Facial Changes on HRT after 1 year. what's reasonable?

[seldom]

you are probably more likely to notice it than them, as when you get hugged it can hurt 

still hurts when people hug me actually lol.

Mine hurt all the time, but that is what I get for quick growth. 

Posted on: October 21, 2007, 07:33:03 PM

While I would never set myself to be an arbitrer of passability, since I don't really care either way since its not my life, I do think that there is a big taboo about at least stating our honest opinion about a person's passability (its arrogant if we state that this opinion is universal; it may well be if nobody ever tells a person the truth, or she's not ready to accept it).

One thing that's certain. What's seen as "looking like men" to us, may be perceived differently by non trans, especially in outside trans hotspots. There, it may simply be seen as being unattractive. Many women with "manly" traits exist and they are seen as not attractive, but still women.

...another very good post...

Best post on passing ever. 
It speaks more to the reality of passing.  To tell you the truth I am passing rather well in DC.  Again, not a trans-aware city.
 

[Rachael]

I really don't know your age but when you are younger, coming out is still a choice of yes or no but  only temporarily. As for me in time it becomes more part of the survival instinct.

Cindy   

I think i speak for every young trans person when i say your wrong. You might have been able to live through a longer part of your life without transition, but doesnt mean we can. Personally, i agree with you, it was transition or die. Dont try and tell us  because were young we have so much time on out hands and that our coming out is less important...
R

[cindybc]

That is not what I meant and I am sorry if I came off sounding like that.  What I meant is that being a younger person at least gives you time to work out any hang-ups and problems facing a transperson. 

As for the effects and the end product, we discussed that on many different occasions on this thread and other threads. An important subject of discussion, to be sure. The effects of the mones can vary greatly from one individual to another. The difference in age can also greatly influence the effectiveness of the hormones.  The type of hormones taken is another thing.

Basically what I am saying is that the younger TS at least have time on their side compared to an elder.  The results of HRT are individualized but those who transition at a younger age seem to have more pleasing results. 

If I am way off to left field, I will refrain from participating on this thread.

Cindy     

[Berliegh]

I really don't know your age but when you are younger, coming out is still a choice of yes or no but  only temporarily. As for me in time it becomes more part of the survival instinct.

Cindy   

I think i speak for every young trans person when i say your wrong. You might have been able to live through a longer part of your life without transition, but doesnt mean we can. Personally, i agree with you, it was transition or die. Dont try and tell us  because were young we have so much time on out hands and that our coming out is less important...
R

I agree with you Rachael. But what happened to me was I started young but still ended up being older because of the U.K NHS system...a lot of time was lost and I don't want that to happen to younger transitioners in the U.K like yourself.

I have been working with various people and organisations to prevent the 'stalling' that some of the NHS GIC Clinics promote ...

It's good that you have managed to start on HRT as soon as you did..

[Rachael]

well first through self medication out of desperation! now because of my genetic mess the doc thinks its wise...
im with you nicole... im having a hard job looking anything but female, and i know the soreness thing on the face! omg i do! i havent had any hair removal yet, but dont need much, hrt is clearing a lot, but i do intend to get some, cos my skin so sensative i cut and rash instantly, even at the slightest softest shave >< i dont have enough to shaddow, but i dont really want to let it grow for laser, is it that necesery to have stubble for that? EW, any road up, less that 1mm stubble takes nearly 2 weeks ><

R

[Rachael]

mines nearly gone from my toplip because of hrt...
i have less there than some natal girls
R

[shanetastic]

The only place I grow facial hair is on my chin and right around my adams apple oddly enough.  I don't really understand why it was always impossible to grow hair, but I'll accept that as a blessing for the time being


Going back to Cindy now,

Hi Shanetastic

Well only you will know when the time has come for you to introduce yourself to the rest of the world as yourself, but from what I gather you are already well on the way into transitioning. When I came out there was little options available, and if you are young don't get in to much of a rush. Let yourself grow into it spiritually and mentally as well as the physical progress.

For me an elder person it came to either go full time or end my life, no middle road in this game so I decided on the former decision which sounded much more appealing to me then a Manila Hemp tie.

