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[rant] biologically determined trans-ness and the rest of us

Started by Asche, August 10, 2014, 08:53:17 AM

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ativan

Quote from: Satinjoy on August 14, 2014, 11:09:12 AM
First, it greives me deeply to see my good friend Ativan's bitterness on the religious right.  50 purges later, in this specific issue of trans, I feel they are the religious wrong and have aligned themselves with the pharisitic element of Christ's day.  If I thought I was excluded since I am trans, you would see this mind implode on itself with desperate consequences.  I am conservative, and I believe we are not excluded.  If there are denominations that do, so be it.  Some conservatives deny the living Christ and His Spirit can indwell and manifest in us in ways that are gifts and unexplainable otherwise.  IMO, because that manifestation happens with me, they live in error, and they grieve the One who died for them to be with Him.

Nuff said there.  Wanna get me angry?  Preach exclusion and delusion.  Short circuit the heart of God through misunderstanding.

But these items are typically addressed and addressed very well in the Christianity forum. 
Indeed.
But I see nothing religious of the self proclaimed religious right.
I live in Bachmanns district.
I have driven past the club house for the hate group she supports whose leader has made public claims from his little radio show that queers and Muslims should be killed.
They have recently vacated their clubhouse, nobody supports them as they once did.
'You Can Run But You Can't Hide' was all about and still is a self proclaimed group that uses the pretense of religion to spew their hatred throughout the community and they are supported by the leader of the radical so called 'religious' right in this country.
To refer to them isn't a reference to regions at all, but a reference to those who would kill you in their lies that they spew while hiding behind claims that they are a religious kind of people.
This very same group pays no taxes by claiming to be a church, yet none exists.
They hold no prayer or any other kind of meetings.
They do however beg for money and people fall for it because they believe they are donating to a religious group.
They are nothing more than bigots who say you and me and many others deserve to be killed and should be killed.
That is the religious right, to confuse them with actual religion is a mistake, anyone can claim to be religious, but when they spew hatred at every twist and turn, much like Bachmann and those who follow her, it is a grand mistake of epic proportions to even think that they are religious in any way or fashion.

The Clubhouse was vacated, because they don't have the money to support this band of pure evil.
A company that sells used office furniture has taken up residence in 1/3 of the building, the middle third looks like it is going to be turned into and '80's style arcade place and the remaining third is open.
I'm thinking that it would make a very good LGBT center, but I'm more inclined to see it a Trans Center instead.
Politics suck and those who use religion to base their policies on are dying out.
The so called community of LGBT has been divided by politics and as such isn't a community at all.
It's a label, a term. One that is used by those so called 'religious' hate groups and politicians who have no concept of the freedom of religion because they have no concept of what a true religion is...
A Trans Center would be appropriate in place of something as insidious as a radical 'religious' right hate group.
I have no time and no desire to discuss anyone's religious beliefs.
They are yours, a personal thing.
But when they make it everyone's business by using politics to further their cause of evil and hate, it's everyone business.

You all have all the right to any religious view you want, but don't push it on me, don't make yours better than mine.
None of you have any idea what my religious beliefs really are and I think many here would be surprised at what they are.
I've been through that valley of the shadows and won.
To make any kind of reference to my religious beliefs, you had better be able to say you have done the same.
Bitterness? They are the shadows in that valley along with many others who claim to be religious and use that claim to destroy lives.
To literally be in that valley and to be able to have walked back out of it after winning by becoming the very shadows that are there, as a way to survive...
There's a lot I could say about most peoples levels of religious beliefs...
Nobody knows the levels mine are at and where they come from.
Nobody knows the deepness of my convictions and how they came to be...
But I do know how the so called 'religious' right have taken the very term religion and ruin it for the world.
Much like they have ruined the word patriot...
I have no bitterness towards any true religious beliefs and what they stand for.
I have a huge bitterness towards those who stole the meaning of religion and ruined the meaning of it for everyone, a very huge bitterness.
Can I forgive them?
It isn't anyone's business as to whether I can and would.
The bitterness lies in that valley, it comes from that valley...
There are feelings that I have to deal with almost everyday about it.
And yet my convictions are strong because of them.
Where do any of yours come from?
Have they been tested to the extremes of life itself?
I earned my convictions, I didn't learn them by listening to anyone elses, although I have listened and do listen...
My bitterness is a part of my convictions and nobody has a right to draw any conclusions about them.
If you have earned yours by the trial of living with death itself and have stood up against it, then you can claim to know yours as I have mine.
Then you know how deeply a conviction can be held, and how it is found in the depths of your own personal hell of life and death that you have survived.
Are my convictions related to religious belief?
That's hardly the point, but my convictions about it are stronger than those who would use 'religion' to kill, to spread the evilness that they use religion for.
My convictions are strong enough to pick any of you up and carry you forward, even if I literally have to and can.
My convictions are that there is always a way to move forward.
I do this in my very personal life as well as here, I hope you know this.
Many things drive this in me and it's true that a part of it is bitter.
It just drives all the harder in my convictions of what I have a belief in.

