lost my best friend and having issues with other friends:-(

[Sophia Hawke]

Let me start off by saying I use the word friend loosely.  So, I ended my friendship with my best friend after a series of ->-bleeped-<-ty events.  I've been dealing with a guy who was a mutual friend of ours ever since I started transitioning.  He got very scary and creepy and would come over and grab me and wouldn't let go when I told him to get off me.  The end result of this was him doing it to me in front of my brother and the local bar and brother(whose as deadly as they come with the credentials to match) punching him (and I never saw someone do a double back flip from a punch before). 
Anyways, things were strained between me and my bf already at this point.  And I'd been getting pretty tired of always being the one trying to hang out and never being hit up to hang out unless nobody else was around.  Well one night after the drama with this guy she told me(granted I was complaining about him.) That she didn't care about what happened and she would always take his side no matter what.  I was so sad I text her later that we weren't friends anymore and she never even had anything to say to me. 

I just can't believe that my best friend would tell me that I was less of a friend to her than someone who would hurt me, and let me be clear, I really thought this guy was going to try to rape me.

I'm really sad though that I lost my best friend and I have to see her everyday when I work. I'm now also questioning my other friendships.  Lots of people say they are my friends but nobody ever hits me up to hangout, ever.  Only, like one girl I know does, and a guy I'm sleeping with but that's different.  I really dont know what to think.

[Jessica Merriman]

I am so sorry you were attacked like this. You are far too special to be a grope for someone like that. I don't understand why some people feel the need to do things like this. If your best friend would not support you in this situation then you don't need her. I know it is easy for me to say that because I don't have the emotional and familiar bond you shared, but a true friend would have helped you, not blamed or not supported you. I hope you don't blame yourself for the breakup of this friendship at all. You were the unsupported victim here. I am glad someone did take care of this guy for you. Kudos to him! I hope things look up for you quickly and you find true and loyal friends.

[TerriT]

Who cares. That sounds like a ->-bleeped-<-ty person anyway. You can meet better people if you want. Getting sucky people out of your life will just make things easier.

[Ms Grace]

Really sorry to hear that, hon - that guy sounds like a total douche and if your now ex-bf still wants to hang out with him and take his side it's for the best you put some distance between them both. Chances are she might eventually see him for who/what he is and come around to your way of thinking but until then it sounds like time for some new friends.

[Alexmakenoise]

I've gone through some similar things, including something I'm dealing with right now, so I can relate.  After enough experiences like this, I learned that you have to be proactive about who your friends are.  Cut the negative people out of your life and actively seek out good people.  If you're not outgoing enough to have an easy time meeting new people, try playing music, making art, or some other activity that will bring good people to you.  It's a process, but the more good things you do, the more good people you'll meet and the more choices you'll have about who to hang out with.

[Jamie D]

Let me start off by saying I use the word friend loosely.  So, I ended my friendship with my best friend after a series of ->-bleeped-<-ty events.  I've been dealing with a guy who was a mutual friend of ours ever since I started transitioning.  He got very scary and creepy and would come over and grab me and wouldn't let go when I told him to get off me.  The end result of this was him doing it to me in front of my brother and the local bar and brother (whose as deadly as they come with the credentials to match) punching him (and I never saw someone do a double back flip from a punch before). 

Anyways, things were strained between me and my bf already at this point.  And I'd been getting pretty tired of always being the one trying to hang out and never being hit up to hang out unless nobody else was around.  Well one night after the drama with this guy she told me (granted I was complaining about him.) That she didn't care about what happened and she would always take his side no matter what.  I was so sad I text her later that we weren't friends anymore and she never even had anything to say to me. 

I just can't believe that my best friend would tell me that I was less of a friend to her than someone who would hurt me, and let me be clear, I really thought this guy was going to try to rape me.

I'm really sad though that I lost my best friend and I have to see her everyday when I work. I'm now also questioning my other friendships.  Lots of people say they are my friends but nobody ever hits me up to hangout, ever.  Only, like one girl I know does, and a guy I'm sleeping with but that's different.  I really dont know what to think.

Doing what?  Even just grabbing you can be sexual assault.  You should have reported the incident to the cops.

If your ex-best friend would side with a criminal, then cut her loose.  She's bad news.

[Sophia Hawke]

Update, I was going to put things on the mend with her but I later read what you guys wrote and said screw it.   Most for the various reasons you mentioned.  Not gonna waste my time on people who do t have time or any respect for me.

[Jessica Merriman]

Sorry it worked out like it did, but I admire your attitude with it. You are special and intelligent and deserve friends who will support you, not hold you back or hurt you. Good luck Sophia! Always remember, you still have us.

[TerriT]

Right on Sophie! Rock on girl.

[Ms Grace]

The right move...let her come to you if and when she realises what a douche that guy is.

[Ltl89]

I can't believe your friend wouldn't stick up for you.  It sounds like you made the right move as that's not the sort crowd I'd want to be involved in.

[Sophia Hawke]

Yeah, there aren't many people here.  So I've kinda isolated myself now.

[Alexmakenoise]

That sucks.  I'm in a similar situation, if it's any comfort.  I recently cut some toxic people out of my life and now I have to rebuild while feeling isolated.

[Sophia Hawke]

Yeah I just dont care anymore.  Screw em.  Tired of being that person who hits everyone up.  And nobody ever wants to chill.  And if they its cause nobody else is around.

[Jamie D]

Yeah I just dont care anymore.  Screw em.  Tired of being that person who hits everyone up.  And nobody ever wants to chill.  And if they its cause nobody else is around.

Too bad you aren't in SoCal.  We could p-a-r-t-y on the beach.