I really don't know your age but when you are younger, coming out is still a choice of yes or no but  only temporarily. As for me in time it becomes more part of the survival instinct.

Cindy   

I'm really taking it slow for the time being, I'm 19 by the way, so yeah still a little young.  Just my parents and I decided to rather take it slow so that everyone has time to adjust and everything, which I agree with, I'm in no real hurry anyways.  Still have to finish up school until December, so I have some time for sure.

As for the problems we faced, for me it was a different one.  It wasn't so much as going full time or ending it, it was a matter of doing something and stop living a pointless life or ending it.  I know, a little different, but still somewhat similar problems in a sense I guess. 

As for the whole coming out part, my brother is next in line, then my one best friend that I think will be okay with it.  Really, the only person that matters to me for acceptance is my brother, and I think he is really open and accepting of people who are gay and stuff, so I can only hope he'll be accepting of me.  After all, he lives in San Fran, and they all think one of his roommates is gay and no one cares anyways haha.  In all honesty though, I lost most of my friends when I moved away a while ago to get rid of everyone, so even if no one decides to be my friend through this, I'll be okay with it.  I have a support group and people in there to be my friend gosh

What I meant is that being a younger person at least gives you time to work out any hang-ups and problems facing a transperson. 

This is true as well I think to some extent.  I know everyone's case is different, but really, the only hang up and problems that I've encountered so far was getting my therapist to agree with me lol .  She didn't have very much experience on this whole matter, so things got aggrivating at times, but that's been the only problem so far.  Now the next problem will come after Christmas, when that "slowly transitioning" thing starts to take place.  By then I should have like four months of HRT, so I figured I could start slowly adapting to this for both my sake and my parents.  But until then, no worries really!  Besides if this laser hair removal will work on my chin and neck

[Omika]

I've been on HRT (without the spiro) for, like, two months?  It's not magic, but the first thing I noticed was my arms slimming down and my hips shaping up a bit.  Both make me very happy, especially the arms as they were a big source of anxiety for me (I've never had any body fat to speak of.)  As my roommate said, who has noticed the differences also, a year ago I was "cut from wood" and now I'm just soft.

It's not going to be like someone plunking a magic wand on your head and making all the bad things go away, so just get over it.  It takes a lot of time, no matter who you are, and while I sometimes worry if the changes I see are imaginary, I know my own body well enough to realize they aren't.  It's subtle and it's gradual.  After all, once you get on HRT, does any amount of understanding the effects beforehand affect your results?  No, it doesn't.  This is something outside of your control.  So do what I do and be happy with what you get.

Sooo...  just go for it and see what happens?  There's no other way to find out, and I will say that no matter who you are, the mental effects are wonderful.  I feel like a toxin has been removed from my body, and I can think much more clearly.

Just take it all with a grain of salt.

~ BB

[Rachael]

Shanetastic: your so lucky, when i told my parents, they threw me out... i didnt ask anything for them, but they claimed i was hurting them, and i should give up myself, my life, my hopes and dreams, and even my happyness, for them, for thier happyness and hopes and dreams...
what a crock o S***
R

[shanetastic]

Shanetastic: your so lucky, when i told my parents, they threw me out... i didnt ask anything for them, but they claimed i was hurting them, and i should give up myself, my life, my hopes and dreams, and even my happyness, for them, for thier happyness and hopes and dreams...
what a crock o S***
R

Yeah I know I'm really lucky for just having parents that don't really care, "As long as I'm happy."  Heh, so I guess I got on the lucky side of that.  They even have paid for my therapy and doctor visits so far.  But from what it seems like Rachael, least everything has worked out for you as it seems from what I have read here and there.  I don't get how you could have taken that or made it through, but I'm sure it made you a better person, after all, I don't think anyone wants you to inherit those traits your parents have showed you

Anyways, I'm glad your doing fine now, and hopefully they'll come around soemtime in their lifetime.  Normally people tend to do that, from what I've seen.

[Rachael]

what have you read here and there about me doing alright?[/shock]
R

[shanetastic]

Haha oh gosh challenging my memory now!!!

