Childhood Trauma Survivor Misdiagnosed as Transsexual with Gender Dysphoria

[familyfarm]

I am hoping I would be posting correctly here as there seems to be different areas for ftm and mtf and I am the mother of a young adult whom transitioned when he (ftm) was around 12. My son has been very open about a lot of some of these same topics with us from the time he asked to talk to us. The difference between gender dysphoria and other possible ptsd related diagnoses' are pretty distinct; even from talking to my son. He stated a shame for his body at an early age, a feeling of being male and even of the preference in gender he is attracted to stemming first from feeling possibly lesbian to being assured he was/is transgender. DID should be obvious to any decently trained psychiatrist as the personalities differ rather then one personality and not all altars are present at once. If even more then one altar or personality presents in the course of a session, this is obviously not a case of gender dysphoria. Also, I can only imagine from college studies we did on DID personality disorder, that this is most definitely largely caused by trauma. DID has been heavily studied and diagnosed from the 60's on up and in some landmark and famous cases. We learned about it extensively in just the second year of college.

My husband and I went through everything with my son for counselors, etc over the years and the one main theme I see as harming the transgender/transsexual community is that it is often tagged as being a repercussion of trauma. It also gives a more confusing viewpoint for cis people targeting the trans community as it should be seen in a medical and biological possibility.

My son was considered 'tomboy' back in the early 90's for his extreme dislike of wearing female clothing. At the age of 7, we moved into a new neighborhood. After a couple months of being there, there came a day when he didn't come home for dinner. It was a small neighborhood. I asked about my son by his female birth name and no one knew anything. At the last road, there was a group of boys playing and they said, "Is he related to Michael? Michael just moved in on your street." We later found out that he had gone out in his baseball cap (had long hair at the time) and introduced himself as Michael. He would tell parents of the boys he befriended that his parents couldn't afford good clothes so would get cast-offs from these same families. He would hide them under his bed and sneak out in them as I was pretty tough on him wearing nice clothes (not dresses but probably considered more girly and cute-he was 7). This had been an ongoing fight from the time he could choose what he likes and even one incident I can remember; he was very young-maybe 5, but not certain of the age, when he actually tried ripping up a dress before a funeral for my mother. He became pretty aggressive and I had to learn how to restrain him after 'temper tantrums' only when we were forcing the issue of clothing and things we purchased for Christmas, etc. We didn't do well for him and had no idea to look for anything other then anger issues. There were literally no past traumas nor abuse. However when he started counselors and even after for his transitioning medically, they were stuck on using past trauma to 'debunk his feeling transgender'. I went through more counselors then I can count the first two years and in two states for putting my son through hell this way and making him just more frustrated and angry. We did find some help through PP and only through them with full understanding. However, even my son will say there was nothing that made him angry nor traumatized. He just didn't feel like the person he saw in the mirror his entire life.

As parents, we are attacked for everything under the sun with him being transgender and it's cause. One person reacted to us supporting his surgery as being the cause of his wanting to destroy his body and brought up a ridiculously heated accusation about circumcision. Seemed the little group was just snowballing into this one since my son is almost 21 getting the surgery anyhow. Other times, the past trauma was connected as we apparently weren't digging deep enough and helping him be a different gender to the point of making his past worse when....there is no past; it's just assumed. These were the ones whom would at least try to give it a chance at understanding. It has hurt his chances and even an understanding of our support. It's difficult to even get through  to some counselors that my son was a well adjusted young man whom  was transitioning. He would talk to them about his feelings and guilt at being so different but at the same time, he was very firm that this was whom he was. They labored this for over a year trying to find something that caused this while he just wanted to start his t-shots and plans for surgery. I find linking trauma and other causes to gender dysphoria is extremely dangerous to the community and possible understanding of the biological chemicals that can be a contributing factor. I am a survivor of trauma due to molestation and later rape and abuse by an alcoholic husband before I was even 21. I have known many of those falling in that category (most of us agree that the generation of our parents [60's and 70's] produced probably the most messed up parents in history as the numbers for molestation and abuse in my age group that are coming out is staggering). I can't honestly see any link in this cause and affect theory for gender dysphoria on a level that would show this being the primary cause in average cases when compared to how many other forms of PTSD result from the same types of trauma. DID and other PTSD; absolutely. I suffer it as well in different ways. I think it can even be harmful in this correlation as the person being treated can be labeled with prejudice before the text book is even opened past page 1.

