I am assuming I'm not alone here.

[XiaoMei]

I have two lesbian friends, one bisexual friend, and a gay friend.
One of my lesbian friends turned her back on me when I told her my secret, and so did my Bisexual friend. They were both from the other state that I grew up in (I moved states)

Luckily, and strangely, my gay friend in my town and my lesbian friend over seas in Singapore accepts me.

Does anyone have this problem? Being judged by others in the LGBT community?


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[Destiny Marie]

Yep, my brother-n-law is gay and is just disgusted with me as he has stated to my wife. I do not understand why but I've just accepted it as it is what it is and I can not change his way of thinking as he can not change my situation.

[big kim]

Yes I've had gay people(mainly men)tell me how disgusting and wrong I am,shouldn't be in their bars and clubs,take photos without permission and out me.Those who know me will know my 2 word response!

[Clhoe G]

It's never happend to me all my friends where straight n totally left me when I started hormones.

But I have heard of cases where gays or lesbians alienate a transitioning friend from the group, they don't understand it n will say nasty things to us like "o your just gay" or "o your just a lesbian" but we are who we are, we are born not made, like we were born in the wrong body, they were born gay, bi or lesbian, so I really don't understand why this type of thing happens, I mean the whole LGBT community should be the very best that under stand this.

[Sammy]

I have encountered extremely close-minded lesbians. Yet, I have communicated with many lesbians and gays who are very accepting - but as for now, it seems that the most accepting and open-minded people seem to be bisexuals (both male and female, who themselves often face unmotivated and close-minded ridicule by their homosexual peers).

[Makenzie]

That's one variable in coming out,unfortunately.But the "good" thing about it is you find out who your true friends are for the long run.

[Eva Marie]

I have lots and lots of gay and lesbian friends and they all accept me. I think I am just very lucky though because I keep reading about the gay bias against trans people and I fully expect to run into it some day.

[ImagineKate]

I have no idea as I have not come out to my gay friends.

My trans friends (from here and outside of here) do fully accept me though.

[Missy~rmdlm]

Gay or straight...one will lose many friends at transition. Which is all I really needed to know about them as "friends."

[XiaoMei]

@Emily; Coincidentally my Mum doesn't support the idea of gays, lesbians, or bisexuals, but she completely supports transsexuals (aren't I lucky?) and although she doesn't support the idea of the homosexual statuses of people she doesn't judge them for it, she just thinks it's wrong. She only strongly dislikes bisexuals because in her mind they're "people who only think about sex all the time." I'm not sure if that's true or not, but I am fine with bisexuals.

@Makenize; That's true, but it am just too terrified to lose anymore friends . It made me realize just how shallow the average person is, and I guess the good thing is if I do come out eventually I won't be afraid anymore because I'll have nothing left to lose.

Eva Marie; You seem very lucky to avoid that situations!

ImagineKate; It's good that you found people you can surround yourself with (living in a small town, I have no one, just my gay friend,)

Misst~rmdlm; It's an unfortunate reality, all because people aren't educated on these subjects, not even a little..

Big Kim; That sounds really horrible, considering that gay people have it horribly, you'd think they'd get some form of understanding for Trans people. Not a lot, but enough to know that any Trans person is targeted and feels alone, just like any normal teen/adult gay would.

Davida; I'm sorry to hear that about your brother :/.

Clhoe G; You're pretty lucky - and I agree. It's such a shame, I've heard some gays/lesbians want Trans people excluded completely from the LGBT community. Sounds pretty messed up to me.


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[Valleyrie]

Every queer person I've come across has been cool with it and have been very accepting and supportive. They're all around my age group (teens) so that may be why. Younger people these days seem to be a lot more open-minded due to the awareness out there and I guess society's bull**** ideals and ignorance haven't affected them (from my experience, at least).

[TSJasmine]

Yes! For some reason, gay guys don't always like me. They're catty af. Some are sweet but I honestly don't trust many of them. Only select few & I scope their personalities like hell before I trust them. I've been talked ->-bleeped-<- about by too many gay guys & other tgirls to be an active member of the LGBT community in my age group. I've partied with them, known them for years, but they're all drunks going nowhere fast in life & they all just run their mouths. Fun to party with, but that's it. I won't exclude someone from my life for being homosexual or transgender, but I'm a bit more cautious than usual because of the background I've had with them. As for losing friends, I lost all the straight friends I had when I came out which was little to none. A lot of straight guys are really nice to me though. I'm not exactly a mean person, & I'm sure the generations are getting more accepting. I was only bullied in school the first year of high school & wasn't bullied that much at any other school I went to & although some of the straight guys were stupid af about me being trans, most were really nice to me.

