If It's Not Just "Being Born in the Wrong Body . . ."

[Arch]

. . . then what is it, for you? I've heard a lot of people say that the "born in the wrong body" paradigm distresses them or doesn't work for them or is incomplete or inaccurate. So I'm curious to hear how other people look at and describe their situations.

[MelissaAnn]

Boy, that's a good question.... All I know is I should have born a girl . I know that's not what you are asking but ever sense I can remember All I wanted to do was play with girl toys, dress in girl cloths, play girl games. This did not sit well with my dad and he did every thing he could to get me to repress these feelings(I wont go into that right now). Which I did...! I look forward to seeing some other's opinions on this thread.My the angles always be looking down on you.

Hugs,

Melissa Ann

[Natalie]

I was born a girl with a medical condition that required surgical and hormonal intervention to correct my birth defects. Nothing more.

[MelissaAnn]

Natalie
I like your response, May I use it in the future?

Hugs,

Melissa Ann

[Mariah]

I always have viewed it as being assigned the wrong gender considering the number of surgeries that were done in the gentile area. Even after learning what the chromosomes were I still view it that way even though the route they went with does match the chromosomes. It hasn't changed my feelings regarding this. How I feel and think is more important than those chromosomes. I suppose it comes from the point that when someone is born they assign based on what they see without taking into account other things.
Mariahed

. . . then what is it, for you? I've heard a lot of people say that the "born in the wrong body" paradigm distresses them or doesn't work for them or is incomplete or inaccurate. So I'm curious to hear how other people look at and describe their situations.

[Cindy]

There is a lot of evidence, good hard science, that gender is controlled by a number of genes, mutations in them, including the androgen receptor genes are responsible for gender ID.

Have to remember as well that there are over 300 natal females who have given birth who are XY. The numbers are small because most people are not karyotyped routinely.

So I would go with gender misassigned at birth since it was based on external physical gender characteristics.

[ImagineKate]

I was born a girl with a medical condition that required surgical and hormonal intervention to correct my birth defects. Nothing more.

This is how I see it.

[Jaded Jade]

I dislike the "X in a Y body" way of describing it, because it fails to explain to cis-folks the GD side of it.  Short of whatever interventions the individual needs, which are usually some form of HRT and surgery, the GD cannot be beaten.

It is a demon worse than death.  And will kill you, grinding you away like a millstone till there is nothing left.

I think that if more cis-folks really understood that, many more of them would be come to understand and support trans folks.  Hopefully with some of the more genuine media portrals coming from Amazon and such understanding will increase.

"X in a Y body" just seems unrelatable, and fails to convey the true deapth and darkness of the abyss that many trans folks have to defeat just to be healthy and whole.

I was born a girl with a medical condition that required surgical and hormonal intervention to correct my birth defects. Nothing more.

I do like this way of saying it though! 


- Jaded Jade

[suzifrommd]

For me, it's more an intense feeling that if I somehow COULD become female it would be the most wonderful thing that could happen to me.

[Jill F]

I'm a girl who was dealt a "Y" chromosome with the body and expectations that go along with it.  I tried to cope the best I could and hoped I could just get by as-is until I could no longer do so.  Once my brain began to run on the correct hormones, it became evident that I was best off with the body aligned to the brain.

It's also nice to rock a cute maxi skirt.

[Jaime R D]

I was born with the wrong brain.

[Pikachu]

I've always felt it fit me well. I definitely feel like a woman trapped in a man's body.

[stephaniec]

my phenotype got confused and ended up the mirror image of my genotype 

[AnonyMs]

I can't work it out either, but I've decided it doesn't matter. Its been driving me crazy and the only thing that helps is moving towards transitioning.

HRT feels great, stopping is terrible. I've been around that loop a few times, and now I really don't care what the reason for it all is.

[Juliett]

I was born a girl with a medical condition that required surgical and hormonal intervention to correct my birth defects. Nothing more.

This is exactly how i see it. We have a birth defect that needs fixing, the same as anyone else.

[♥︎ SarahD ♥︎]

There is a lot of evidence, good hard science, that gender is controlled by a number of genes, mutations in them, including the androgen receptor genes are responsible for gender ID.

Have to remember as well that there are over 300 natal females who have given birth who are XY. The numbers are small because most people are not karyotyped routinely.

So I would go with gender misassigned at birth since it was based on external physical gender characteristics.

This is pretty much the way I'm looking at it right now.  It's still kind of a "X brain in Y body" perspective, but it's a little more technically descriptive.  Saying something along the lines of "I have/had an androgen resistance/intolerance which caused my brain and several physical characteristics to develop to be more atypically female than male, so I am / have been / will be changing my body to match" (or vice-versa for FtM, or some shade of grey for non-binaries etc) actually makes a lot of sense.  And the science does back that standpoint up - MtF transexuals for example have been shown to have brain activity (while in an MRI scanner) far more consistent with cis-female brains than cis-male brains.