Worse, my son tried to commit suicide at the age of 18, was kept in the hospital then sent to a psych lock-up called LifeStream. They tried to blame past trauma on his thinking he is transgender and his feeling this way to his suicide attempt. Hmmm. We, and our son, were very clear that his suicide attempt was a result of living in a hick place with ignorant bullies that finally pushed him to that point after 3 years of it from family and friends until we could move out of there. And the fact that he felt he was a burden to his family due to the ignorance out there making him feel like he was called in vulgar and biblical terms. We had to drive out three hours to get to an advocate who would get him out of lock-up at this horrible place where they shoved him in a corner and kept using the wrong pronouns and mis gendering him trying to keep him indefinitely for evaluation and treatment.

Obviously, a lot more needs to be researched but it seems to be stunted with preconceived notions and confusions or labels and the need to group cases together. I can't contribute as to how one could feel the difference in DID or transgender but can say transgender individuals typically have a strong feeling consistently at their body and the skin they are in. I think the possibility of not having an awareness missing of altar personalities can be the only confusion which should be easily recognized when being confronted with stress or hypnosis and regression in counseling and therapy. If this isn't the first suggestion of a psychiatrist should a person seem to have doubts as to what they can be going through, then it's time to seek another professional.

Thanks tons for sharing your story; it's very important to understand the wide spectrum and complexity behind personality disorders, PTSD and and gender dysphoria.

[Virginia]

@FamilyFarm
I am so very sorry to hear of the way the medical system treated you and your son. Your pain is clear in your post and resonates strongly with the misdiagnosis of my DID as transgender gender dysphoria.

A few things I would like to clarify:

DID should be obvious to any decently trained psychiatrist as the personalities differ rather then one personality and not all altars are present at once.

If even more then one altar or personality presents in the course of a session, this is obviously not a case of gender dysphoria.

DID is EXTREMELY difficult to diagnose.
The differences between alters are typically very subtle. My wife of 25 years can tell which of my alters is fronting, but even she admits to the rest of the world the differences are barely noticeable or simply fly under the radar as personality quirks.

DID is often called a disorder of secrecy because the victims life depended on hiding what they were doing from their perpetrator.  Masking itself as a variety of other mental conditions, the average person is in the mental car system 10 years before they are correctly diagnosed with the disorder

the one main theme I see as harming the transgender/transsexual community is that it is often tagged as being a repercussion of trauma.

The difference between gender dysphoria and other possible ptsd related diagnoses' are pretty distinct

Misdiagnosis hurts all patients, not just the transgender. That the differences between Gender Dysphoria and PTSD related disorders resulting from childhood sexual abuse are NOT distinct is the underlying cause of misdiagnosis. Abuse does not cause ->-bleeped-<-. Given the high prevalence of childhood sexual abuse/trauma and the similarity of symptoms of ->-bleeped-<- to those of trauma, it is the likely diagnosis for someone with transgender symptoms. It can take years of therapy to discern the difference, particularly for a transgender person child who experienced childhood sexual abuse.

I think the possibility of not having an awareness missing of altar personalities can be the only confusion which should be easily recognized when being confronted with stress or hypnosis and regression in counseling and therapy. If this isn't the first suggestion of a psychiatrist should a person seem to have doubts as to what they can be going through, then it's time to seek another professional.

EMD, hypnosis and regression therapy are not used in the treatment of patients with DID. They are EXTREMELY dangerous because of the high risk of mental breakdown. I would run, not walk, from any psychologist whose first suggestion was any of these treatment options for DID.

[Lucca]

So how long should someone with transgender symptoms spend getting checked for other conditions before transitioning? I'm confused again, because you seem to be suggesting that because transgender-like conditions are apparently more common than true ->-bleeped-<-, that anyone with transgender symptoms should spend a lot of time getting "checked" first. And if it's so hard to tell the difference, how am I supposed to know what it is I have?

[Virginia]

At the risk of going down an earlier rabbit hole:

So how long should someone with transgender symptoms spend getting checked for other conditions before transitioning? I'm confused again, because you seem to be suggesting that because transgender-like conditions are apparently more common than true ->-bleeped-<-, that anyone with transgender symptoms should spend a lot of time getting "checked" first. And if it's so hard to tell the difference, how am I supposed to know what it is I have?

I'm not suggesting that  transgender-like conditions are more common than true ->-bleeped-<-, I am saying that they ARE more common.

