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so are you a woman with out the operation

Started by evecrook, December 20, 2013, 06:00:14 PM

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evecrook

There seems to be a curious debate about how far you need to go to validate your woman hood. I just started HRT and I already feel like a woman. I don't know . Ideally I'd like to accomplish what has all ways been in me. Hopefully I can. Is it really important where your finish line is.
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Lauren5

It clearly depends on your perception of yourself. I'm pre-everything, and only dress part time, but I consider myself a woman.
Hey, you've reached Lauren's signature! If you have any questions, want to talk, or just need a shoulder to cry on, leave me a message, and I'll get back to you.
*beep*

Full time: 12/12/13
Started hormones: 26/3/14
FFS: No clue, winter/spring 2014/15 maybe?
SRS: winter/spring 2014/15?
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Oriah

being a woman is a state of mind, not a state of body, if you ask me.
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Devlyn

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Oriah

Thanks Devlyn!  I'm liking yours too.  What a cute little mousey.
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Carrie Liz

Of course! Not everyone wants the surgery, nor should everyone get it. Gender is a social construct. It's about how one interacts with the world, not about what's between your legs.
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Miss_Bungle1991

Quote from: Oriah on December 20, 2013, 06:07:32 PM
being a woman is a state of mind, not a state of body, if you ask me.

I say do what makes you happy and screw what anyone else thinks. That goes for both the transphobic types and the "more trans than you" crowd.
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Jamie D

Quote from: evecrook on December 20, 2013, 06:00:14 PM
There seems to be a curious debate about how far you need to go to validate your woman hood. I just started HRT and I already feel like a woman. I don't know . Ideally I'd like to accomplish what has all ways been in me. Hopefully I can. Is it really important where your finish line is.

There should be no debate.  Transition is individualized.
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nonameyet

im glad that you posed the question cause it seems to bring a more blunt and forward air to the answers people give.

personally i think that it probably has a lot to do with genetic or not (how you percieve the question) balls dont make a man. nor does muscle. and i would say being needlessly violent ( or just plain violent where women are concerned) makes you not a man period. nor a woman.

same with women. a vagina doesnt make a woman.

thats my view as a man. as a tomboy with girlish tendencies ( heehee. lets see a therapist deal with that one) id say ultimately it should be irrelevant. and therefore is a matter of preference and perception. i just think the waters murkier for identifying as a man. simply really for the violence against women issue. men who commit violence against women arent men.

anyway. my 2 pennies
Just delete my profile. im done with this site.
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Missy~rmdlm

I think it's fuzzy at this point, I'll have to say I'm way past being a guy, and I have never identified as androgynous, I guess that makes me a lady.

I do have some personal hangups such as: I would not snag a guy at a local bar to bring home pre-op.
I tend to be far more private than an average lady in ladies spaces, then again I hid back in males spaces too, as I hated my body.
For example I always hoped no one in the mens locker room noticed I shaved my whole body, despite really hating the hair enough I have been doing that for twenty years. Until just a few years ago, a hairless male was gauche.
I really desire to have female type sexual activity, but I don't ignore my sexuality currently either. I almost consider it a pragmatic maintenance thing, so there isn't too much atrophy to deal with at SRS, after all I will have a daily maintenance as post-op too.
I'm not contraindicated as female by being a sentimental, melancholy, and empathetic person.
In short, this isn't guy perception, this isn't guy behavior, this isn't gay guy either, it's indeed as a lady I proceed.
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Jill F

Some women are perfectly content without getting surgery.  After all your gender is between your ears, not your legs.   A few years ago, a transphobic guy told me that if you have a penis, you're a man, period the end.  If you don't, you're a woman and that's all there is to it.   I had to ask him if he'd suddenly identify as a woman if his was ever bitten off.

My nuts are out the window in 3 months or so.  Ask me if that's enough when it happens.
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~RoadToTrista~

Quote from: Jill F on December 20, 2013, 07:43:46 PM
A few years ago, a transphobic guy told me that if you have a penis, you're a man, period the end.  If you don't, you're a woman and that's all there is to it.   I had to ask him if he'd suddenly identify as a woman if his was ever bitten off.

Lol that reminds me of a part in Calpernia Addams's video.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DjqsB1huDxg&feature=player_detailpage#t=520
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Katie

Thinking I am going to get five or so t shirts that say "I am a zebra", the next one will say "I am a turtle", the next one will say "I am a rino", ect., ect. I will wear them on different days and  I will walk around and tell people that I am that animal that my shirt says I am. Remember I am whatever I think I am because its in my head. Never mind that not one person will believe me if I tell them I am a zebra. LOL.

Crap come to think of it........since we are whatever we say we are why the hell do we even transition? I mean we can present to the world a boy and tell everyone we are a woman.....It would save a ton of money and hard work.

Remember is all in your head!

Katie
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Tori

Gender is mental. It has to do with how one views themself, but it also has to do with how others view a person.


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Devlyn

No one cares about your bigoted views. Hugs, Devlyn
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Isabelle

A lot of transsexuals cant have "the op" for a lot of reasons, A lot simply dont want it.
A persons surgical status is meaningless

I'm currently pre-op, I intend on having srs but, the fact I haven't had it yet doesn't make me any less of a girl. And, if I never have it, I'll still be a girl. I always was and will be, that's what being born transsexual means.
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Miss_Bungle1991

Quote from: Katie on December 20, 2013, 08:36:49 PM
Thinking I am going to get five or so t shirts that say "I am a zebra", the next one will say "I am a turtle", the next one will say "I am a rino", ect., ect. I will wear them on different days and  I will walk around and tell people that I am that animal that my shirt says I am. Remember I am whatever I think I am because its in my head. Never mind that not one person will believe me if I tell them I am a zebra. LOL.

Crap come to think of it........since we are whatever we say we are why the hell do we even transition? I mean we can present to the world a boy and tell everyone we are a woman.....It would save a ton of money and hard work.

Remember is all in your head!

Katie

You do realize that some transphobic types use that same argument against transpeople that.... :o....have had GRS done? There are plenty of people that don't give a damn about how much money you spent to "mutilate your body" (as they often see it), you are still a man in their eyes. So, what is the point of ragging on transwomen that haven't had surgery? You DO realize that they lump us all in the same boat despite what you want to keep telling yourself?
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ashrock

Awwww, and the drama started... Come on, there is no need... pretty well answered already I think, its an individuals prerogative.  And not to feed any trolling, but that has no application at all to this topic katie
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nonameyet

@ katie. since gender roles are an evolutionary function brought on by hunter gatherer needs and functions and probably accentuated with things like jewelry and clothing as a form of marking individual women as territory ( no source but seriously. think about it. )its irrelevant anyway. were all assigning meaning and purpose to something that is purely evolutionary and to throw venom into the conversation is unnecessary.

though you arent the only one and i feel like maybe you were joking.
also. she was expressing her opinion. as a pre op ( maybe never op) chick i can identify with that viewpoint. the venom isnt necessary from anyone. though its refreshing to see open opinions without the dampening of harsh points come on. be blunt. but keep it friendly. if we cant even get along whats the point in a discussion  forum. i think thats part of the reason my topic got locked. i dont even wanna check
@ ash actually its spot on. good point made with a bad metaphor



@ tori
i think it has more to do now with whats expected of you by society. not how they view you.
Just delete my profile. im done with this site.
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ashrock

Honestly, no, no its not just a bad metaphor...this is more than a I'm putting on a tshirt to prove a point, at least to me
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