How much did therapy help?

[Berliegh]

I was in therapy before coming out, so yeah

I wish we had some kind of therapy or councelling in the U.K.......

[cindianna_jones]

Pretty much, I saw the therapists to get my surgery.  And along the way, I received some help.

I think that getting therapy is a necessity in helping us along the way.  Even if your mind is clear, we still have a lot of additional crap heaped upon us.  It's nice to have a level headed, unbiased, and trained professional to help us see the signs on the road we travel.

Cindi

[Butterfly]

I've got to say that therapy helped me to set my priorities straight and opt for the right course in my transition. 

[tinkerbell]

Also, I would like to ask all of you to include your therapists' names and location under this link in order to help the new comers.  Thanks a bunch kitty cats!

https://www.susans.org/Medical/Therapists_and_Counselors/

tink

[Ell]

I was in therapy before coming out, so yeah

I wish we had some kind of therapy or councelling in the U.K.......

aw, c'mon! are you saying they don't have gender therapists in the UK??!!

-ell

[Berliegh]

I was in therapy before coming out, so yeah

I wish we had some kind of therapy or councelling in the U.K.......

aw, c'mon! are you saying they don't have gender therapists in the UK??!!

-ell

That's right, we don't.....I don't even know what a therapist does? the U.K doesn't have any kind of structure, councelling or help available like that for Gender Dysphoria. Ask Rachael or Fruity as well if you don't believe me..Also check out the link on the 'NHS or private' thread..

[Ell]

I was in therapy before coming out, so yeah

I wish we had some kind of therapy or councelling in the U.K.......

aw, c'mon! are you saying they don't have gender therapists in the UK??!!

-ell

That's right, we don't.....I don't even know what a therapist does? the U.K doesn't have any kind of structure, councelling or help available like that for Gender Dysphoria. Ask Rachael or Fruity as well if you don't believe me..Also check out the link on the 'NHS or private' thread..

but, but Redfish is from the U.K., and she says she went to therapy...

[Berliegh]

Ok, so where did Redfish go? I imagine it was private as the NHS do not offer any services like therapy...
I went to a NHS  London GIC for 6 years and no treatment or therapy was facilitated in the time I attended.

[Ell]

Ok, so where did Redfish go? I imagine it was private as the NHS do not offer any services like therapy...
I went to a NHS  London GIC for 6 years and no treatment or therapy was facilitated in the time I attended.

Berliegh, you're funny! Gender therapists are private in the U.S., too.

i've gone to a gender therapist since i started my transition, and i've paid 100 percent of the costs myself.

Likewise with my endocrinologist. i've paid all the expenses on my own, and all the prescriptions. and i'm not exactly rich, you know? it's just that i've made it a priority.

We don't have an NHS in the U.S.  Here, in most cases, when it comes to transitioning, you pay for it yourself, or you go without. i've got health insurance with my job, and it covers nothing for transitioning.

since i am afraid to get surgery overseas, i am literally looking at least $20,000 that i'll need to cough up, on my own, to get SRS. but before that, maybe another $10,000 or $15,000 for FFS.

-ell

[Ell]

I'm from North America

Redfish, i swear to god, if you don't stop bothering me. oh wait, you're not really bothering me anymore.

but you're still on my list.


your nemesis,

-ell 

[Berliegh]

Ok, so where did Redfish go? I imagine it was private as the NHS do not offer any services like therapy...
I went to a NHS  London GIC for 6 years and no treatment or therapy was facilitated in the time I attended.

Berliegh, you're funny! Gender therapists are private in the U.S., too.

i've gone to a gender therapist since i started my transition, and i've paid 100 percent of the costs myself.

Likewise with my endocrinologist. i've paid all the expenses on my own, and all the prescriptions. and i'm not exactly rich, you know? it's just that i've made it a priority.

We don't have an NHS in the U.S.  Here, in most cases, when it comes to transitioning, you pay for it yourself, or you go without. i've got health insurance with my job, and it covers nothing for transitioning.

since i am afraid to get surgery overseas, i am literally looking at least $20,000 that i'll need to cough up, on my own, to get SRS. but before that, maybe another $10,000 or $15,000 for FFS.

-ell

I paid privately for my treatment as well. I started with the NHS London GIC but for 2 years they refused hormones and I wasn't getting anywhere fast. So I went private to start on hormones and got them the same day.  I was still attending the NHS Clinic and my PCTwere paying them for my invisable treatment but they were doing absolutely nothing, I was running a parallel out of desperation and spending money I didn't have on private treatment. I'm glad I did and at first I was very nieve to think I would achieve anything though the NHS......

[Blanche]

Gender therapy's made all the difference.  What peeps have got to do is find a gender clinician that they confide in.

[Berliegh]

Gender therapy's made all the difference.  What peeps have got to do is find a gender clinician that they confide in.

....and I've still never had any therapy..

[Ell]

Gender therapy's made all the difference.  What peeps have got to do is find a gender clinician that they confide in.

....and I've still never had any therapy..