How long a person gets checked for other conditions before transitioning is between the person and their doctor.

There aren't any simple answers and no one can do this for you, Lucca. Each person has to do the hard work it takes to come to "know" for themself. As it is so hard to tell the difference, therapy is vital to help a person reach a point of clarity about why they feel the way they do. There are no guarantees. The forum is full of stories of people who detransitioned because they discovered it was not right for them and people who spent the best part of a lifetime trying to decide if transitioning was right for them.

[Lucca]

But the regret rate for transition is so low, I don't see how there can be such a big problem with how transgender symptoms are treated. Plus, I haven't seen any of this corroborated by any legit medical sources that discuss treatment options for transgender symptoms. There are plenty of unscientific conversion therapy clinics who might agree, quoting Bible verses instead of real scientific evidence. With all due respect, forgive me if I'm skeptical.

[Virginia]

Regardless of regret rate (And there are statistics as high as 33%), it's YOUR life at stake.

(EDIT: Insert note)
Note: statistic relates to the outcome of THERAPY not the outcome of actual transition

I am talking about extreme psychological disorder. Conversion therapies are no more effective for them than ->-bleeped-<-. You won't find any of this corroborated by any legit medical sources that discuss treatment options for symptoms of ->-bleeped-<- because NONE Of This Applies to ->-bleeped-<-.

There is a tremendous amount of good information in this thread. It might be helpful for you to print it out so you can discuss your concerns in therapy.

[Lucca]

Where are you seeing a regret rate of 33%?

And I have read the thread, but I don't see much in the way of actual scientific evidence or research to support your conclusions, and they in go in direct opposition to everything I've read about successful treatment for transgender symptoms. You keep backing out by saying "none of this applies to true ->-bleeped-<-." Well, yes, but if your argument is that it's difficult to determine if someone has true ->-bleeped-<- or transgender-like symptoms, then that doesn't really mean anything.

[Michelle_P]

Regarding these regret rates...

I am aware of only one source that consistently claims a persistent regret rate of more than a few percent, and as that source both has an agenda and does not substantiate the reported numbers I would have to consider them to be an unreliable actor.

There are reliable statistical studies on transition regret, both transient and persistent.

http://www.amsa.org/wp-content/uploads/2015/04/CareOfThePatientUndergoingSRS.pdf

With any irreversible medical procedure there is a risk of patient dissatisfaction, and primary care providers are often concerned that their transgender patients will experience regret following SRS. To address this concern it is helpful to understand (a) the incidence and causes of post-surgical regret, and (b) protective measures in place to help prevent regret following SRS.

Temporary concerns are relatively common after any surgery, and (in both the transsexual and non- transsexual literature) typically relate to post-operative pain, surgical complications, discrepancy between hoped-for results and actual results, and initial difficulty adjusting to the impact of surgery on immediate relationships.2 Dissatisfaction, disappointment, doubt, or other psychological difficulties that represent normal adjustment and resolve (spontaneously or with psychotherapeutic assistance) in the first year after surgery are distinguished from a persistent wish that surgery had not been pursued.

Persistent regret is more rare following surgery, and may (for reversible surgeries) be accompanied by a request for surgical reversal. In studies of non-transsexual individuals who reported regret following a variety of surgical procedures (including surgical sterilization,15-19 mastectomy,20-25 breast reconstruction,23,26 breast augmentation,27-29 oophorectomy,30 orchiectomy,31 limb salvage surgery,32 gastric banding,33 and colpocleisis34), the regret rate ranged from <1% to 23%. The reported reasons for regret included adverse physical effects of surgery, loss of physical functioning, poor aesthetic result, failure to achieve desired effect, lack of support available before and after surgery, change in intimate relationship, psychological issues not recognized prior to surgery, and incongruence between patient preferences regarding decision involvement and their actual level of involvement.

Persistent regret among post-operative transsexuals has been studied since the early 1960s. The most comprehensive meta-review done to date analyzed 74 follow-up studies and 8 reviews of outcome studies published between 1961 and 1991 (1000-1600 MTF and 400-550 FTM patients).3 The authors concluded that in this 30 year period, <1% of female-to-males (FTMs) and 1-1.5% of male-to-females (MTFs) experienced persistent regret following SRS. Studies published since 1991 have reported a decrease in the incidence of regret for both MTFs and FTMs that is likely due to improved quality of psychological and surgical care for individuals undergoing sex reassignment.

