The only thing that has to change about me is the fact I have a dick!!

[Rachael]

learn to not be so serious... i was taking the mickey... i only advise circular saws for trimming toenails..
R

[Wing Walker]

I notice that we hear nothing more from Robbie.

Wing Walker
LMAO

Edit: Removed name calling ~ Kate

[Rachael]

zomg, they wernt serious? omg! my precious support time!
R

[cindybc]

Hi Rachael
Ya I guess the fun's over unless one of us wants to take up chainsaw juggling.

Cindy

[Robbie]

When writing that post I was pointing out how absurd many of the things we say are. Rachael you are right vagina does not make a woman.  Breasts do not make a woman.  A dress does not make a woman.  50,000 dollars in plastic surgery does not a woman make.  Why?  Discovering where we belong on the gender continuum is so much more than passing, or make up, or any of that other crap that has been crammed down our throats about what a woman is.  I see too many of us forced into stereo types of what women are.  The journey is our own we determine where it takes us.  Not friends, family, doctors, news papers, magazines, or TV.  We put too much sock into what others think instead of educating them on what our predicament is.

As can been seen with the passage of house bill H.R. 3685.  Many of the things that I have written in past posts are coming true.  Until we all get away from the tabloid like descriptions and ideals of what being and living Trans is, we as a whole will not be taken seriously.

Too many people still see us as deviants and cross dressers.  Just read the press.  The only people we have to blame for this are ourselves.  Many of you have gotten on me before for my form of advocacy and this House bill is the exact reason I live the way I do.  Only through knowledge and education will others understand.  Poetic Lumber and fairytales about living and being Trans will never work.

[cindybc]

Hi Robbie, welcome to Susan's or were you already a member here, if you were, I haven't noticed you here before. If so then please forgive me for being presumptuous. I must say that at least this entry is not as vacuous as your first one. OK we now got something to go on with several different aspects of defining transsexual phenomena and discovering and learning the gender continuum all while one is doing the transitioning. Transitioning is like a battlefield you know? Ya you never know if you will survive it to it's completion. Any way if your were some ticked about me please accept my apologies.

I have been living as a woman full time for going on 8 years now and had the surgery four years ago. I use to come here at Susan's 8 years ago and I got a job working as a social worker where I came out on the job full time seven years ago. If you knew me hon you would find out I wasn't anything but a stereotype or even further from being normal, But I come to not care all that much what society out there thinks of me, I am rather fond of my weirdness, you need someone to read your horoscope? I an do it for you without the book. but for my age I am passable enough to be the woman I present. "Eh "I won't get into that tonight, to much writing. 

Something I will never let go away and that's my imagination and my sense of humor, as long as the humor isn't directed at anyone in particular. You didn't leave us with much to identify as to who the writer of last nights post was. I will hold my imagination and humor to my bosom, for they are dear to me. They are like my life preserver when I am lost out there in a Sargasso sea of humanity.

Cindy   

[Wing Walker]

When writing that post I was pointing out how absurd many of the things we say are. Rachael you are right vagina does not make a woman.  Breasts do not make a woman.  A dress does not make a woman.  50,000 dollars in plastic surgery does not a woman make.  Why?  Discovering where we belong on the gender continuum is so much more than passing, or make up, or any of that other crap that has been crammed down our throats about what a woman is.  I see too many of us forced into stereo types of what women are.  The journey is our own we determine where it takes us.  Not friends, family, doctors, news papers, magazines, or TV.  We put too much sock into what others think instead of educating them on what our predicament is.

As can been seen with the passage of house bill H.R. 3685.  Many of the things that I have written in past posts are coming true.  Until we all get away from the tabloid like descriptions and ideals of what being and living Trans is, we as a whole will not be taken seriously.

Too many people still see us as deviants and cross dressers.  Just read the press.  The only people we have to blame for this are ourselves.  Many of you have gotten on me before for my form of advocacy and this House bill is the exact reason I live the way I do.  Only through knowledge and education will others understand.  Poetic Lumber and fairytales about living and being Trans will never work.