Well lets see. . . you have a doctor (I think that's something to be happy about)   You took that photo and sent it in for that magazine right?  And what else, my memory isn't the best haha.  My lurking skills are too great!  But my memory isn't!

[Rachael]

did a mag shoot once, yeah, i my general practiioner (physitian) prescribes me hrt from a IS specialist endos say so, after much fighting for even that, i wont get to see the nhs gender clinic therapists for another 5 years... i cant afford a private one, good thing: loosing weight bad reason: i cant afford to eat since my parents threw me out and i lost my part time job with staff cuts... its my 21st birthday tomorrow, and im wondering if anyone of my numerous fiends will find the time to remember. and i doubt my parents will aknowlage it, my grandmother, the only member of my family who loved me still (cos my parents wouldnt let me tell her ><) died last week.
my lifes pretty crumby right now...
R

[shanetastic]

did a mag shoot once, yeah, i my general practiioner (physitian) prescribes me hrt from a IS specialist endos say so, after much fighting for even that, i wont get to see the nhs gender clinic therapists for another 5 years... i cant afford a private one, good thing: loosing weight bad reason: i cant afford to eat since my parents threw me out and i lost my part time job with staff cuts... its my 21st birthday tomorrow, and im wondering if anyone of my numerous fiends will find the time to remember. and i doubt my parents will aknowlage it, my grandmother, the only member of my family who loved me still (cos my parents wouldnt let me tell her ><) died last week.
my lifes pretty crumby right now...
R

Well first off,

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!! (tomorrow of course but if I forget )

As for the part time job and staff cuts, I can relate to you there.  My job just did the same thing, but I kept it but am hardly working there anymore so I'm looking for a new job as well.  As for your grandmother, I'm sorry about that   I can't relate much to that because none of our relatives in my family actually care to talk to us or send us happy birthday or christmas cards or anything.  By the way, you seem pretty social, don't you have like a support group of friends you can talk to about this to help?  I know I'm trying to keep the optimism high, when in reality it's not.

[cindybc]

Hi shanetastic

Thank you for your response. That is what I meant by being younger at least one has time on their side, *not could put it off indefinitely,* sorry if that was the impression I gave.. I think it is wonderful to see young people have an early start at their new life.

When I was here 7 years ago there were not as many young folks, actually young members in their teens were near none existent back then. It is wonderful to see young people  begin a new life that will be an ongoing learning experience for a good many years ahead of them. So you see an older person may not have all the options that a younger person have the opportunity to accomplish, not just in the trade or work force but in their private lives as well.

I was lucky, maybe I had a guardian angel watching over me. I had my mate before I even started full time. In comparison to the first two relationships I had this one feels like in was made in paradise in comparison.

Cindy

[shanetastic]

Hi shanetastic

Thank you for your response. That is what I meant by being younger at least one has time on their side, *not could put it off indefinitely,* sorry if that was the impression I gave.. I think it is wonderful to see young people have an early start at their new life.

When I was here 7 years ago there were not as many young folks, actually young members in their teens were near none existent back then. It is wonderful to see young people  begin a new life that will be an ongoing learning experience for a good many years ahead of them. So you see an older person may not have all the options that a younger person have the opportunity to accomplish, not just in the trade or work force but in their private lives as well.

I was lucky, maybe I had a guardian angel watching over me. I had my mate before I even started full time. In comparison to the first two relationships I had this one feels like in was made in paradise in comparison.

Cindy

Cindy   

I didn't think that you meant to put it off indefinitely, so no worries.  I've already tried that and thought I could success   (yes bad mistake).  I understand what you are trying to say, being young you still have that will and anxious to get started, but ultimately, you have more time to do it right in a sense I think is what you were trying to say.  I have to agree with you in the sense that the young people of today are really blesses indeed.  It's not to have a world that's a little bit more understanding of this.  Of course, the medical field has progressed severly within those years as well.

I still think we still share some of the same problems as well though, but for the most part, the new generation (Y I think it is?) is much more understanding and accepting for the most part.  The one thing my parents are always concerned about, which I'm trying to break them away from, is the fact that they think that everyone is a horrible person and lives to discriminate.  I'm pretty realistic in the sense that some people are horrible indeed, but that doesn't mean everyone is.