Numerous studies have explored clinical practices that may help in the prevention of regret following SRS, and negative prognostic factors. There are three key factors in persistent regret following SRS: (a) incorrect diagnosis of gender dysphoria or of co-existing psychopathology, (b) poor quality of surgical intervention, and (c) lack of ability to live in the desired gender role.2,5,40 The latter issue is influenced by numerous psychosocial issues, including lack of support by loved ones, psychological dysfunction, fluctuating gender identity, and insufficient professional support during treatment.35,37,40 None are considered absolute contraindications for SRS, but all are considered risk factors that warrant careful clinical attention. The HBIGDA Standards of Care require "real life experience" (RLE) in the desired gender role as part of the pre-surgical evaluative process prior to genital surgery or gonadal removal. The RLE provides an opportunity to evaluate the impact of transition on the patient's support network (loved ones, friends, etc.), and the impact of the stresses of transition on the patient's psychological resilience.

Inaccurate diagnosis of gender dysphoria or co-existing psychopathology and poor quality of the surgical intervention relate to clinical competence for mental health professionals and surgeons involved in transsexual care. The HBIGDA Standards of Care outline competency requirements for clinicians involved in SRS, and HBIGDA also provides opportunities for scientific interchange among professionals through its biennial conferences, publications, and email discussion lists. The Transgender Health Program (Appendix A) coordinates training for surgical assessors who have the professional credentials required by HBIGDA and the BC Medical Services Plan.

As discussed above, the HBIGDA Standards of Care state that pre-operative counselling is at the discretion of the mental health professional(s) conducting the assessment of surgery eligibility and readiness. While psychotherapy is not an absolute requirement for SRS, supportive professional and peer counselling can be helpful with preparation and adjustment, and should be accessible to all patients before and after surgery. The primary care provider can assist by discussing patient awareness of resources and, where needed, facilitating referrals to trans-experienced professionals.

A combination of reasonable psychotherapy care, real life experience, and a decent surgeon seems to be the best way to avoid perisistent regret over transition. 

[SeptagonScars]

I don't remember if I've posted in this thread before or not, but considering I happen to be a person who regrets a gender transition surgery (ftm mastectomy) perhaps I have an opinion on this discussion in general. Or at least, I have my personal story and conclusions of it.

For me it was because of underlying psychological issues that I was not aware of before the op. Or rather, not fully aware of what they actually meant, but I was aware of their existence. I started being vaguely aware of the impact of my decision to have surgery already one month before my op though. But I was so certain that I actually wanted the surgery and that my struggle was only because of normal nervousness of getting invasive surgery for the first time ever, as well as a reaction from my nicotine withdrawal from me quitting smoking.

But in retrospect that was not normal surgery woes or just withdrawal woes, but a full on rampant panic that kept going 24/7 for 5 weeks. My gut feeling tried to scream sense to me, but I didn't listen to it. I recognised that feeling for what it was because then 4 years later the same thing happened with my mind when I was planning to get bottom surgery, but then I finally learned my lesson, listened to my body and cancelled that planned op before it could take place.

By the time I got my mastectomy I had been living "RLE" and binding my chest, and been in gender therapy, for 5 years.

After the op I had trouble adjusting to the result and I was in some sort of shock about it, but I couldn't understand why. I reasoned back then that I wished I had chosen a different method for my mastectomy, cause I was insecure about my scars. But I was very uncomfortable showing my chest to anyone, even after it had healed up. The result in and of itself as good, so it wasn't that that bothered me, but I was still in emotional distress about it.

In retrospect I now get that I was probably having a huge internal fight with myself that I simply "should" have been satisfied and beat myself up for feeling what actually was regret. About a year after the op I started getting used to it and was less bothered, even found some things I liked about it, but I was still very uncomfortable with being flat-chested. It felt unnatural and alien to me. That feeling never went away. I very much deflected and ignored that I did miss having breasts.

It's now been 4 years since the op when I finally faced my fears and stopped running from my true feelings. They hit me hard. At first I made a last desperate attempt to reject my feelings, but then let them come to me. Eventually feelings of a heavy sadness, regret, feeling broken and a huge disconnect to my body revealed themselves to me. Now I know getting a mastectomy was a big mistake for me. It essentially created a gender dysphoria I didn't have previously, but thought I did, and that caused a very confusing distress in my mind.

