I have to be entirely honest with you and say before I say anything else that it is highly unlikely that, within our lifetimes, a fully functioning (ejaculating -with- sperm) penis will be able to be grown/implanted onto any of us.
Phalloplasty exists, yes, and the results are actually pretty stunningly nice. They'll get better with time, of course, but... just don't do a disservice to yourself in hoping for the ability to impregnate. That's science that may as well be light years away for any of us currently breathing.
Transitioning is hard, expensive and stressful. Those things will always ring true no matter what age you are.
Have you been to see a gender therapist at all concerning your issues? It sounds like you may greatly benefit from seeing one.
The one good thing about T is that it tends to add instead of subtract features (stronger jawlines, muscle bulk, more defined features, facial hair, etc) so passing after being on it for a couple years typically isn't an issue at all even for guys that start older.
It's okay to be scared. I'm still scared about all of this, truthfully, and I'm more than a decade older than you. The fear of the unknown, the terror of the 'what if' scenarios, the anxiety of uncertainty--they're louder now than ever in my head.
You're not a cis-man (as much as that would make all of our lives easier), but you're certainly no less of a man. We just have to go through a few more trials and tribulations than our cis bros.
