised of a good diet and six hours a week in the gym!!

I took the attitude of a having a new body and a new life, then I'm going to make the most of it.

[LordKAT]

A Kat in heels? I've heard of a puss in boots, but really!

Exactly, it looked and felt ridiculous! Even my tail got shy about that one. Never again.

[chuck]

Just to be accurate - YOU can get taller with surgery. I dont think its something I would do, but it is an option for some. Me? I wear lifts. I am not tooo short to begin with but an inch or two gives me some confidence.

[Mr.X]

Hmm, deal with it? I don't think one can. I just accept it because I have to, but that's it. I'm 5,1 too, I think (American measurements, argh!) and I live in the land of giants (the Netherlands, average guy is at least 6' here. Women and men are almost always taller than I am) so yeah....It's all relative. It feels like a double stab from nature, making me trans and on top of that, way shorter than even the average female. I've been wondering if just moving away to a country that doesn't have giants would help.

In any case, just know life is not all about size. Sure it makes me dysphoric a lot of times because in my eyes, I'm a big, strong guy. But we can't all be big strong guys. Focus on your other assets and do not dwell on the things that you can not change. I try to keep telling myself that too, and most of the time, it helps to feel better.

[aleon515]

Hmm, deal with it? I don't think one can. I just accept it because I have to, but that's it. I'm 5,1 too, I think (American measurements, argh!) and I live in the land of giants (the Netherlands, average guy is at least 6' here. Women and men are almost always taller than I am) so yeah....It's all relative. It feels like a double stab from nature, making me trans and on top of that, way shorter than even the average female. I've been wondering if just moving away to a country that doesn't have giants would help.

I've found that now that I pass (mostly) guys accept me as a guy. It might keep me from passing sometimes as my build is also small--small frame and so on. But once I pass I am accepted as a guy. One of my friends is small too. He does work out a LOT and it helps him as he now has big shoulder muscles, but for me I could never do it to that extent. I work out to be healthy. But whatever helps.

--Jay

[Jared]

I just found this: 

[spacerace]

Boots help.

I got a good pair of boots after years of sneakers only that give me about an inch plus a bit without even realizing how much they would help me feel better about my height. I'm 5'4" to 5'5" I think, though I haven't been measured in awhile.

Me? I wear lifts. I am not tooo short to begin with but an inch or two gives me some confidence.

Honestly, I used to think that wearing lifts would make me feel like a silly faker and was more vain than I was willing to be on this particular issue...but now I am not so sure. The confidence increase I got from even the slight height increase wearing boots over sneakers gives makes me want to try a pair of lifts out at some point. With boots + another inch or so from lifts, I would feel pretty normal height wise.

I have never in my life wore a pair of high heels though (maybe once for half an hour or something), so it may be more annoying then it is worth. Lifts can't be great for your feet in the long term. Can you even drive easily with them in?

I also worry about just suddenly being taller randomly and having it noticed that I get way shorter without shoes, or having to take off shoes somewhere and the lifts just being in there for all to see. I wouldn't be ashamed of it per se, but it might actually make the whole height thing worse if I am constantly worrying about stuff like this - sorta the same reason I don't wear a packer, among other reasons.

keeping people like Charlie Day and Elijah Wood in mind helps - they are short and pull it off.

[Night Haven]

I'm barely scraping by 5', sometimes around 5'1.

How do I get by? I'm still young enough to hope that either I still have growing to do (unlikely), or I'll get T and still have some growing to do (also unlikely). Until the time passes where either of those things has happened or is confirmed to never happen, I don't have much anything I can do other than accept my stature.

Look around at similar threads - a lot of people point out that there are guys this short. I know quite a few either about my height, or only an inch or so above it; there are even a few I've seen who are shorter than me.

Like spacerace and others have said, boots help (mine give me another inch or so), and lifts help. Standing up straighter - I know, as lame as it sounds - does help, and it can build your self-esteem a bit (also from experience, as much as I doubted it).

[King Malachite]

I deal with it by strutting around like I'm a professional wrestler or MMA fighter thinking I could knock anyone out even from my height (even though that's FAR from the truth LOL).  I do try to look for short famous males or short fighters so I can look up to them.  I wish I was a lot taller and my height does bother me.  It has bothered me since middle school, especially in gym when I couldn't touch the basketball net but the other guys could.  Honestly, a lot of my dysphoria is there, but is shifted from to focusing on my weight, which is something that hopefuly can be corrected.  If I lost weight then I'm sure I'd feel much taller.

[AdamMLP]

I'm 5'2" as well, which is shorter than even most females I know.  Whenever I find someone shorter than me I always notice.  Like some people have said, in my head I think I'm much taller than what I really am, and it's a stab in the dysphoria every time I realise that I'm not.  Although it's not as obvious as the sizes of other parts of my body, hands and feet for example, although it's all in proportion to my height.  Feet have to be the worst though, shoes never look right in sizes that small, the toe section is too short.

What do I do about it?  Try and forget how short I am.  In group pictures I try and mess around so you can't see my height compared to others, in a recent one taken after we had a paintballing trip I ended up leaping on a mate's back in the middle of the photograph when I was pushed forward so that I could be seen.  In our group prom photo I knelt down at the front.  When I came down here it took until I said my name for two people to realise who I was even though they'd been looking through photographs of me on facebook, I just appeared so much taller on there by my mannerisms when there was nothing to compare me to.

[em444]

Thank you all so so much for answering, you are awesome! I don't even know where to start answering or whether I should answer you all individually by quoting. I never got the e-mails saying you had replied to this particular thread so I had no idea xD that's why I hadn't answered. I really liked what all of you said and I will definitely try to focus more on personality. It will probably still be hard, having to look up to talk to some people and stuff xD but as aleon515 said I'll try to take it with as much humor as possible. I'm open to try the idea of  lifts, although I'm not sure it would work since I mostly wear flip flops (I used to wear mostly snickers than even that somehow became too much work xD I live in the sun so I don't know), also I'm super clumsy in general and sensitive to this kind of changes. Someone mentioned surgery, how is that surgery called? just curious, I don't think I could get it since I'm totally afraid (it's kind  of a phobia actually) of surgeries, doctors, needles etc which is one of the reasons I might not be able to medically transition, let alone get taller, but it's good to know my options anyway Malachite I see we have a lot in commun. Anyway, thank you all, you are amazing and have been super helpful ^_^ I wish I could have answered as you wrote.

[em444]

AlexanderC I know exactly what you mean. I have very small feet too (as in VERY small xD) it hasn't bothered me as much as my height, but it can sometimes be pretty annoying, everything is just so weird in me xD.

[ryanjoseph]

personally i've never been that bothered by it. i'm around 5'4 and a lot of cis dudes i know are around that height, so it makes me feel better about myself.
though i do tend to wear shoes that make me look a bit taller. haha.