From my own perspective of my own situation in regards to gender reassignment surgery regret:
- The gender clinic I initially went to was iffy but ultimately it was not their responsibility to make me tell them the truth that I refused to tell them; that was on me.
- The second gender clinic I went to (for second opinion, kinda) only did all they could to help me with the information they had about my case; the therapists were great there.
- The surgeon who did my op was also great and did a good job, he offered me a revision that I didn't take, I had no complications, I healed well, the result was objectively good. He's largely unknown and was new to ftm mastectomies at the time which makes his performance even more amazing to me; so I have zero reasons to blame him.
- There was nothing no one could have done to prevent me from getting the surgery that I then regretted, I was determined to get it, so to the point I was willing to lie for it.
- I have no one to blame but myself.
- Forgiving myself for having effed up my body is a lot harder than throwing blame on others, but it is the mature and wise thing to do, and I'm trying to.
- It hurts but literally the only actually good things I can do from here on is to be honest and stop with the lying, to look into what I can do to reduce my emotional pain of regret and the disconnect I have to my body that arose from having had that surgery (as in look into reconstructive breast augmentation surgery), get therapy on my underlying issues, and for once just listen to my own body and mind. Move forward, and try not to drown in my grief and throwing blame around.

My opinions on this topic in general:
Regret happens and it cannot be 100% prevented. And sometimes it's not the docs fault even though they obviously have some responsibility and ofc in some cases malpractice happens. But I don't think they have full responsibility. If they're honest and clear about what it all entails and leave the decision up to the patients, the patient also has a part of that responsibility. Care and support should be given to those who experience regret, especially therapeutic help but ofc also surgical help if necessary and/or requested by the patient.

Also, good link you shared, Michelle_P

[Lucca]

Thanks for your story. Yes, regret certainly does happen, but I'm lead to believe that it's both uncommon, and even further minimized if the individual seeking treatment is honest about their feelings. I'm just confused in regards to what Virginia is saying, because it goes completely against all of my own research on the subject, which suggests that treating people who have "transgender symptoms" with transition has a very high success rate. Virginia keeps saying that it's more likely that people with transgender symptoms aren't transgender and therefore trauma-related disorders should be the first assumed cause, but when I push for more details, I'm just told that none of this applies to transgender people, so I don't need to worry about it . I don't want to ruffle any feathers this time, I just can't figure out what he's talking about.

[Michelle_P]

In my therapy sessions I decided when starting that I had to be brutally honest, that obfuscation would just slow or stall my healing process.

When I read about folks who are afraid to disclose their feelings or thoughts within therapy, I worry about their results or lack of progress. While therapists are trained to spot avoidance and misdirection, sometimes patients are awfully good at it. That may make the patient less uncomfortable but it does them no good.

There is some responsibility on the patient to be honest and as open as possible with the therapist, just as the therapist must fully evaluate the patient.

Psychotherapy is a two way street.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[SeptagonScars]

Thanks for your story. Yes, regret certainly does happen, but I'm lead to believe that it's both uncommon, and even further minimized if the individual seeking treatment is honest about their feelings. I'm just confused in regards to what Virginia is saying, because it goes completely against all of my own research on the subject, which suggests that treating people who have "transgender symptoms" with transition has a very high success rate. Virginia keeps saying that it's more likely that people with transgender symptoms aren't transgender and therefore trauma-related disorders should be the first assumed cause, but when I push for more details, I'm just told that none of this applies to transgender people, so I don't need to worry about it . I don't want to ruffle any feathers this time, I just can't figure out what he's talking about.

I feel inclined to disagree with Virginia on that point. According to the sources I've found, I agree with you that it's very rare that regret happens and the vast majority of people who transition end up satisfied, or at least, at a better place mentally than they were prior to transition. So yes, I agree it has a very high success rate.

I know it's not a very all encompassing source at all, but I looked at the regret statistics of that are stated on the website of the gender clinic I'm going to (the largest one in my tiny country of only 9 million people) which says that around 1000 people have transitioned via the Swedish system and applied for legal gender marker change, while only 15 of them have applied to get their gender marker changed back to bio gender. And that's for the past 46 years since transitioning became possible here in 1972. Ofc people have detransitioned earlier in transition than to the point of gender marker change, so that's why nose numbers are not all that all-encompassing, but I think they may give a very rough estimation that regret is very rare if I'll be the 16th person ever in Swedish history to change gender marker back again.

Well, I think that largely transgender health care is going well, and I'd worry that including more in depth therapy to rule out other issues could make it worse for that majority of those who seek such care who are trans and just want to get on with transition and their lives.