So what have you done to change things?  Have you gone to the Hill for Legislative Days?  Have you written to Congressman Barney Frank, Congresswoman Tammy Baldwin, Speaker Pelosi, Congressman Hoyer, or the Human Rights Campaign to tell them how you feel about a Trans-inclusive ENDA or a Hate Crimes Bill?  Have you contacted your state legislators to let them know your views on "Trans" issues?

This forum is a wonderful place to state one's opinions but the real forums are the legislatures, state and national.  I've written, called, opened my apartment to those who were on the Hill for the lobby week, and bombarded the HRC with my criticism of how well they represent the trans persons.

Change what you will or won't about yourself, until the law changes, nothing changes.

Wing Walker

[melissa90299]

Actually, and I know it sucks, but "passing privilege" means everything. I know what my life was before I had it and after and although I wouldn't call it a "living hell" I would say it is the difference between heaven and hell or at least limbo.

I was always a woman but what good is that if I get "gendered" constantly as male?

[Alison]

Discovering where we belong on the gender continuum is so much more than passing, or make up, or any of that other crap that has been crammed down our throats about what a woman is.  I see too many of us forced into stereo types of what women are. 

Amen..

Absolutely right.

[melissa90299]

Discovering where we belong on the gender continuum is so much more than passing, or make up, or any of that other crap that has been crammed down our throats about what a woman is.  I see too many of us forced into stereo types of what women are. 

Amen..

Absolutely right.

No one has forced me into any stereotype or any other feminine looking women, for that matter. IMNSHO That is a totally misogynistic POV as if we women are so easily manipulated, we could be forced into a stereotype. As if wanting to look sexy and feminine is something we do for MEN.

Guess what, girls, (I am speaking to girls, right?) most women dress for other women not for MEN.

[Alison]

Discovering where we belong on the gender continuum is so much more than passing, or make up, or any of that other crap that has been crammed down our throats about what a woman is.  I see too many of us forced into stereo types of what women are. 

Amen..

Absolutely right.

No one has forced me into any stereotype or any other feminine looking women, for that matter. IMNSHO That is a totally misogynistic POV as if we women are so easily manipulated, we could be forced into a stereotype. As if wanting to look sexy and feminine is something we do for MEN.

Guess what, girls, (I am speaking to girls, right?) most women dress for other women not for MEN.

I don't think that my gender has ANYTHING to do with my physical appearance.  If you look at me, ALL you will see is "woman".  I do NOT pass and frankly I don't think I ever will... 

I do find it amusing that you found me misogynistic considering I lived as a woman for 26 years and only recently discovered I wasn't.  If you wish to look sexy or 'feminine' I certainly hope you do it for yourself, but my point was (and I'd wager Robbie's point as well) looking 'feminine' and sexy does NOT "make you a woman".   What is the point in looking 'feminine' and sexy for other women (or men, or anyone else)?  Do it for YOU.

[Wing Walker]

Discovering where we belong on the gender continuum is so much more than passing, or make up, or any of that other crap that has been crammed down our throats about what a woman is.  I see too many of us forced into stereo types of what women are. 

Amen..

Absolutely right.

No one has forced me into any stereotype or any other feminine looking women, for that matter. IMNSHO That is a totally misogynistic POV as if we women are so easily manipulated, we could be forced into a stereotype. As if wanting to look sexy and feminine is something we do for MEN.

Guess what, girls, (I am speaking to girls, right?) most women dress for other women not for MEN.

I fully agree with you, Melissa.  I didn't care what the males on my job thought of my outfit, my hair, my nails, my makeup, whatever.  The desire to look good among the rest of the girls was just shy of competitive.

A few days after my reporting to work in my true birth gender, I was stopped by four of my GFs.  They formed a circle around me.  Each one looked intently at me before they agreed that I had my makeup on "flawlessly."  I was taken aback by their expert opinion and I keep that encounter in my heart to get me past the quiet times not that I'm retired.

