I accidentally rediscovered something I remember hearing a long time ago. I decided to work on my posture and carriage, to give my femininity better expression, and found some instructional material on the web. When I started putting it into practice, my mood, self-esteem, etc., transformed instantly. This was the body directing the mind, something many people don't seem to be aware of.
I've been practicing when I go to the mall to walk for exercise. I get between 2 & 3 miles each day, and it gives me lots of practice. It feels just wonderful! Who knew that posture could be so important.
Something else has been happening, too. I may have mentioned somewhere, recently, that I was connecting more with feminine imagery; I think this is the real me, emerging after a very long sleep. Well, in just the last few days, I find myself reading the expressions of women and seeing new things. To what extent is it projection? I don't know. But it's a definite change. When I thought I was male, I didn't fit in anywhere -- not with men, certainly, and I wasn't included with women. Now, however, there's some kind of connection; women are less objectified, more human, more complex, more genuine, less scary.
While advertising photos are highly stylized, they are nevertheless designed to express something real; and I find myself looking at some of these pictures and thinking, "I get it. I understand that emotion." It's just wonderful, and amazing, and I hope it never ends.
