This is a support site. You should be willing to step up and say to anyone who asks this is who we are, this is what makes us tick. That being said If you don't want to transition just say so, you don't have to explain that choice to anyone.
You have a lot of choices, you can chose to answer the person or not,
you can ignore that person. You can tell them I am not comfortable discussing that with you. If someone badgers you report their post. If the report is valid; I don't care who it is, Cindy and I will deal with it.
This was the post by one member...
Quote from: Shantel on November 18, 2014, 04:37:11 PM
I began my own transition some twenty years ago as MtF and finally reached a point where I felt I was actually suffering a certain amount of self delusion and decided that I preferred a more androgynous life style over that of a trans woman, so I became a bona fide member of the Androgyne forum which later became known as the Non Binary forum. I have found a happy balance there with others who share similar thoughts concerning gender and family and how we fit into the overall spectrum.
Unfortunately we have been questioned continually by certain MtF binary types about the validity of our thoughts and reasons for not transitioning fully, as if it is an affront to and an attack against heir own validation as female which has not been the intent at all. In my economy of thinking it would be rather unseemly and ill advised if I were to go to the MtF or FtM forum and continually question and harangue others about their gender ID and preference and deride their thinking making assertions about their mental fitness as if to invalidate them in a seemingly veiled but very obvious manner as has been done to the non binary members. TOS stands as an indictment against that very behavior
while certain mods continue to justify them as the rest of the staff looks the other way.
It's been a good run here for me at Susan's and I've come to enjoy knowing everyone on various levels being always kind and supportive to MtF and FtM and every stripe in between. However all that I have cited has left me and others some of whom have already left feeling disenfranchised as members and it is without any regrets that I sever my financial and emotional support from Susan's place rather than remain feeling continually frustrated. I hope that all here go on to live victorious and happy lives. Goodbye and know that I care for you all very much!
Auntie Shan
This was a post by another member...
Quote from: Kamiki on November 18, 2014, 11:39:57 AM
Even after my short time here I have seriously considered closing/deleting my account.
To be honest it (this place) is not as inclusive as I had led myself to believe. I see, all too often, people being lambasted or attacked for perfectly valid inquiries. Or worse, have seen said people have the worst assumed of them for entire threads, threads that were intended to ask a question instead become about the person defending themselves from all angles (A S.O. thread in particular where a young man was asking about his partner, and a couple transition threads come to mind). Then I realize that here, this place, is simply a microcosm of the world as it is and as such we will find people that irritate us, insult us, and in general people we would never associate with alongside those whom we find endearing and or comforting.
C'est l'humanité.
Kami
The problem as I see it is that some non-binary members are getting defensive and launching attacks and raising defenses at totally innocuous questions. There are individuals from both sides who are making others uncomfortable and giving this site unsupportive and unwelcoming atmosphere and that's a crying shame.
This is what I told the administrators...
Quote from: Susan on November 18, 2014, 01:15:16 PMThis is a support site people who give it an unsupportive atmosphere will be moved along.
1. Any person should be free to ask any question of any member or group on the site without receiving a negative reception.
2. People who consistently derail threads are about to see stepped up moderation, including making all of their posts require moderator approval.
3. Posts which violate TOS 10 and 15 may shortly become are now a bannable offense, with no excuses accepted.
4. I wrote once it's time to put away the daggers, and I mean it.
I knew I was seeing an abnormal level of deletion requests, and we could have fixed this problem months ago if people had been more honest in explaining to us exactly why they were requesting deletion.
This little Binary/Non-Binary war stops now. I am deadly serious. I will not hesitate to ban anyone who I feel is going out of their way to take offense at others posts. I will ban anyone who engages in personal attacks and/or makes any actively or passively aggressive posts whatever the provocation. I will perm ban in a New York minute anyone I feel who creates an unsupportive atmosphere on the site! You have been warned.
I would ask anyone Binary or not to report any posts they feel engage in these type activities. Don't assume Cindy or I have seen the same posts you have and deemed them acceptable, report them.