I never had a male on the job tell me that I was dressed well or that my hair looked nice, but the girls did.  When I wore hot-looking shoes with matching handbag I got phone calls with uplifting comments  You can bet the bundle that I also returned the good words lavishly.

IMHO, there are no stereotypical women outside of television sitcoms.

The only male that I would ***ever*** dress for would be my partner or husband, and since I am soul mate and life partner to Cindy, that makes that point a non-starter in my life, thank you!

Wing Walker

[melissa90299]

I do find it amusing that you found me misogynistic considering I lived as a woman for 26 years and only recently discovered I wasn't. 

I wish I was so easily amused. Misogynism is so deeply rooted in our culture, it isn't confined to any gender.

If you wish to look sexy or 'feminine' I certainly hope you do it for yourself, but my point was (and I'd wager Robbie's point as well) looking 'feminine' and sexy does NOT "make you a woman".   

There are an awful lot of things that go into being a woman and for most women, being feminine is one of them.

What is the point in looking 'feminine' and sexy for other women (or men, or anyone else)?  Do it for YOU.

I do do it for me but I also do it to attract potential mates, female and male as well as being seen as an attractive person (in my case, a woman) by society as a whole. As well, physical attraction is only a part of it. Of course, the ugly people are going to whine about why physical attraction even matters. Well, it shouldn't but it does.

Tough.

[Rachael]

i totally agree, this community is full of steriotypes, and misconceptions of how we should act or be to b e 'true transexuals' and lets not forget the social hierarchy of this forum, and the community. a bloody, slippery ladder where everyone claws and bites thier way up...
'do you hate your penis'
'ive always felt i was a girl but only transitioned at 50'
'i pass better than you!'
'worship my ->-bleeped-<-ness'
'im post op, im better than all you disgusting preops'

Ok, the topic titles got more abstract to the end, but the meanings got more true.
This community is FULL of oneupmanship, we fight eachother more than prejudice.
If i was an anti trans campaigner, and got one look at this community, id wait for it to self destruct on its own and get a cuppa...
there is far too much narcasism in the trans community, and far too many steriotypes propogated through assumed feeling....
hmm, they all hate thier penis... maybe i should to, to be accepted?
R
R

[Berliegh]

I think a penis is the least noticeable part of a persons profile and in no way a gender indicator. In the western world we wear clothes, so genitalia is not seen and if someone has a penis or does not have a penis it doesn't define gender appearance at all. Some of the most atractive beautiful women I have ever seen were Brazillian transsexuals who still had their dicks....

Some of the most masculine men I've ever seen have been patients at U.K's London Charing Cross Gender Identity clinic and they were post op transsexual GRS patients...

Honour, I rest my case..

[Rachael]

what beliegh tactfully misses out, is those were m2fs
R

[Steph]

I personally believe that folks need to concentrate less on being transsexual and more on being a woman/man (as the case maybe).  My transsexuality was simply the journey, it's my womanhood that counts and this woman does not have a dick.  Chicks with dicks are seen as perverse and unnatural by society and I doubt very much that this perception will ever change.  It's the old "Acceptance" or "Completely passing" argument again.

Steph

[Rachael]

i agree... people concentrate on this too much...
personally ive gone for the completely pass option, well, just do....
life is easy, why bring it up?
R

[Kate]

I personally believe that folks need to concentrate less on being transsexual and more on being a woman/man ...

Or... maybe just focus more on being themselves, and let the chips fall where they may? I figure I'm Kate first, who *incidentally* also happens to be a woman. I think that it's exactly when people DO focus on "being a woman" that we end up with stereotypes and caricatures...

~Kate~

[Laura Elizabeth Jones]

I personally believe that folks need to concentrate less on being transsexual and more on being a woman/man ...

Or... maybe just focus more on being themselves, and let the chips fall where they may? I figure I'm Kate first, who *incidentally* also happens to be a woman. I think that it's exactly when people DO focus on "being a woman" that we end up with stereotypes and caricatures...

~Kate~

Right. You are better off if you would just be yourself instead of a stupid stereotype.