Right now I'm leaving to help someone here to move forward once again.
To help them to believe in themselves that they can move forward in bigger and better ways.
They have a plan and want me to be a part of it.
Of course I will. I'm the safety net as well as the one who originated their idea that they can.
They want my conviction that they can move in these ways, they are asking me to once again share that with them.
How could I possibly turn that down?
It's partially fueled by a bitterness, it's true, but that in turn is converted into a happiness that can't be denied.
Ativan
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Satinjoy

Good heavens I sure didn't mean to trigger that.

Frankly I don't know Bachman or anything about her, and I have clearly stepped into a place I have no wish to go into or disturb.

I do share from the heart how it works for me, and I get passionate.

As to the hate stuff, nobody has room for that in our lives, and I can't stand it either.  Nor can I stand the mental torture I went through trying not to be trans because I thought it was wrong to be trans, was told it was wrong, was told I had a choice, was told I had a devil inside me.  Far from it.   

So sorry to trigger you Ativan, you know how much you mean to me.

Not trying to change anyone.  Wouldn't do it on a gender perception, won't do it on belief systems either.  Both are deeply personal realities.

Please, be well... I did not intend to intrude.  That brings the tears again.  Not your fault.

SJ

Morpheus: This is your last chance. After this, there is no turning back. You take the red pill - the story ends, you wake up in your bed and believe whatever you want to believe. You take the little blue pills - you stay in Wonderland and I show you how deep the rabbit-hole goes

Sh'e took the little blue ones.
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RobinGee

The brain studies have always showed transsexuals to have brains in between male and female.
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ativan

Quote from: Satinjoy on August 15, 2014, 11:48:59 AM
Good heavens I sure didn't mean to trigger that.
It wasn't a trigger, it was more of an explanation of where those feelings come from.
I'm more worried that it may have triggered some into thinking the wrong thing.
It's a difficult topic for me and one that I feel I fail to explain sufficiently.
Ativan
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Shantel

None of any of this has ever held any sway over me whatsoever. I'm probably not trans according to anyone's official definition, I've never waited around to see if I met the approved criteria or was covered by any insurance, nor have I gone through anyone's prescribed hoops to find out. I know who and what I am, twenty years ago I pulled out all the stops on my own and became fully me and am happy with my decision. Back then the rules and gatekeepers appeared to be nothing more than a roadblock to my serenity so I bulldozed my way right past them and left those who don't know their own mind and hearts to have their lives sorted out by those types and I agree that most need to be sorted out before moving ahead from what I've seen, so there is a valid need for all that mumbo-jumbo in spite of what some of us feel about the process.
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helen2010

Quote from: Ativan Prescribed on August 16, 2014, 10:20:31 AM
It wasn't a trigger, it was more of an explanation of where those feelings come from.
I'm more worried that it may have triggered some into thinking the wrong thing.
It's a difficult topic for me and one that I feel I fail to explain sufficiently.
Ativan
Ativan

It is a difficult and a very personal topic.  I think that your explanation was laudatory, quite frankly it was viscerally honest and very powerful.  I won't add my perspective as my spirituality (rather than religious belief) and beliefs are a lot like my gender, they are my truth and evangelism seems inappropriate.

