GCS with McGinn (After so many years waiting)

[jentay1367]

Gosh Monica, maybe the Doc can give you some anti depressants to at least get you over the hump. On the other hand, getting told everything is going well will probably go a long way to making you feel better. Good luck today! I really hope all is well.

[SadieBlake]

Antidepressants take a month to be effective and our Moni is gonna be feeling much better by then :-)

One thing that imx takes effect quicker is Sam-E, in the US it's a supplement, in Europe it's prescribed. Stands up well in clinical trials, works by increasing dopamine levels.

Hugs Moni, I had my first breakdown for tears post-op at 2 weeks when I tried going out for a walk without pain meds and was in terrible pain after covering a bare ⅛ mile and hobbling back. Q: are you already in the road?

[Jacqueline]

I wasn't able to cry for years. I now relish how relieving it is. I hope that helped.

Good thoughts sent down to you on your doctor's visit.

Warmly,

Jacqui

[Laurie]

Hoping you have (or had) a very good follow up doctor visit today Monica.
Luvs ya,
   Laurie

[Gail20]

Thanks so much Moni for sharing and leading the way. I'm not going to be blind-sided by so much because you've written here about your experiences. . . hope the sun shines thru really quick. . . .

[debrferguson]

    I waddled my butt back inside, sat down, and just cried for about an hour. One of those tension relieving, can't stop cries. As good as my mood has been, the surgery recover does kind of wear on you after a while. I feel better but I will keep an eye out for any signs of depression. I am lucky that I have more time before work starts. Am looking forward to seeing my friend Zel tomorrow.

I'm so sorry Moni. Tears can definitely be therapeutic. You are making progress. You will get there. My thoughts are with you.

[HappyMoni]

Thank you everyone. Gail, I feel good that I have helped u. I will be watching for you.

I had a pretty good visit. She cut out the looser white stuff. She describes it in terms of like a burn. They leave the dead skin   on a long time sometimes because it protects the new tissue underneath. It looks better and I peed better today. I asked her about dilation. She said I  could start playing around with green (Debbie's boyfriend?.) Also, if I am running late in the day, it is not the same to dilate longer on #4 time to make up a missed #5 time. She said each dilation breaks bonds that are forming that will eventually restrict the depth and width. I was also oked to push harder for more depth. I had felt like I was maybe causing issues by pushing too hard. Instead  she pushed against my hand to show me the force I could use and it was significant. I had a bit of awkwardness for the first time with her when I asked about the labia area. She took my question in a direction I had not intended. I felt a little  on the defensive briefly. No biggy, I think I am a bit sensitive here lately anyway. Maybe not having Ann here to center me is the problem. No, I'm just a psycho, more likely. lol
I had fun stopping by the recovery house. My friend Zel and I always have a good time and today was no exception. Feeling much happier today. Love to all.

Moni

Oh, when I got home I had a gift in the mail. It was addressed to Mrs. Moni (last name). There was no card so I don't know who to thank.  It was baked goods and preserves and other cool stuff. I am scratching my head.

[SadieBlake]

Moni baloney! Glad you were seen and things sound ok.

Hugs as ever

[Laurie]

Maybe not having Ann here to center me is the problem. No, I'm just a psycho, more likely. lol

Moni

Oh, when I got home I had a gift in the mail. It was addressed to Mrs. Moni (last name). There was no card so I don't know who to thank.  It was baked goods and preserves and other cool stuff. I am scratching my head.

   I'm on your side Moonika, Psycho, definitely psycho. 

I am a bit put out though... I made you preserves and you said you don't want them.
You my dear can be so cruel. 

Glad the appointment went okay and there were no serious problems. And yes a visit with friends is always uplifting for one's spirits.

Luvs ya,
  Laurie

[Jacqueline]

Moni,

Encouraging news. Glad it cleared up some issues despite the awkwardness. Must be a relief.

Keep making strides.

Warmly,

Jacqui

[Kendra]

Glad your checkup checked well.  Sounds like you are well past the most difficult part and it just gets better from here.

[LizK]

That's exactly what we want to hear, that every things is going well and healing as it should. 

[HappyMoni]

Thank you ladies, sane and crazy alike! (you know who you are)

I have a thought for anyone thinking of dilation as just a thing you have to do that is routine, boring, and without much purpose. (with McGinn, 5 times daily for for first 8-9 weeks)  I have maybe wondered about the number of times I do this with no real change. I was told initially that I had 5 inch depth, which sounded okay. I later heard of others having more, which I am happy for them. I was told yesterday by the doctor that it was critical to keep up dilations so as not to lose depth. I was like, yeah, yeah, yeah, I got that. Then she said I was healed well enough inside to try to increase depth and she pushed against my hand with surprising force to show me what I could  do. A light kind of turned on for me. It makes sense to me now that this initial healing phase is my window of  opportunity to maximize the result of the surgery. She spoke of pushing the body before the healing, in a sense, locked in the status quo. I feel like I now have a renewed purpose for keeping her schedule as well as I can. I believe, whatever one thinks of Dr. McGinn, she is committed to you getting a good result and expects you to do your part. I have too much invested in this surgery not to get the best result possible. I may never have a heat seeking missile aimed at my new best friend, but you never know what life brings.  That missile could be battery powered, so I want to be ready. lol  Anyway, if u have great depth already, this may mean nothing too you. Oh, time to go dilate, yipee! (Not)
Moni

[Rachel]

Awesome news. I was wondering how the appointment went.

How do you feel after the travel? Did she say the swelling is typical?

Dilation, I am so glad I kept to the schedule and pushed. I think I gained 1.5 inches and Chrystal said I have a lot of stretch beyond my depth. I had a difficult time with scar tissue. At a point the scar tissue started to contract. I had been dilating with all 4 dilators then all the sudden the tissue contacted. It was very painful. The use of hydrocortisone stretch out the scar tissue. 

I had gained 15 pounds after GCS. When I healed I changed my diet and am back to my pre-gcs weight. There is a time to lose weight and a time to heal.

[HappyMoni]

Rachel,

   Hi, I felt pretty good most of the trip, tired toward the end. I didn't drive but could have done a lot of it. She didn't see a  lot of swelling because I had used compression and did little activity. Today, I woke up to my first kind of normal feeling day. I cleaned up some then went on a short walk with my son. Now I am starting to feel some pain standing and it is swelling. She stressed that it is still early on. That was all I needed to know, that it was healing in the normal range. I can be calm as long as nothing is headed  off in some crazy direction.
   As far as dilation i see some change already pushing harder. I did just get green n orange in the mail today/yikes! Orange may have to be out of sight for a while so I don't get nightmares. May let my little friend go green just a little in a few minutes.
Moni

[Kendra]

> I can be calm as long as nothing is headed off in some crazy direction.

Based on recent scenery photos I think Laurie is still in Oregon.  So you can keep calm and carry on. 

[Laurie]

I just had this brought to my attention. This woman, Dr McGinn, is awesome! I thought you would like to see it Moni.

Hugs,
   Laurie

http://www.kptv.com/story/36001821/ex-navy-doc-vows-free-surgery-for-transgender-military-patients

[Kendra]

Wow - yes, absolutely awesome. 

[HappyMoni]

   Thank you Laurie. Dr. McGinn is apparently single handedly trying to destroy our military. (Can the logic get any more ridiculous?)

[Kendra]

see Doctor McGinn
unlocking patients future
beautiful result

cut and move and stitch
match each body to each brain
she's sharp like her knife

Commander in Chief
war on transgender soldiers
Twitter missile launch

McGinn's solution
thermonuclear response
priceless interview