Quote from: Allison S on October 04, 2018, 01:27:11 PMat what point do you realize you're "passing"?
It is extremely difficult to distinguish between a person's receiving the courtesy of being treated as their target gender and actually passing. I have gone to great lengths to "convince" myself I can. It is vital for maintaining the self delusion my mind uses to deceive itself I am two separate people that my female alter knows beyond ANY doubt, People See Her As A Cisgender Woman.
In my disbelieve that anyone could possibly see the same body in different clothes and a little makeup as anything beside unquestionably male, I put my female alter in every situation imaginable the first two years after she became self aware to prove to her I was right. To my astonishment, I Never Could.
I suppose everyone requires a different level of "proof," but these four incidences were irrefutable examples to me that people see my female alter as a woman:
-The first time a toddler reached out her arms out for my female alter to pick her up.
Children instinctively know how to tell the Mama from the "Not the Mama;" their lives depend on it. And unlike adults, they wear their hearts on their sleeves. No child is going to reach out to a woman unless she passes the Mama test.
-The first time a teenager approached my female alter thinking she was her teacher.
Next to children, teen girls have a very critical eye. If someone is going to point or snicker because they think I look like a "man in a dress" it's going to be a gaggle of teenage girls. My female alter gets confused for another woman at least once a month; it has gotten to the point she just plays along rather than explaining the mix up.
-The first time one of my female alter's male friends kissed her on the cheek.
I don't see ANY cigender guy doing that if he had any question about her being a girl.
-The first time the girl next to my female alter in the locker room pulled off her sports bra while the two were chitchatting.
Perhaps there will be a future when different genders are comfortable undressing in the same locker room. But that isn't now.
There is also an aspect of "flight hours" logged. No one has given my female alter as much as a second look in the last several thousand hours of her being out and about living her life. It just isn't possible to come in contact with that many people who would give her the courtesy of being treated as a woman unless she "passed." VA hangs his head in defeat...