I think if anything, it would be good to put some pressure on the (hopefully few) docs who don't do their jobs right and mistreat patients seeking trans care out of negligence. But, I think that's a very reasonable wish to have on health care in general and isn't just applicable to trans health care. And maybe have more research be put into it so that trans health care can be improved both for those who are trans and those who think they are but turn out not to be. I just mean that if improvements are to be made, I don't think one camp should have to suffer for the sake of improving care for the other camp.

I haven't read through the entire thread, but I saw some of VA's posts about that supposedly a thid of all transitioners regret it, without showing sources. You have every right to ask for sources before believing in something, so I get that's a bit frustrating. It might be so that very many of those who do regret it do so because of trauma-related issues, but that would say nothing about regret rates in general.

In my therapy sessions I decided when starting that I had to be brutally honest, that obfuscation would just slow or stall my healing process.

When I read about folks who are afraid to disclose their feelings or thoughts within therapy, I worry about their results or lack of progress. While therapists are trained to spot avoidance and misdirection, sometimes patients are awfully good at it. That may make the patient less uncomfortable but it does them no good.

There is some responsibility on the patient to be honest and as open as possible with the therapist, just as the therapist must fully evaluate the patient.

Psychotherapy is a two way street.

I agree with you on that point, but I didn't in the past. I thought I knew myself better than they did and had huge trust issues towards the entire health care system. Yeah I got good at lying but it did me no good. Well, except from that it taught me a lot about how not to behave in therapy and exactly why it was bad and what consequences it could lead to.

Now when I speak to therapists I tell them the truth as much as I can, and when I struggle with that I say "I'm not comfortable sharing this right now" as well as informing them of my trust issues.

I'm just adding this short reply to you here to say I was an idiot to behave like that, but I learned and understand that now, and have changed. So it took me a long time and lots of unnecessary suffering, but now I get it Pain is a very effective lesson, sometimes.

[Virginia]

Lucca, Virginia is offering the best possible explanation one can offer from the position of having DID. The transgender diagnosis was forced incorrectly by the therapist and it became a matter of digging out the truth. Virginia is here to watch for others who might fall into this trap. It has happened to another member of the site who was able to receive surgery only to discover the mistaken diagnosis. Remember that the opening post isn't so much about being transgender but is about having DID and being misdiagnosed with transsexualism.

All I wanted was an explanation of what differentiates DID from ->-bleeped-<-, and how a psychiatrist would distinguish one from the other in a diagnosis. I initially was not given such a thing, was then derided for asking for it, and am now being derided for having received it. Great. I've learned nothing except to avoid the topic at all costs.

If you have a skilled therapist, you state your transgender and you exhibit the symptoms of being transgender, the therapist will have few options other than to diagnosis you as transgender. ->-bleeped-<- is a self diagnosed condition so the therapist's purpose is to verify what your saying and determine that there are no other conditions that would interfere with your judgement. The therapist isn't there to diagnosis you though they might make suggestions for you to consider.

DID is another matter because often people who suffer from it aren't aware that they have it. They have gaps in their memory much like you do when you sleep or they might remember the actions of their alter as a dream. The reason they don't realize this is abnormal is because it's all they have ever known so they are unaware of what everybody else experiences. There is an element of self denial when somebody describes an action they took that they lack the memory of.

A good therapist is unlikely to diagnosis you as DID unless a symptom indicates the possibility. This is a relatively rare condition and even when a therapist suspects it, they will have to do a good deal more digging for supporting evidence. The therapist is looking for anything that might affect your judgement and bipolar or schizophrenia are more likely possibilities than DID.

If you should ever disagree with a diagnosis you receive from your therapist, demand the reasons for the diagnosis. If you feel the therapist is wrong, you have the option of discussing it here or seeing another therapist for a second opinion. If a therapist isn't a good fit, there is no reason why you should stay with them.

Also remember that I am watching this thread and the inability to answer a question isn't a reason to be upset. Try waiting for somebody else to answer the question or try to rephrase the question. Sometimes there isn't an answer to a question so forcing the issue isn't going to provide an answer.   

[Lucca]

I'll just put out here that I like my current therapist, I think she's the tenth one I've seen in my life, and the only one who's actually helped me significantly. She's very oriented towards giving me the agency to make my own decisions about my own life, while my past ones usually weren't. They always wanted to form their own inferences about why I was the way I was and didn't want to let go of them. That does include a therapist who was too pushy about me transitioning, and I found it very off-putting.