OK Berliegh, that's it! gloves off.

you are and always have been a cute and girly girl. yet you complain, like redfish and Kate, about stuff that lots of us on this site would love to have as problems.
Kate: "A man said 'Hi sweetie,' and held the door for me, and I felt like I was somehow tricking him..."
redfish: "I'm ordinary..." (also cute, smart, in college, scheduled for SRS soon, etc., etc., etc.)
Berliegh: "My boobs aren't big enough...i don't know what a gender therapist is..." (Hello? You're already a beautiful, fully realized young woman. Deal with that! what do you need a gender therapist for?

i am still referred to, everywhere i go, as Sir. now that, my dear, is a freakin' problem, ok? but do you hear me complaining about it? have i ever said, oh dear, people call me Sir...(woe is me). no. instead, yesterday i went shopping and bought the most beautiful girly blouse i have ever seen. and paid only a little more than ten dollars. then i went home, put a bobbie pin in my hair, spent an hour and fifteen minutes putting on eye liner, put on my new blouse, and went dancing.

it was so great. the cute bartender always gives me the eye, and sometimes kisses my hand.

it was "bear" night at the GLBT club, and i met this really nice boy that had never spoken to a person in the middle of transition. we had a very interesting conversation. after i went back and did some more dancing, i bumped into him on the way out, and he offered to walk me to my car, which i thought was really sweet.

so, my advice to you, Kate and redfish is, now's the time to start living, girls. the whole world is just waiting to see what you are going to do.

-ell

[shanetastic]

I think your eye is pretty ell

As for the other people, we all have our own insecurities and some people like to talk about them and express them while others, such as you I guess? would rather just deal with it and not talk about it?

[Ell]

I think your eye is pretty ell

Oh, thank you!

ok, i will say, for the record, that i really do like and respect Kate, redfish, and Berliegh. i just like to bug them a little (because they make me so jealous) and i am happy that they are having such great and successful transitions, though they themselves, apparently, don't seem to realize just how lucky they are...

-ell 

[Dora]

I do things differently anyhow....like I said I'm a pickle. It would seem to me that many cannot wait until they go fulltime. I can.....due to financial reasons wich will not be cleared up until next August. I am going to wait until I cannot pass in boy mode anymore, and when society says..hey you are a girl....then I'd better start doing as the girls do. Until then, I choose the path of --- I am not a bold in your face accept me for who I am type of person and even though I look like a man you have to treat me like a woman!!--- I am totally way too sensitive to be bashed upon, sneered to, and laughed at. When I HAVE to go fulltime, then its time for me and I will go back to therapy. If that day never comes, then I will curse the gods and exit gracefully.

Lori, thank you for putting into words what I've been feeling since the day I started HRT. I too am not in a big hurry.

-Dora

[shanetastic]

I think your eye is pretty ell

Oh, thank you!

ok, i will say, for the record, that i really do like and respect Kate, redfish, and Berliegh. i just like to bug them a little (because they make me so jealous) and i am happy that they are having such great and successful transitions, though they themselves, apparently, don't seem to realize just how lucky they are...

-ell 

Hehe oh.  Well they've all be on like HRT for a year plus though haven't they ell.  If I remember right you haven't been on for that long. . . I know it's been a little while of course but not that long if my memory still works.  Try still having to live as a male until the end of December

[Berliegh]

ok, i will say, for the record, that i really do like and respect Kate, redfish, and Berliegh. i just like to bug them a little (because they make me so jealous) and i am happy that they are having such great and successful transitions, though they themselves, apparently, don't seem to realize just how lucky they are...

-ell 

ell......thanks....and I'm flattered you think I Look ok.......but there's nothing successful about my transtion and to be honest I haven't really had a transition. The only thing that's happened to me is HRT so far. It's been a long journey....

and how do you know what Kate or Redfish look like?

[Berliegh]

i have read lots of posts by both Kate and redfish (despite being my arch nemeses, they are also two of my favorites on this site, but please don't tell them that) if you also go back and read their posts, you would see what i mean about their charmed lives; you won't need to see their pictures. though, Kate actually posted her pic(s) at one point, and she is naturally girly and cute; likewise, redfish temporarily posted her prom pic (which i didn't actually see) and everybody went gaga over it. if you ask her politely, she may post it, temporarily, again.

and as for you, i just don't know what to say! i take back what i said about you not even needing a gender therapist. er, maybe you should go see one, my dear.

a) may i suggest that you see a female gender therapist.
b) get a list of gender therapists in your area from your local NHS gender center, or from other Trans women that live in your area
c) don't rely on the NHS for anything else but information! set the money aside, yourself, for your first session, then contact the gender therapist either by phone or e-mail, and make an appointment.
d) expect that the therapist may take a week or so to schedule you in. if she estimates that it will take longer than that to see you, choose another therapist. in no case should you have to wait to longer than a week to 10 days to be seen.

in the meantime, please keep in mind that though you may not see yourself as transitioning successfully, we, other Trans women, see you as:

a) totally feminine in appearance
b) totally passable
c) totally feminine in personality
d) fully capable of (and succeeding at) the RLT
e) fully capable of going stealth if you wish to
f) successfully transitioning because of all of the above

-ell

I don't think so.......I think you are another planet Ell......I spent many years going through the NHS London GIC sytstem, 7 in all and I was denied HRT for 2 years and denied GRS after 7 years of the RLT. I have complied totally with the protocols of the HBSOC.......yet this is the way I was treated. 

I had to go private to start on HRT and started on hormones the same day and 6 months after leaving the NHS London GIC I now two surgical proceedures lined up. I went through hell for 7 years with the NHS London GIC where I was bullied by two physichiatrists and not treated with any respect. I never saw any gender therapists while I attending the clinic. In some parts of the U.K the waiting list is anything up to 5 years to see a Psychiatrist...

Do I want a therapist? not really.....besides I don't know how to locate one? yellow pages? who knows? ......anyway I seem to be doing ok now I've started working on my own......and at last run my own ship...