[Tiffany]

Hi, where you from? I am from Singapore too

[Stephe]

The only people in my neighborhood who were extremely rude and openly hostile when I transitioned were some lesbians. Go figure. I actually said to them "Really? The only people who refuse to stop using my old male name are some Gay girls?" at a fairly large public gathering where plenty of people heard me. That pretty much ended that. It's weird that other minorities see us an "open season". Not sure what the dynamics are behind that, but it's been my experience.

[XiaoMei]

Valleyrie; How old are you? I'm 21 years old and I have friends as low as 4 years younger than me and they all turned their backs on me. I agree that with each new generation things are improving, but there is still a lot uneducated kids.

TSJasmine; It's hard, and I agree. I find it really hard to trust people now. If someone tries to be my friend they normally say "you're a loner, huh?" Because I just do my own things and avoid hanging out with people now, because if know there's a low probability that we'd remain friends.

Stephe; It is strange, I find that lesbians are more judge mental then gay people. But I'm thinking it's just to do with MTF transitions and not FTM's. The only logical thing I can think of for at least a few or a majority of them is the same reason men dislike MTF and that is, that they don't want to accidentally hit on a '->-bleeped-<-' or be hit on by one. Maybe that's not accurate but that's just my theory.

Tiffany; I am from Australia, but I am visiting Singapore in March next year.


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[Monica Jean]

At first I was surprised how many gay/lesbian folks were not supportive of trans people.  Then I thought about it,  they probably never met a trans person on any deep level,  just what they see on TV or at the drag show at the local gay bars.

For me,  every gay person I personally know has been supportive.  So far at least.

[LizMarie]

Transphobia among LGB people is rather well known. HRC spent years trying to ignore trans people until they were basically shamed into beginning to support them. Even now, HRC's support appears lukewarm and they have a lot of fence mending to do.

One person I know ended up having an open discussion with a transphobic gay guy. He basically said, "You've got a dick. Accept that you're gay!"

She countered by showing him photos of brain structures that showed the actual differences. She showed how gay males have brains that are very male in structure in most places, but that MTFs have brains that are very female in structure. She told me that the guy actually thought about this then realized that she really was not a gay guy.

Now add in that back in the 1960s and 1970s, it was apparently common for some gay males to try to transition to avoid the stigma of being "queer". My own endocrinologist queried me about this when I began HRT since he's been doing this since 1975.

So I suspect that some of the gay male issue is not understanding that being MTF trans is really biologically different than being gay. I don't know what the issue is in the lesbian world but I've been told that some lesbians fixate on being with "women" so much that they see transwomen as fake, no matter what the evidence says to the contrary. And that's not all lesbians, but some. Please note that lesbians are often influenced by some feminist writers who are clearly transphobic (the so-called "TERFs").

[Beverly]

Does anyone have this problem? Being judged by others in the LGBT community?

I cannot remember where i heard the quote, but.... "Just because someone is part of a minority, it does not mean they cannot be a small-minded, evil bigot"

[XiaoMei]

Michelle1; I was too, and it is extremely disappointing to me.

LizMarie; Would you happen to know where to find these exact images? I explained this to a few people in the past and they shut up usually. I'd like to make printable copies of this in the future for my workplace. It'd help explaining and educating it to my co-workers in the future.

I dislike feminism because they're very transphobic, and they usually pick on men. Some women claim that feminism is about equal rights. I remember reading somewhere a while ago that some feminist women felt upset because a lot of people judged them for being a feminist, because they said "feminism is about equality, don't they want that? It's the same thing as Egalitarism".

http://www.news.com.au/lifestyle/real-life/womenagainstfeminism-goes-viral-as-people-explain-why-they-dont-need-feminism-anymore/story-fnixwvgh-1227010590106


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[TSJasmine]

I don't even see how we really fit into the LGBT community honestly. I guess in the past I was a self-identifying gay male, but as of now, I'm a woman. I have some gay friends but overall, I'm not really in the LGBT community. I don't plan to become that close to it either cause a lot are dumb af.