As many others here already know, I am a long term transitioner. I started HRT in Sept 2008 and, after about two years stop-go, I have continued uninterrupted since Sept 2010. I also did a very complete FFS in two steps, upper face in 2011 and lower face in 2012 plus facial hair removal and hair transplants.
Today, I am out to everyone who counts in my life, including my boss and all of my peers in the management team of the company I work for,live 100% as a woman in my private life yet to continue to have to present as a guy at work until my civil identity change comes through, a very drawn out process here in France. Hopefully it will come through next spring at the latest and if it doesn't (result depends very much on the judge), I could be stuck in limbo for a long time to come as my employer won't let me transition on the job unless my civil identity is aligned with my gender identity.
Is it fun, no, but I really have no other choice and that helps focus the mind. Interestingly, in spite of the fact that I am very much in male fail mode with third parties and while my appearance (including long hair worn in a ponytail) is very, very unusual for either a guy or a senior manager in a fairly large company, my experience to date suggests that no one at work has guessed at the reality behind what they see before I have told them. However, when I have told them, many have said that they had already picked up on the fact that personality wise my behaviours and attitudes were noticeably feminine.
Like others have mentioned, having to present as a guy on Monday mornings after a weekend living as a woman or coming back from a two week vacation, as happened recently, is momentarily depressing but I am so busy at work that I really don't have time to dwell on it.
Also, I push dress codes to the limits, mostly wearing andryogenous female clothes, pullovers, blouses, pants & shoes, plus everthing underneath. Most of all, as I now unambiguously see the woman myself and since I don't attempt to behave in any manner that is not me, no matter how I have to present for now , deep down inside me I know that it is only a question of time.
That being said, when that day finally comes I will definitely be throwing a party as it has been a very, very long road with many ups and downs which I probably would not have been able to handle as I did without the most extraordinary support of my dearly loved wife. I owe her so much for being always there with me, always steadfast and solid as a rock. Having such a person beside you makes a huge difference under any circomstances and even more so during a long transition.
Hope this provides another perspective compared to some of the other posts.
Hugs
Donna
P.S. I should probably also mention that I did not come out to anyone other than my wife before doing my first FFS surgery in 2011, only my children immediately after this and most other people only after my second surgery in 2012. I think that without this precaution I could never have done as I did as coming out creates expectations that you then have to live with.
My slow approach also certainly contributed to insuring that I have been able to preserve almost all of the important relationships in my life: wife, kids (from a first mariage), my siblings (apart from one) and my friends.
