I don't express myself because I'm afraid of not passing :(

[annemarie]

I don't know what to do about my dysphoria in the future when I move out of my parents house (I'm only 19 and about to enter university).

[Lady Lisandra]

Well, you are young and will probably pass if you start transitioning. The feeling probably won't go away, and might make you feel worse when the years pass. Think of the oldest girls in the forum. Lots of older trans women don't even care about passing, they're just tired of having acted like as man for 40+, and decide to transition even though they know passing won't be easy.

It could be easy for you at your age...

[KathyLauren]

What to do about your dysphoria is something to work out between you and your therapist.  Not everyone needs to transition; not everyone needs to be binary.  It depends on how you experience your dysphoria, how you see yourself, what your social situation is, so many factors.

If that is you in your avatar photo, then visually, you will have no trouble at all passing.  Of course, we can't see your body language or hear your voice.  But, if they prevent you from passing now, those are both things you can work on.

The need to pass is something else to talk about with your therapist.  How well do you need to pass?  Personally, I only need to pass well enough that decent people will gender me correctly.  I don't really care if they clock me as trans or not.  I am one of those "older girls".  Your needs may be different.  There is lots of material for discussion there.

[DawnOday]

I don't know what to do about my dysphoria in the future when I move out of my parents house (I'm only 19 and about to enter university).

Pick someone you like. I chose Meryl Streep and Sally Fields because they are my age. My voice coach is also my transition mentor and she has me watching interviews on youtube to pick up on vocal inflections, gestures, body language, dress, and interaction. A smile will go a long way in establishing your persona. Growing up as a guy, smiling is something that came very grudgingly.  Many universities in the US and UK have programs for transitioning students. Here is one set of guidelines for UWE Bristol. www2.uwe.ac.uk/services/Marketing/about-us/.../pdf/Trans-student-guidance.pdf  Google the University you are interested in for their transgender support policies. Be up front and discuss with your counselor. Once you find an ally or two everything will be much easier. Whatever you decide. it will take time. Good luck.
Dawn

[elkie-t]

I don't know what to do about my dysphoria in the future when I move out of my parents house (I'm only 19 and about to enter university).

You won't know until you try. You won't try until your dysphoria overwhelms your fear. I waited for 20 years before venturing out from home. So much time wasted...

[Lady Lisandra]

You won't know until you try. You won't try until your dysphoria overwhelms your fear. I waited for 20 years before venturing out from home. So much time wasted...

Exactly. If you wait until it becomes a necesity, you'll regret the wasted years. Give it a try now, just to be sure. As mentioned above, everyone's path is different. You don't have to fully transition, just go as far as it makes you happy and comfortable. Perhaps you feel more like a man sometimes, but for a few days you'd prefer being a woman. And that's fine too.

[elkie-t]

I thought further on it, maybe my thoughts aren't comforting, but believe me they are rather provocative than judgmental.

Women are brave. They jump into relations with unknown beasts called men that are physically much stronger, depart their safety haven, ready to suffer to a great extent physical and emotional abuse, not mentioning childbirth, raising the child, and possibility they would have to do it alone... Maybe, if you're afraid to be feminine, and because your inner fear stops you from doing what you want, you don't _deserve_ to be a female?