Hence, I'm a bit touchy at the idea that therapists should presume I have trauma before anything else and spend, what, ten years figuring out if I have DID? I'm still unclear on that. I mean, that story that familyfarm told is an example of how prevalent the "this is caused by trauma and transition needs to be prevented at all costs" mindset can be. I'm not going to put up with going through that.

EDIT: Ok, is there some purpose to quoting a moderator's response to me with no other content? I remember what it said. I didn't realize that calmly asking questions was against the rules.

[Sephirah]

EDIT: Ok, is there some purpose to quoting a moderator's response to me with no other content? I remember what it said. I didn't realize that calmly asking questions was against the rules.

It isn't.

[Devlyn]

EDIT: Ok, is there some purpose to quoting a moderator's response to me with no other content? I remember what it said. I didn't realize that calmly asking questions was against the rules.

It isn't.

Well, I  sure got in plenty of trouble doing it! 

[SoupSarah]

Myth: Most people regret transitioning / surgery
This is untrue. The regret rate for sexual reassignment surgery ranges from about 0-2% as reported by most recent studies on the subject. (For comparison's sake, the regret rate after cosmetic surgery hovers at around 65% in the UK, but it has not received anywhere near the same level of public moral concern.)
https://www.researchgate.net/publication/262734734_An_Analysis_of_All_Applications_for_Sex_Reassignment_Surgery_in_Sweden_1960-2010_Prevalence_Incidence_and_Regrets
http://www.amsa.org/wp-content/uploads/2015/04/CareOfThePatientUndergoingSRS.pdf
Both papers site a 1-2% regret rate.

I think this shows that "on the whole" the various systems in the world work to weed out the people that this is  not appropriate for. Therefore I believe, that the 33% rate quoted  is people who start on the road to transistion and then before GRS decide not to continue as they realise it is not the "correct" path for them. That would explain why the regret rate is so low. So it is a little like comparing apples and pairs with the statistics quoted by everyone?

@septagonscars - You write as a beautiful and intelligent human being. You made choices in your life that, for you at the time, were right. They now turn out to be not ideal but I really think you are being overly tough on yourself and beating yourself up a little too much (a common trait with dissociatives BTW). Try not to dwell on the past too much and celebrate the amazing person you are now and your future. Very few humans get to live a life like you have.(and being multiple is amazing and beyond the scope of singles understanding). xx

@Familyfarm - You sound an amazing parent. I wish you were my mother!

Take care
Sarah x

[Virginia]

I believe, that the 33% rate quoted  is people who start on the road to transistion and then before GRS decide not to continue as they realise it is not the "correct" path for them.

Thank you for clarifying, Soupsarah. That is how the 33% rate was explained to me by my psychologist. It relates to the outcome of THERAPY not the outcome of transition; the reason I quoted it in my reply above.

[Lucca]

Ok, that makes more sense then. I still don't see that anyone's given a source. In which case, it's fine for anyone who's received the information from a source they consider reliable to believe it, but I'm nuetral about it until I've seen evidence. I'm not sure why it's controversial that that's what I'd expect.

I'm all for people receiving the help they need, and not being pushed to transition if they don't want it. What I'm not for is the mental health professional community deciding that there's one condition I "probably" have before they've considered my full input, or putting roadblocks in my way to prevent me from transitioning when I'm perfectly capable of making my own decisions and have already spent many years figuring myself out. I'm not for inaccurate statistics or drawing unwarranted conclusions from unrelated sets of statistics, either. If you aren't for any of those things, then there isn't a problem.

I'm just trying to have a civil conversation on a topic that you ultimately brought up when you created this thread, Virginia. I don't know what I did to offend you so much that you quoted the moderator's post back to me. I think I've kept a level head this time.

[Virginia]

@Lucca
Thank you for noting I am a man and for not using genderless pronouns when referring to me.

What I'm not for is the mental health professional community deciding that there's one condition I "probably" have

I'm not for inaccurate statistics or drawing unwarranted conclusions from unrelated sets of statistics, either.

The point of my entire post is to make people aware that "the mental health professional community deciding that there's one condition I 'probably' have" and  "inaccurate statistics or drawing unwarranted conclusions from unrelated sets of statistics" LED to the misdiagnosis of my Dissociative Identity Disorder as transgender Gender Dysphoria.