So personally I think the "X brain in Y body" is a fairly accurate description and is a nice shoot-from-the-hip type explanation, but having a slightly fuller description like above underlines the point that there's real science backing this up, plus it highlights the fact that gender isn't all about what's between your legs and that transsexualism isn't some kind of mental disorder (it's a mis-match between the body and the brain, and it's no one's fault).  I also think it's a good segway for talking about GD too (I agree with Jaded Jade on that one - GD isn't talked about enough in these conversations I don't think).

One other thing I would like to point out though:

I was born with the wrong brain.

With all due respect hun, I personally feel this is a completely backwards way of thinking about it ♥︎

At the end of the day, you are your brain.  The body is nothing more than a vehicle for transporting you around.  If you removed the brain from the body, and plugged it into another one (even an artificial / mechanical / virtual one), you would still be you, with all your personality and memories.  Whereas another brain being plugged into your body would be a different person without your memories or personality, but their own instead (sure, it would *LOOK* like you, but it wouldn't actually *BE* you, if that makes sense? ).  Remember the cells of the body are constantly dying and being re-born a new, whereas most of the cells of your brain, spine and nervous system generally stay with you for most of your life.  The brain you have now is pretty much the brain you were born with, whereas the body you have now isn't the same body that you had even 7 years ago.  The body is "disposable" (don't take that too literally though lol), whereas the brain is you, your soul, your spirit.

This kinda thinking (that I had the wrong brain) is what kept me in denial for so many years.  I tried to change the brain to match the body, which is not only impossible, but is also (I have come to realise) really wrong and stupid even if it could be done.  Why should I change who I am just to fit in with this shell I've ended up with?  Doesn't it make far more sense to change the shell to fit who I actually am inside?  Trying to change your brain to match your body would be like a cis-woman (for example) changing her body to male just to suit the masculine car that she drives.  Surely it makes more sense to change the car, doesn't it? ♥︎

[Sephirah]

This is kind of hard for me to answer. I am hesitant to say I was born in the wrong body. Mostly because it gets me to thinking that if I'd been born in the right body, my mind would likely be different in that my experiences, feelings and interactions would likely have led me down a different path. I guess I prefer to think of it in terms of my body builder misreading the blueprint created by my mind architect, and making incorrect changes at birth to the plumbing, wiring, and a putting in a water feature that definitely wasn't built to spec. It built an apartment block instead of a quaint little cottage, lol.

[Jaime R D]

One other thing I would like to point out though:
With all due respect hun, I personally feel this is a completely backwards way of thinking about it ♥︎

At the end of the day, you are your brain.  The body is nothing more than a vehicle for transporting you around.  If you removed the brain from the body, and plugged it into another one (even an artificial / mechanical / virtual one), you would still be you, with all your personality and memories.  Whereas another brain being plugged into your body would be a different person without your memories or personality, but their own instead (sure, it would *LOOK* like you, but it wouldn't actually *BE* you, if that makes sense? ).  Remember the cells of the body are constantly dying and being re-born a new, whereas most of the cells of your brain, spine and nervous system generally stay with you for most of your life.  The brain you have now is pretty much the brain you were born with, whereas the body you have now isn't the same body that you had even 7 years ago.  The body is "disposable" (don't take that too literally though lol), whereas the brain is you, your soul, your spirit.

This kinda thinking (that I had the wrong brain) is what kept me in denial for so many years.  I tried to change the brain to match the body, which is not only impossible, but is also (I have come to realise) really wrong and stupid even if it could be done.  Why should I change who I am just to fit in with this shell I've ended up with?  Doesn't it make far more sense to change the shell to fit who I actually am inside?  Trying to change your brain to match your body would be like a cis-woman (for example) changing her body to male just to suit the masculine car that she drives.  Surely it makes more sense to change the car, doesn't it? ♥︎

Something you may not know about me is that I'm not a fan of explaining why I am what/who I am. I think it doesn't matter why we're trans, we are, we're not actually hurting anyone by being who we are. If they claim we are, then that's their own issues and hangups talking. So when asked, I may give a different answer every time. Also, I think that too many of us try to justify why we are and that's just not a good idea in the long run.

[Edge]

I guess I see it more being born with the wrong primary and secondary sex characteristics.

[FTMax]

I was born a girl with a medical condition that required surgical and hormonal intervention to correct my birth defects. Nothing more.

I fully jive with the being born in the wrong body statement.

But, Natalie's quote is how I have explained it to other people.

I think the issue you encounter when you tell someone that your body and brain don't match is that they don't/can't understand why you can't just change the brain. In their minds, certainly it must be easier to go to therapy or take a prescription medication for the rest of your life instead of transitioning, taking hormones, and having surgeries. They haven't had the experience, they can't genuinely understand it.