Could they come around in the end?

[Paige0000]

Hi everyone I'm back after a horrible horrible day yesterday. Never have I been so sick and in so much physical pain! Thank god it was only a 24hr bug 

Anyway on topic I had a talk with my Therapist and my GP over the past couple weeks and I told them of my family's (Parents, sister and Granparents) continuous refusal to use the proper pronouns and proper name (especially now that I'm legally Paige Leoni Hodges and I have my srs surgery booked, payed for and set in stone).

I mean I can understand it being hard for them, especially dad but I'm starting to get to the stage that I feel if they haven't tried to accept me fully at this point then they will never truely accept me for me (I mean even when I told mom my name was legally Paige now she stated doesn't matter I'm still going to call you P. B (P. B short for my old first and middle name). Also I asked my sister if she could at least try calling me Paige and she said she would try but since then not once has she attempted to do so. My therapist and GP assured me that they will come around in the end and I desperately want to believe they will (I mean they love me to death I know that very well and they know how much happier I am now) but I'm honestly feeling it will never be the case. I mean if they can't even try calling me by the proper pronouns or name even when I'm had them legally changed, been full time for nearly 3 months and am fully accepted as a female by my friends and society, how can I expect them to fully come around in the end?

Is it possible because I dearly hope so xx 

[LizMarie]

You can not expect them to come around. They may. They may not.

But never ever expect it.

Yesterday my newest grandchild was born. I was specifically told that I was not welcome at the hospital, by my own children. Even after 18 months, I still grieve each time they reaffirm their rejection of me. I can never expect them to come around and I have to live my own life, despite everything I've done for them, since before they were born, until now in their fourth decades each, and their rejection of all of that, to the point that I essentially no longer exist to them.

Yet I consider my alternatives and I refuse to walk back down that dark road again, to find myself at the edge of that precipice planning my own death. I refuse to go there. And if the only way they can accept me is if I walk that road, to my own death, that's their choice. It's their rejection of me, not me of them. I didn't do this. They did.

You aren't rejecting them, Paige. They are rejecting you. Only you can decide if the price of being yourself is worth what may be permanent rejection.

They may come around someday. Just don't ever plan on it.

[Nicolette]

Three months full-time and they haven't come around yet? Hell, I hadn't come around to myself after a couple of years full-time. Three months are no way enough to be able to predict the outcome. Being young will help. Looking the part helps too. Their own upbringing and education may give hints as to whether they will eventually accept you.

My own misogynistic, macho and traditional Italian father accepted me after he was allowed to grieve a little and was helped by my very liberal and understanding mother who educated him and even took him to a Spanish gender therapist who expounded the wonderful, multi-coloured tapestry that life is, in his own "language". My Dad, only just the other week, accidentally referred to me with the Italian male pronoun. He was absolutely mortified when I made him realise what he had done. It has been 19 years though. My mother, though, has never ever made a mistake since after a year or so.

Give them more time. They'll probably get there eventually.