Safe travels

Aisla
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helen2010

Quote from: Shantel on August 16, 2014, 11:15:45 AM
None of any of this has ever held any sway over me whatsoever. I'm probably not trans according to anyone's official definition, I've never waited around to see if I met the approved criteria or was covered by any insurance, nor have I gone through anyone's prescribed hoops to find out. I know who and what I am, twenty years ago I pulled out all the stops on my own and became fully me and am happy with my decision. Back then the rules and gatekeepers appeared to be nothing more than a roadblock to my serenity so I bulldozed my way right past them and left those who don't know their own mind and hearts to have their lives sorted out by those types and I agree that most need to be sorted out before moving ahead from what I've seen, so there is a valid need for all that mumbo-jumbo in spite of what some of us feel about the process.

Shan

Returning to the OP,  I was dissuaded by those same roadblocks and the (mis) understandings of trans* which we both faced 20 years ago.  I didn't understand that only we can determine our identity and our truth, neither did I contemplate that I could be non binary.  I didn't have your clarity or your courage.  I sought solace in distraction and denial, when I could, and arguably should, have sought my truth.

However I don't regret this, as this was my decision and this has led me to where I am today.  It is the right place for me at this point in time.  Doubtless my journey will continue and I believe that my pursuit of authenticity will lead me to even better places.

I am now less concerned with finding a single explanation for my truth - scientific explanations appeal,  social theory appears to have some relevance and affect/development theory resonates.  I have concluded that it doesn't matter, I should just choose a paradigm that works for me.   More importantly I intend to follow your example and  'knowing my mind and my heart' move forward without unnecessary deference to the gate keepers who have been such a key part of my earlier journey.

Safe travels

Aisla
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Illuminess

I have no medical proof, but I'm fairly certain I'm XXY. I know there's usually no connection between that and being trans, but I'm pretty sure it has influenced it. I think if I also didn't have Asperger's I probably would have been more expressive growing up. Instead, my interests and behavior didn't really lean one way or the other. I always preferred the company of girls over boys growing up, but I wasn't compelled to play with dolls. I was simply content in their presence. Boys always played rough and were mean, and that made me uncomfortable. My best friend for years was a tomboyish girl, and we just ran around imagining all sorts of weird things, going on adventures. The older I got, the more withdrawn I was, and wrote lots of poetry. Masculinity was never me, but I wasn't into all the girly stuff, either. I never once felt like a boy, but I did feel like a girl out of place. When you don't fit on one end of the spectrum or the other, according to social standards, the only thing that seems possible is to just keep going as you are. But then years later it starts to catch up with you. If it's not dealt with it doesn't go away, and whoever denies you treatment should have their license revoked for malpractice.
△ ☾ Rıνεя Aяıп Lαυяıε ☽ △

"Despair holds a sweetness that only an artist's tongue can taste."Illuminess
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Satinjoy

Quote from: Aisla on August 16, 2014, 11:39:23 AM
Ativan

It is a difficult and a very personal topic.  I think that your explanation was laudatory, quite frankly it was viscerally honest and very powerful.  I won't add my perspective as my spirituality (rather than religious belief) and beliefs are a lot like my gender, they are my truth and evangelism seems inappropriate.

Safe travels

Aisla

Agreed, wholeheartedly, and it has changed my perspective on things...

I will keep the religious comments to the Christianity forum, and start learning about the political issues I have deliberately blinded myself to.

I also overreacted, will deal with that on another thread.

To the point of Paige, the nerve endings are perception, and it would be interesting to see how we experience our bodies in that way....

Morpheus: This is your last chance. After this, there is no turning back. You take the red pill - the story ends, you wake up in your bed and believe whatever you want to believe. You take the little blue pills - you stay in Wonderland and I show you how deep the rabbit-hole goes

Sh'e took the little blue ones.
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Satinjoy

To the point of the OP, it comes down as far as I can tell to the individual endos and shrinks and their understanding of us and our needs, and I  think that may vary considerably.  I don't trust either insurance or government to do any of that with an eye to our needs.  Not at all.  But I think many gender therapists see the pain and genuinely want to help, regardless of the systems in play, yet covering their butts with the legal side of it.

Blessings
Morpheus: This is your last chance. After this, there is no turning back. You take the red pill - the story ends, you wake up in your bed and believe whatever you want to believe. You take the little blue pills - you stay in Wonderland and I show you how deep the rabbit-hole goes

Sh'e took the little blue ones.
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