Quote from: PollyQMcLovely on March 05, 2018, 09:20:48 PM
I find this forum to be one of the most welcoming and supportive places on all of the internet.
I wish I could say that was true for me. Susan's (rightly) attracts a cross section of mostly north american people and as such necessarily reflects a pretty broad array of trans people; trans identity doesn't discriminate wrt political or social outlook, race, creed etc.
I live in the radical, activist wing of the trans house and as such my views (which run closer to those of borenstein, claifia or serano than say jenner) are absolutely intersectional, feminist and queer. Also while I've only undertaken medical transition in the last 3 years, I've been transitioning and living as mostly out and functionally lesbian in my personal life for 20 years.
So when I interact with people who are just coming out, who may be hetero-normative or fail to see things in terms of privilege ... Well sometimes I don't feel all that accepted. That's in marked contrast to my real life in which I spend most of my time among 20-30 year olds, living and working in Cambridge ma which
has.to be one of the most accepting places in the US.
More than half of the people I interact with daily are in one way or another queer and 99.5% of the rest are fully accepting of lgbtq identities. I'm lucky and privileged in this and remember that pretty much daily.
And yet in my real life I have to seek out safe space, queer and activist spaces that are guaranteed to be safe and respectful are just different. I need these spaces and time with my support networks to recharge because a world that's 50% queer is still predominantly cis or hetero.
And then I come here, a space that tries pretty hard to be safe and welcoming. And yet there are routine denials of fundamentals of feminism and of lgbtq activism as I understand them. In my idea of safe lgbtq space the concepts of post structuralism, queer theory etc are a shared basis of understanding. I don't get that here, nor do I expect it.
All of the above notwithstanding, I'm entirely on board with this:
Quote
You guys are the best.
I don't actually need to be understood to feel accepted and I've made some truly close friendships here with people who make me feel both understood.and accepted.
OP, I was a Susan's member in '99-00 and I remember a ton of sniping between prevalent and often antagonist views of transitioning women vs cross dressers vs nonbinary folks (who were a brand new phenomenon then).
Deciding that my path didn't match any of the above (i was femme, lesbian, non transitioning transexual) I left because the arguments weren't interesting and I'd found the sisters I needed who did understand, value and validate my path.
For better or worse, transition is a time that's often fraught with conflict. People come here usually in conflict in their real lives, spouses, social circles and looking for answers. Transition by it's nature is imx not an easy time and can be incredibly stressful.
And so to answer your question, compared to 20 years ago, yes, attitudes have changed. Compared to 5, I couldn't say, I was spending that time grappling.with accepting my need to transition via hrt and GCS.
