Megan, I think that I hear what you are saying. There are pictures around the house from the old days. He was a good man and did neat things. Some of the photos are from the mountains where I loved to trek or from business trips to Asia, many with my wife. These are good memories that are difficult to relegate to a position of insignificance. He is gone, no coming back and I can occasionally get caught in the position of missing some of that magic. But there is a reason he had to go. If he hadn't, I do not expect that either one off us would still be alive now and certainly not vitally enjoying life, as if for the first time. I miss parts of him but those characteristics are within me, and for the parts that about killed me, well, they are gone. And the pain, any that shows up for missing him is trivial compared to the hollowness of his daily life.
I expect that we all will feel some degree of melancholy from time to time and mine give me time to pause in retrospect but I can't even begin to consider ever trying to accept the old life again. I wish you the best with wrestling through the old memories.
Tia Anne
