Subconscious awareness of HRT?

[Stevie]

 We have four cats one of them was always a bit aloof with me. After I had been on HRT for about 3 months she started to come sit on the back of the chair behind me and nuzzle her head into my hair. She now is super affectionate gives me kisses and is always seeking attention from me.
Another thing happened that was not as benign at work, I incrementally transitioned openly at work and was actually full time before starting HRT,  and I never had any problems with anyone there about it. After I had been on HRT for a couple of months one day I was putting on my lab coat and I caught one of my male co-workers giving me a head to toe look over when I made eye contact with him he looked away trying act like nothing happened. Things changed after that  he became openly hostile toward me and actively tried to turn others against me. A few of my co-workers who before were very supportive started to not talk to me unless I spoke to them first  and would only say as little as they had too.
I no longer work there, the place I work now has never known me as anyone but Stephanie and has treated me as such.

[Drexy/Drex]

Hi Stevie I know what you mean I'm starting  to detect a bit of that but because I'm still riding  on the coat tails of my male  self's reputation I have some breathing  space,  thing is I'm  not out.. I don't Look femme nor act it
I think the problem  guys are the ones who are latent bisexuals and can't  except themselves... Their the ones to watch out for
Not gay because gay men like men

[LadyGreen]

I'm three weeks in and not out in public but i think people are looking at me more and acting more awkward. I cant tell if its because my manner has changed, i dont bother trying to be masculin and ive got longer hair/nails than most guys not to mention a really soft voice now. Or if its a hormone thing (i dont smell like a dude anymore) but people do seem to react funny to me.

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[Doreen]

It can't be Proven but I think it's some kind of pheromones.  When I first started hrt I totally didn't look or act any different at all. But I noticed girls staring at me longer, like they were trying to figure out what was different. And unfortunately guys seemed to notice me more, but not in a good way. They would give me a kind of confused look for a second and then call me ->-bleeped-<-ot instead of saying it immediately like before.

I really think it's some kind of pheromones or something to do with smell. My body odors, sweat and pee especially have become very noticeable to my dad and brother and my brothers friends. They don't necessarily find them offensive odors but they do notice them. Maybe it's because hrt changes body chemistry and they notice my odors because they are now different from theirs.

When I started back on HRT 2 years ago I had a guy in my exercise class flat out tell me I smelled weird.   Keep in mind I've been living stealth, full time, for over 20 years.  I just kind of looked at him quizzically.  Sure I was sweaty, but I don't generally stink as a whole... certainly not like HIM.   It might've been the combination of sweat and dampness on my clothing too, who knows.  I'm androgen resistant, this I know 100% true (My testosterone count is always either unreadable or rather low)... so certainly I don't think I ever smelled 'like a guy' to others.  Maybe its my imagination.   The only real stares I get for the most part are in relation to my height.   I still get a lot of 'deer in headlight' stares like I'm some kind of exotic creature.. but none of the face screwed up in distaste stare. 

Maybe its pheromones.. maybe something else. Who knows.  I don't think even the people doing it really do, its probably some subconscious thing.

[DawnOday]

I have noticed since starting HRT that no matter how many showers I take I still get a yeasty smell to my groin.

[Stevie]

I think the problem  guys are the ones who are latent bisexuals and can't  except themselves... Their the ones to watch out for
Not gay because gay men like men

I don't think it has anything to do with being bisexual. I had been presenting as female for 8 months prior to this with no problems.  I think after starting HRT there was an attraction to my increasing feminine  aura that he could not reconcile with his knowing I was trans. He feared he was being attracted to a male instead of woman, a trans woman but none the less still a woman. His primitive thought process could not understand that trans women are women and that attraction to us is normal.  His reaction to this was an attempt to prove he was still hetro to himself. 

[Jessica]

Hi Jessie 🙋. I think it may be pheromones also.  Though I've always been outgoing and interact with others and seem to receive the same openness from most.  What I am now is more aware of it and that makes me happy and feel real good.  Our bodies are changing, physically, mentally and chemically.  It all is part of learning to be feminine in body and soul.
Hugs, Jessica 💁

[Drexy/Drex]

I don't think it has anything to do with being bisexual. I had been presenting as female for 8 months prior to this with no problems.  I think after starting HRT there was an attraction to my increasing feminine  aura that he could not reconcile with his knowing I was trans. He feared he was being attracted to a male instead of woman, a trans woman but none the less still a woman. His primitive thought process could not understand that trans women are women and that attraction to us is normal.  His reaction to this was an attempt to prove he was still hetro to himself.

