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Dating straight men - passable vs. non passable

Started by richie, August 12, 2016, 02:12:31 PM

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richie

Hello,

I recently discovered something interesting about men and their attraction to transgirls. I've always heard that transgirls should be prepared for a lot of rejection from men but this honestly seems to be a case by case thing.

I have a friend who I started transitioning with. She is honestly one of the prettiest and possibly one of the most passable transgirls I've seen.
She's 5'4, very feminine and pretty face, small shoulders, 22 inch waist, and size 7.5 women's shoes. (i only know this because we go shopping together a lot, lol)
Basically, if you hung out with her for a day, you honestly couldn't tell.  Even her voice is feminine. She would just be a pretty girl to even the most observant person. Everything about her is so dainty and girly. She looks "more cis" than basically all the cisgender girls i know.

Her experience with men is very positive. She only gets rejected by about 25% of the guys she talks to even though she's pre-op! just a ballpark estimate, obviously
She's even had drop dead gorgeous boyfriends in the past that proudly flaunted her around.

Now, for me, my experience is quite different. Guys often end up treating me like a piece of meat. Keep in mind that (in the poster's opinion)guys are still <not allowed> to cis girls, so imagine how they'd treat me. lol
I'm basically the very last resort for guys that aren't attractive in anyway- physically, personality wise, etc.
My rejection rate is more like 80% simply because guys can tell i'm trans if they look hard enough.
My hands, shoulders, face, etc.
Even though I (think) I pass, it's still kind of obvious that I'm trans.


So a man's approach to transgirls is honestly a case by case basis. Anyone else agree?
Kind of disheartening that looks seem to be a very high priority for men, but what can ya do?  :-\

Moderator's Edits: There are two violations of Terms of Service.  10, No bashing and 11 no profanity. While we sometimes think our observations are universal, often they are personal opinion
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Soli

maybe case by case is better than men considering all (cis) women the same.

Like my roommate does... women are like this or like that, they wear their emotions on their sleeve, so many clichés, I think he knows really nothing about women, probably never was with one for more than a night, and that his sayings and thoughts are quite typical of hetero men as to how he sees this mass of skin and pretty hair moving on the streets or in the restaurants he works at, it's just potential for sex, that's all he sees, and the funny thing is that since I've cut off my jeans and got me a bikini top to sunbath all summer on the balcony, he's actually troubled as his minds automatically connects the smooth skin, my butt, my legs to potential sex, and the second after his rational adds: but with extra parts, then he mumbles something or says F... as he sees my skin in the sun before returning into his room. It's quite obvious he thinks I have a pretty hot bod, just missing a little more boobs... and I take his astonishment seeing me almost naked in the sun as a compliment.

Also when I told him I'm trans, in fact a woman, our relationship changed whereas I didn't represent a threat to his alpha maleness anymore (what a girl thinks has no importance), he just doesn't give any credit to what I say anymore as opposed to before he would challenge everything I would say. I'm slowly changing him though.
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