As for options for younger people, I believe that compared to the older transitioners, we do have more options as well.  Sure, we'll miss out on some things too, such as a family and kids, but I never wanted a family and kids as living as a male either way.  Yes, I'm still like the 4812043 others people out there who wish they would have started earlier, because I hit an intense growth spirt and grew way too tall!!!  But still regardless, just something that happened and nothing to worry about in the long run I don't think.  No use in trying to change the past when it's already over

When people normally see younger people transitioning, this is what I've heard from them, "Unlike me, when your done with this process, you'll have a lot greater of a chance that this whole TS past thing can be put behind for the most part" (from a couple older TS people who said they didn't pass so well).  Sure, I don't agree with that in some ways, but still, I can always hope that it won't be that thing at the surface always bothering me.  Either way, thanks for the reply cindy, and hopefully that's sums up a little bit about the different perspectives of what at least I think of younger and older people.


I forgot to add, really in some extent, I don't know who has it easier, the older people or younger.  I have to tell the school in which I decide to go about this and change all my transcripts and stuff when I finally get to that stage.  But compare that to coming out to work and stuff, either one is hard.  For the time being, I still don't know what I'm going to do about my living situation when I move or anything, and if I do that through the school it's going to be really challenging to say the least I think.  So that's another major concern right now.  I know this can be considered that ongoing learning experience I guess, but it's going to be an awkward stage if I can't find an apartment and have to live on campus or something like that.  I guess that's part of the beginning a new life?  And the complications that come with it. 

[Rachael]

did a mag shoot once, yeah, i my general practiioner (physitian) prescribes me hrt from a IS specialist endos say so, after much fighting for even that, i wont get to see the nhs gender clinic therapists for another 5 years... i cant afford a private one, good thing: loosing weight bad reason: i cant afford to eat since my parents threw me out and i lost my part time job with staff cuts... its my 21st birthday tomorrow, and im wondering if anyone of my numerous fiends will find the time to remember. and i doubt my parents will aknowlage it, my grandmother, the only member of my family who loved me still (cos my parents wouldnt let me tell her ><) died last week.
my lifes pretty crumby right now...
R

Well first off,

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!! (tomorrow of course but if I forget )

As for the part time job and staff cuts, I can relate to you there.  My job just did the same thing, but I kept it but am hardly working there anymore so I'm looking for a new job as well.  As for your grandmother, I'm sorry about that   I can't relate much to that because none of our relatives in my family actually care to talk to us or send us happy birthday or christmas cards or anything.  By the way, you seem pretty social, don't you have like a support group of friends you can talk to about this to help?  I know I'm trying to keep the optimism high, when in reality it's not.

friends? yes, ones i could talk to about this? no, not really, one, but shes got the hump with me atm over a guy ><, but i dont feel like i have the right to burden my friends with this, id rather they forget it tbh...
R

[Tanya1]

wow nice post guys.

[shanetastic]

That's what friends are there for though.  If they have any problems they can openly talk to me, and vise versa.  Of course, it's hard to find a friend like that because being open with people is really difficult and you have to have a lot of trust in that person I understand.

wow nice post guys.

Sorry for the sorta thread jacking Tanya, but I think this somewhat has to deal with transitioning

[Kate]

The one thing my parents are always concerned about, which I'm trying to break them away from, is the fact that they think that everyone is a horrible person and lives to discriminate.

My parents are the same way, as are a few older people I know. Every time I TRY to tell them I get along just fine, that no one cares (who knows about my past), I always get this "Really? Well, I bet they DO care but just won't say anything" cynicism. It drives me crazy, I just can't convince them that 1) No one cared about me transitioning, and 2) I'm just an ordinary, kinda ugly middle-aged woman now, not "him" crossdressing in public.

because I hit an intense growth spirt and grew way too tall!!!

I'm 6'2".... and it hasn't been a problem (which really surprised me), except that guys seem to find it... interesting, lol.

~Kate~