That makes sense,  and I think perhaps on a subconscious  primitive  level that might be happening  in my workplace which includes the camp etc,  like the younger guys who kinda hero worshiped me  and so were so focused  on me already are giving  themselves  a hard time with this confusion 

[Drexy/Drex]

Hi Jessie 🙋. I think it may be pheromones also.  Though I've always been outgoing and interact with others and seem to receive the same openness from most.  What I am now is more aware of it and that makes me happy and feel real good.  Our bodies are changing, physically, mentally and chemically.  It all is part of learning to be feminine in body and soul.
Hugs, Jessica 💁

Jessica yes thats true of all I have got from hrt so  the most important  thing I've now found is the peace of mind and happiness  I could actually  if I had to or wanted be quite content  with just that alone,  it's amazing  how much clearer  thinking  now is

[Doreen]

Jessica yes thats true of all I have got from hrt so  the most important  thing I've now found is the peace of mind and happiness  I could actually  if I had to or wanted be quite content  with just that alone,  it's amazing  how much clearer  thinking  now is

I think what I gained from HRT is slightly more stamina... I don't feel so 'worn thin' anymore.   Perhaps a little more emotional than normal, though I was always pretty emotional to begin with.  Hard to tell after all these years, but it does feel much better being on HRT than the times I went off.

[Drexy/Drex]

Well.... had my first distinctly uncomfortable  experience... I was sitting  in a corner of the wet mess having drinks with work mates...the way the seating was there was no where else for them to look but at me one of them started  to look  confused  and fearful  then the female gym coach came around  as she was selling raffle  tickets when she looks at me and looked up and said I didn't want any as she looked at me her smile went to I guess confusion.. perhaps disbelief  my mate soon left....

[JessiCalypsoƸ̴Ӂ̴Ʒ]

No, unfortunately I didn't grow up as a girl. I was an androgynous, extremely feminine boy. Thankfully my dad never pushed masculine behavior on me. He had tried doing that when I was very young but I was very resistant to it and he gave up. He wouldn't let me wear actual female clothes but he let me wear gender neutral clothes in any color I wanted. Even pink, which I wore often.lol. I had had such extreme fits when he tried to take me to get haircuts that he just gave up when I was about nine. I refused to go to a hair salon or barber shop so he would cut a couple of inches off it himself once in a while to keep it from growing to my butt. Lol. When I was 14 I started using make up. The first time my dad saw me with make up he all he did was ask me if I knew it made me look like a girl and was I sure I wanted to go out like that. Then he told my brother to keep an eye on me and make sure the other kids didn't mess with me. I think that's why my brother tends to be over protective at times even now.

I'm extremely lucky that my father was so accepting. It's kind of surprising considering his background. (Marine corps and now a cop) My mom wasn't very accepting but all she really did was just bitch about it. She did once tell my dad that he had made this mess (she was talking about me) and don't come crying to her when I grew up to be a drag queen. Lol. So it was no surprise to my dad or brother that I'm trans.

Sorry I didn't reply sooner, ran out of minutes on my phone. Anyway I'm so sorry that your mom said that about you... That's awful. You're not a mess! From reading your posts you seem well balanced, that's why I thought you had been raised as a girl. The only "mess" parents of TG children make is when they force them to be something they're not, like my parents did to me. I'm 33 & I have to start a whole new life... I don't even know who I am... But it's ok. I'm just happy to finally have the chance to find myself. It's been hard, but kinda fun to discover what my interests & stuff are! With that background I'm very surprised your dad took it as well as he did, maybe where he already had sons it wasn't as important to him for you to be masculine. And also surprising that your mom was the one to object... is she more accepting now? Did your family begin using proper pronouns pretty quickly? If you don't mind me asking, of course. I find other trans people's journeys very interesting; despite all of our lives being so different, there are many common hurdles, & themes, I guess you could say. I LOVE writing, & I've been keeping a diary of my own journey, & I think it would be really cool to interview other trans people & get their stories, and publish a compilation of them or something, someday...

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[paula lesley]

Hi, JessiCalypsoƸ̴Ӂ̴Ʒ.

I'd just like to wish you luck and send you love+huggs. You are an inspiration.


Paula, X.

[JessiCalypsoƸ̴Ӂ̴Ʒ]

Hi, JessiCalypsoƸ̴Ӂ̴Ʒ.

I'd just like to wish you luck and send you love+huggs. You are an inspiration.


Paula, X.

Awww! Thanks Paula, you're very sweet!! <hugs> right back atcha!!

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