Using 3rd person pronouns in front of a person.

[Paige]

Hi All,

Growing up my parents taught me it was rude to refer to a person in front of you with 3rd person pronouns.  In the discussion of pronouns and transgender people, I'm always reminded of this. 

Recently there's been a rather large controversy at the University of Toronto because one of the professors refuses to use genderless pronouns and decided to make a public stink on youtube.

http://www.cbc.ca/radio/asithappens/as-it-happens-friday-edition-1.3786140/i-m-not-a-bigot-meet-the-u-of-t-prof-who-refuses-to-use-genderless-pronouns-1.3786144

I think he's basically a jerk looking for attention and now playing the martyr.

But the thing that keeps coming to my mind is when you're talking to someone why are you using 3rd party pronouns anyway?

Just curious,
Paige

[Elis]

It simply makes people more comfortable if they feel neither male or female or a mix of the two. Plus it's easier for the latter to use gender neutral pronouns instead of having to ask people that today they feel comfortable using masculine or female pronouns.

We use gender neutral pronouns daily for people we don't know eg. They are other there; I'm meeting them at so and so place. So logically it shouldn't be considered strange when we do know the person.

So yeah; why cause a fuss; whatever makes the person comfortable; no need to not use proper pronouns just because it makes you uncomfortable

[barbie]

My eldest son, who lives in Los Angeles, denoted me as 'that person' when ordering a dish for dinner at a restaurant. I thought my son is thoughtful.

barbie~~

[Paige]

It simply makes people more comfortable if they feel neither male or female or a mix of the two. Plus it's easier for the latter to use gender neutral pronouns instead of having to ask people that today they feel comfortable using masculine or female pronouns.

We use gender neutral pronouns daily for people we don't know eg. They are other there; I'm meeting them at so and so place. So logically it shouldn't be considered strange when we do know the person.

So yeah; why cause a fuss; whatever makes the person comfortable; no need to not use proper pronouns just because it makes you uncomfortable

Hi Elis,

I understand gender neutral pronouns and support them.  I guess I didn't explain myself.  Growing up if I was talking with a some people, I was taught to refer to them by their name and not use the third person he or she.   And I believe the same courtesy should apply to everyone.  Wouldn't this make some of the 3rd person pronoun stuff easier.

Paige

[Elis]

I meant people in general being uncomfortable; not necessarily yourself . I think if we kept referring to people by name it would become irritating. I don't know why; I suppose we're only used to people calling us by our names when we're being called over or when someone doesn't know you very well (it can be considered rude if someone keeps calling you by your name having thought you had become friends) or when we're being told off.

For me personally I don't like it when someone keeps using my name and I guess we can't assume everyone wouldn't mind it. Words are confusing