First therapy session " On Becoming She"

[BeverlyAnn]

Everyone is entitled to happiness. Far to many of us sacrifice our happiness for somebody else to have their's. It is good to give but not at the cost of living in misery. You are only asking for one thing so consider how much you have given in the past. I don't consider it to be a selfish act to ask for the one thing you need to survive.

Dena is so right about sacrificing your happiness for someone else to have theirs.  My therapist pointed out my entire life, including my childhood where my younger disabled brother and my baby brother came first, when I married, my wife and child came first when my mother developed dementia, I quit my job to come to Atlanta to take care of her and my disabled brother.  When my wife had back surgery go bad and she had learn to walk all over again, I was taking care of her along with my mother and brother.  Now I'm 66 beginning transition, and my therapist says it's time for me to put myself first and my wife agrees. So I'm beginning my transition 18 years later than I would have liked but I'm not sure I was ready 18 years ago. 

[Dorian Wilde]

By becoming who I truly am is the greatest gift.
It unleashes my conscious barriers.
I can exist on a level of being present.
D

[kaitylynn]

The past just is, the future unknown...the present is a present to be enjoyed!

[Dorian Wilde]

While at therapy, issues were coming up that put gender dysphoria on the back shelf.
I guess I need to prioritize my levels of dysfunction.
I only hope my therapist offers a rewards card that after 10, I get one free. :-)
D

[Patti]

It was very good to read this thread for me as I start therapy Wednesday. To watch others process after they have made these first steps helps me prepare. I need to make sure I do the same so someone else months down the line can learn from my experience as well. We all have different experiences and each therapist has their own process but so much can be learned about how this all works in general.


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[kaitylynn]

You are absolutely right Suzi!  We are sisters (and brothers) when time is given to looking at who we are and it is really up to us to support.  Even therapists cannot truly understand the internals of "being trans" or transitioning unless they have actually lived it.  They rely on our experience(s) to help them help others.  In the end, we are able to give those that follow encouragement to see themselves and know they are not alone and not broken.

With love, respect and compassion.
>^..^<

[Patti]

I am quite glad that I found this site, writing up information for my appointment tomorrow I am buoyed by all those who have been posting over the last week that I have been using this site. It has helped me dredge up somewhat uncomfortable memories that I had buried deep down. I think after my  appointment I will make a posting going through it and sharing how it all goes. It may give others some ideas to help them.

And thanks Kaity, you hit the nail on the head, when we share with others it helps them understand. If one doesn't have these feelings I am not sure how they could really connect with someone who does without hearing it at the very least.

Well I need to run so I can start to take all this stuff that is in my head and put it on paper for tomorrow!

Suzi


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[Dorian Wilde]

The first appointment for me was monumental.
It was going from internalized, hiding and denial, to opening up.
By doing so, had a awakening effect.
It became real.
I was taking steps to peruse my dream/reality.
To take a step out of the dark, to be seen and heard.
I could have spent hours in my first session.
So much to say.
To hear myself verbalize what had been kept carefully guarded my whole life was like opening up the flood gates.
We are most likely the only ones who truly understand.
The clarity of the reality is empowering, allows oneself to proceed with purpose and direction.
Cheers to you!
D

[Patti]

Exactly what you said right there. I am going to make a post on this, or at least post a follow up on someone else's therapy post. I am on cloud 9 right now.


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[Tessa James]

The first appointment for me was monumental.
It was going from internalized, hiding and denial, to opening up.
By doing so, had a awakening effect.
It became real.
I was taking steps to peruse my dream/reality.
To take a step out of the dark, to be seen and heard.
I could have spent hours in my first session.
So much to say.
To hear myself verbalize what had been kept carefully guarded my whole life was like opening up the flood gates.
We are most likely the only ones who truly understand.
The clarity of the reality is empowering, allows oneself to proceed with purpose and direction.
Cheers to you!
D

Perfectly great prose for such a, yes, monumental, event.  You captured those feelings well and take me back, thank you and congratulations

[Dorian Wilde]

Gender dysphoria for me is like a boomerang.
There is no hiding or escaping it.

[Dorian Wilde]

......and always loops around and lands on my head!