Sometimes I honestly feel insecure about being trans & I wish I could just live as a very girly looking androgynous gay who wears makeup, woman's clothes, etc. I wish I can live that way until I get FFS because I feel my features are too strong & it makes me insecure. Also, I'm kind of tall for a girl so it makes me feel awkward too. I sometimes want to cut off all my hair but remain feminine featured & girly looking but the problem is my boobs. They're the reason I began wearing a bra in the first place. My nipples are just inflated & awkward & if I don't wear a bra it's completely evident that they're boobs & not man boobs (probably because I'm not very fat also). I wish there were a way for me to kind of live as a very effeminate boy with no facial hair who was androgynous. Stopping hormones isn't an option because I originally started them in the first place to look more like a girl & stop my facial hair & male features from developing further. I genuinely like looking like a girl & being a girl but I'm very insecure about my looks. I can't consider myself a guy in any way but I want to be androgynous? If that makes sense?
