How do I get skills needed to live independently?

[redhot1]

I'm 24 and I feel like I'm in a rut stuck at home now. I'm out of high school, but never went to a college of sorts. I never got a driver's license like everyone else. I also lack the skills needed for finding and keeping a job.

I'm still feeling like a younger teen in a 24 year old body. I want to move on with discovering who I truly am gender wise, but what now?

I don't feel like I have any marketable job qualities. I can get unpaid volunteer work,  but that's all I got for now. I never wanted to study and work at the same time.

It's not like I hate my body as a male  (I'm very sorry if I hurt anybody), but I really want to start my self-discovery as soon as possible.

I think if my parents died and I was the only one, I would never be able to feed or clothe myself.

[Cindy]

Ask your Mum to show you how to cook - and do it

Help with doing the housework - and do it.

If there are questions be honest - I don't know how to look after myself.

Go to the local bar, burger place and ask for a job. Say you'll work for half wages until you have the skills they need.

Start a mantra - I am responsible for me, no one else is.

Save your money, pay your folks some rent.

There is still a life out there and a good one for people who are motivated.

By asking the question you have started.

[sparrow]

Two ways I can see out of this rut: get unskilled work, or get skilled.  My recommendation is to go to school.  Find something to love.  Make it your life.  I was about 24 when I went back to school.  10 years later, I've got a PhD, I'm employed and I'm very happy with my life.  As I went along my path, I diverged with many of my friends -- almost everybody I've spoken to is happy with where they quit going to school: they got enough to find work they loved.  My friends with unskilled jobs are generally less satisfied with their lives -- in part, they can't keep a job because their bosses consider them to be expendable.

I didn't "grow up" until I moved out.  My dad was too damned good of a cook to let anybody learn in his kitchen! 

[Amoré]

hi redhot

The skills you are requiring can only be learned through experiencing life. That is getting out there and living life. Studying and working is not so bad I have been doing it for years and it keeps me busy and let me feel I am doing something with my life. You don't want to look back when you are old and say o ssssss I should have done it. Get out there push yourself. The only way you can go forward in life is by getting out of you comfort zone. Let me say that again! Get out of our comfort zone. Here are a lot of successful people on here and that is the key if you stay in you current comfort zone and keep breaking ourself down for being a failure then you are going no where.

You are still young don't be lazy. Get motivated!!!!!

Look for a career that you might like and strive towards it.

It sounds if your life has got no direction. You need direction.
Set goals and work towards that goals.

You can do it, just get off you but

Best of luck

[stephaniec]

I started as a cashier , pretty simple.

[Cindy]

I started as a drug addict, got over it. First home was a gutter.

Anything is better than that, I assure you.

[MeganAshley]

As Cindy pointed out, it can *always* be worse.

If you are in the US, look into Job Corps or The Peace Corps (Job Corps will keep you domestic while Peace Corps will give you opportunities overseas).
Job Corps will feed you, house you, teach you a trade of your choosing within reason. They will also help you with job placement after you complete their program.

It is all about motivation and life experiences. Only *you* can find *you* and what you love in life whether it be career or your gender discovery journey. But rest assured, we are all here to help you along the way.

*hugs*

[cheryl reeves]

Check out truck driving schools they will teach you to drive and get a drivers license and help getting a good paying job. My son is 25 and is also trans and is a trucker who brings home between 400 to 800 a week and has learned life skills doing it,he still lives at home but pays a monthly bill that I give him. Their are high paying jobs out their that requires very little training, for you get your main training on the job.

[KoreyCabra]

I'm 24 and I feel like I'm in a rut stuck at home now. I'm out of high school, but never went to a college of sorts. I never got a driver's license like everyone else. I also lack the skills needed for finding and keeping a job.

I'm still feeling like a younger teen in a 24 year old body. I want to move on with discovering who I truly am gender wise, but what now?

I don't feel like I have any marketable job qualities. I can get unpaid volunteer work,  but that's all I got for now. I never wanted to study and work at the same time.

It's not like I hate my body as a male  (I'm very sorry if I hurt anybody), but I really want to start my self-discovery as soon as possible.

I think if my parents died and I was the only one, I would never be able to feed or clothe myself.

As unorthodox or strange as it may seem..the biggest thing that helped me was getting a starter job and saving money until I could move out. And I pretty much moved out blind. I never got my license either so I lived in an area that had public transit. Everything that I never learned how to do or my mother never taught me, cooking, living on my own, bills and taxes-- I had no choice but to buckle down and do it myself. And I feel like as a person I grew from the experience. It wasn't always happy or easy, but I did what I had to do to keep a job and live my life. I moved back home temporarily and soon I will repeat the same process. I boot myself out the door into a brand new adventure and while it is scary, I've never felt more confident and secure in myself despite the trans issues I face.

While you are not in the exact same boat as me, I would suggest taking smaller steps to try things you've never done. And honestly, in doing so you might learn more about yourself. For example, your first task could be to make a working resume. You could do a workout to places in your area to see who is hiring. You could ask your parent(S) to help you cook something for dinner, or try something relatively safe in the kitchen yourself and surprise her. Figure out the wonders of the washing machine on your own clothes. There are tons of different ways or little "mini" projects you could take up. I made a huge jot list of stuff I never tried or learned how to do and I just put my foot in the door and tried, even if I failed I would try again.